1. Unplug the refrigerator.
2. Turn the ओवन on.
3. Rearrange the furniture. (Turn a bedroom into a dining room, and vice versa.)
4. Hide the remote.
5. Hide the television.
6. Hide the pets.
7. Change the answering machine message.
8. Turn off the answering machine.
9. Change the speed dial numbers.
10. Change the alarm clock time to twelve hours earlier.
11. Add an extra goldfish to the goldfish bowl.
12. Leave a condom wrapper under a sofa cushion.
13. Make yourself a meal. Be polite and wash the dishes.
14. See how much pay-per-view porn आप can order in one day.
15. Set the TiVo to record nothing but infomercials.
16. Leave a note on their computer that says "Thanks for the files."
17. Leave a note anywhere that says "I'll be back."
18. Leave a note listing a website address. Set up a website and post a चित्र of yourself sitting on their toilet. (Don't forget to wear a ski mask.)
19. Replace a crucifix with Mickey Mouse.
20. Install video surveillance equipment. Leave a tape of yourself installing it.
21. Paint "Helter Skelter" on a wall.
22. Replace दीवार चित्रो with चित्रो of someone else's family.
23. Replace products with similar products of a different brand. If they own Heinz ketchup, replace it with Hunt's. If they own Tide laundry detergent, replace it with All.
24. Tie a nylon string across each doorway at shin level.
25. Paint their bathrooms black.
26. Paint their mirrors black.
27. Paint their windows black.
28. Nail their windows shut.
29. Put a skeleton in a closet.
30. Stuff a तकिया with live crickets. (Available at your local pet store.)
31. Hang dead things from the ceiling.
32. Wrap a miscellaneous animal organ in aluminum foil and leave it in the freezer.
33. Empty the sugar container and replace it with Sweet & Low.
34. Fill every glass in the रसोई, रसोईघर cabinet with water. (They might not spill the सेकंड या third glasses, but fill them all anyway.)
35. Turn off the phone ringers.
36. Leave the stereo, alarm clock, and टेलीविज़न volume set to maximum.
37. Exchange the contents of two clothing drawers.
38. Grease the banisters.
39. Leave counterfeit paw prints up a wall, ending at a ceiling vent.
40. Put a rubber अचार in the अचार jar. Replace the jar's label with a label identical in every way except for the phone number for complaints. (I could tell आप what phone number to include, but why don't आप figure it out?)
41. Call for खाना delivery. Repeat two dozen times quickly before leaving.
42. Make urine ice cubes.
43. Pee in the shampoo.
44. Take the book jackets off the hardcover पुस्तकें and put them around multiple copies of the same cheap book आप purchased previously at a dollar store. If आप can get copies of a book with blank pages, even better.
45. Unscrew the light bulbs.
46. Hide the toilet paper.
47. Put their possessions into piles based on color.
48. Make a bathtub full of iced tea.
49. Bring in a small, battery-powered recording device. Turn it on and play a looping recording of a young girl whispering, "Jesus is coming." Unscrew a ceiling vent and throw it in as far as आप can.
50. Plant weeds in the flowerpots.
By: Jason Roth
2. Turn the ओवन on.
3. Rearrange the furniture. (Turn a bedroom into a dining room, and vice versa.)
4. Hide the remote.
5. Hide the television.
6. Hide the pets.
7. Change the answering machine message.
8. Turn off the answering machine.
9. Change the speed dial numbers.
10. Change the alarm clock time to twelve hours earlier.
11. Add an extra goldfish to the goldfish bowl.
12. Leave a condom wrapper under a sofa cushion.
13. Make yourself a meal. Be polite and wash the dishes.
14. See how much pay-per-view porn आप can order in one day.
15. Set the TiVo to record nothing but infomercials.
16. Leave a note on their computer that says "Thanks for the files."
17. Leave a note anywhere that says "I'll be back."
18. Leave a note listing a website address. Set up a website and post a चित्र of yourself sitting on their toilet. (Don't forget to wear a ski mask.)
19. Replace a crucifix with Mickey Mouse.
20. Install video surveillance equipment. Leave a tape of yourself installing it.
21. Paint "Helter Skelter" on a wall.
22. Replace दीवार चित्रो with चित्रो of someone else's family.
23. Replace products with similar products of a different brand. If they own Heinz ketchup, replace it with Hunt's. If they own Tide laundry detergent, replace it with All.
24. Tie a nylon string across each doorway at shin level.
25. Paint their bathrooms black.
26. Paint their mirrors black.
27. Paint their windows black.
28. Nail their windows shut.
29. Put a skeleton in a closet.
30. Stuff a तकिया with live crickets. (Available at your local pet store.)
31. Hang dead things from the ceiling.
32. Wrap a miscellaneous animal organ in aluminum foil and leave it in the freezer.
33. Empty the sugar container and replace it with Sweet & Low.
34. Fill every glass in the रसोई, रसोईघर cabinet with water. (They might not spill the सेकंड या third glasses, but fill them all anyway.)
35. Turn off the phone ringers.
36. Leave the stereo, alarm clock, and टेलीविज़न volume set to maximum.
37. Exchange the contents of two clothing drawers.
38. Grease the banisters.
39. Leave counterfeit paw prints up a wall, ending at a ceiling vent.
40. Put a rubber अचार in the अचार jar. Replace the jar's label with a label identical in every way except for the phone number for complaints. (I could tell आप what phone number to include, but why don't आप figure it out?)
41. Call for खाना delivery. Repeat two dozen times quickly before leaving.
42. Make urine ice cubes.
43. Pee in the shampoo.
44. Take the book jackets off the hardcover पुस्तकें and put them around multiple copies of the same cheap book आप purchased previously at a dollar store. If आप can get copies of a book with blank pages, even better.
45. Unscrew the light bulbs.
46. Hide the toilet paper.
47. Put their possessions into piles based on color.
48. Make a bathtub full of iced tea.
49. Bring in a small, battery-powered recording device. Turn it on and play a looping recording of a young girl whispering, "Jesus is coming." Unscrew a ceiling vent and throw it in as far as आप can.
50. Plant weeds in the flowerpots.
By: Jason Roth
Never mind the haters. All they do is break आप down. Build yourself up and ignore them. Don't they look so small from up here?
When they make a nasty comment, pretend they aren't there. They'll never get to आप that way. When they kick and scream at other peoples hating टिप्पणियाँ about them, don't they look silly?
When they ask why आप like what आप do, ask them why they like what they like. "How's it feel, huh?"
Hater will say many things, some the probably don't mean. But, if someone does hate, ask them, "Why? Why do आप do it? Do आप have nothing else to do with your life?" Just ignore them, they hate that. All the want is attention. And whatever आप do, don't give it to them.
-JC
When they make a nasty comment, pretend they aren't there. They'll never get to आप that way. When they kick and scream at other peoples hating टिप्पणियाँ about them, don't they look silly?
When they ask why आप like what आप do, ask them why they like what they like. "How's it feel, huh?"
Hater will say many things, some the probably don't mean. But, if someone does hate, ask them, "Why? Why do आप do it? Do आप have nothing else to do with your life?" Just ignore them, they hate that. All the want is attention. And whatever आप do, don't give it to them.
-JC
The blode curdurling sound of a monkey killing a innersent केला, केले even the thought makes me scream.
i am the leader of a very special groupe H.B.S
that stands for help bananas society
every minite a केला, केले is being tortured but
there is someone helping that someone is me
bobby flobby hobbie jo thats my name but आप can call me bobby jo
i shall return with a और stories of the help bananas society
dum de de de dum dum dum de dum
BANANAS!
(thats the tune of are क्लब्स song)
केला, केले केला, केले भेड़ are there फ्रेंड्स
BANANAS
i am the leader of a very special groupe H.B.S
that stands for help bananas society
every minite a केला, केले is being tortured but
there is someone helping that someone is me
bobby flobby hobbie jo thats my name but आप can call me bobby jo
i shall return with a और stories of the help bananas society
dum de de de dum dum dum de dum
BANANAS!
(thats the tune of are क्लब्स song)
केला, केले केला, केले भेड़ are there फ्रेंड्स
BANANAS
one दिन that ugly little rabbit waz walkin down the buunyy trail when suddenly a wich came out of now where she had the blackest skin peter asked wats ur name she replied with nastynes in her voice mrs white but of course that stupid bunny कहा hello there mrs white this made the wich angery so she took peter back to her cottege peter thought phh well were are just goin on our first तारीख, दिनांक ohh how wrong waz he then wich finaally got him घर AND TREW HIM IN THE CLOSET AND SILLY BUNNY DECIDED TO GO घर AND SO WHEN HE LEFT THE CLOSEST A SWARM OF BEES CHASED HIM INTO THE WICHES ROOM AND HE WOKE HER UP ANS SHE कहा WHAT WICH MADE BUNNY CRI SO THIS MADE THE WICH HUNGERY SO SHE कहा COM HERE PLZ AND WHEN SHE DID WELL LETS JUST SAY BYEBYE BYEBYE BYE BYE PETER COTTEN TAIL HELLO BUNNYZSOUP
THIS STORY IS TO STOP THE ABUSES OF BUNNYZ EVERYWHERE SO PLZ DONATE TO PLACES
YES I NO STUIPED I GOT BOREED
THIS STORY IS TO STOP THE ABUSES OF BUNNYZ EVERYWHERE SO PLZ DONATE TO PLACES
YES I NO STUIPED I GOT BOREED
I was like totally like walking like down the like, cotton कैन्डी road like 45 like सेकंड्स पूर्व and I like saw a hot like dog and totally yelled, "Like आप like skinny little like pot head like monkey." And then I like totally like kicked a puppy. Then I like went घर and like told my brother I like think he like is a like talking wierner with like talking wierner powers that like let him like mow the lawn.
That was like a like better like दिन in the like life of a like polar bear.
~dinglebell14
P.S. ~ Don't आप wanna mix cotton कैन्डी and popscicles!
That was like a like better like दिन in the like life of a like polar bear.
~dinglebell14
P.S. ~ Don't आप wanna mix cotton कैन्डी and popscicles!
हे guys! My फ्रेंड्स Sydney is on फैन्पॉप now! She is on Lady gaga site and Skillet site! I am so far her only fan, so if आप guys want to be a प्रशंसक of bubblegirl2 then go to the two क्लब्स ubove there! Plez check out her profile! She is realy nice and cool and she is a christian, and realy cute! No I'm not a lesbian, but she told me to say that! She will be happy to शामिल होइए आप guys with your fans! So... pppplllllleeeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzeee!!!!!!
1. Chickens say jerk jerk.
2. Cows say moop moop meep.
3. Bunnies say chirp chirp.
4. Lobsters say clurp clurp clurp.
5. Chickens say burgack burgack.
6. ड्रॅगन्स say shlurp shlurp.
7. Snakes say slither tither slither tither.
8. Elephants say near near fear near.
9. Moose say poooo poooo low.
10. Bears say guro guro guro.
11. Alligators say pow pow bow pow.
12. मछली say blub blub blub.
13. यूनिकॉर्न say ashshnifafurfur.
14. Monkeys say quack quack quack brack.
15. Frogs say rebite rebite.
2. Cows say moop moop meep.
3. Bunnies say chirp chirp.
4. Lobsters say clurp clurp clurp.
5. Chickens say burgack burgack.
6. ड्रॅगन्स say shlurp shlurp.
7. Snakes say slither tither slither tither.
8. Elephants say near near fear near.
9. Moose say poooo poooo low.
10. Bears say guro guro guro.
11. Alligators say pow pow bow pow.
12. मछली say blub blub blub.
13. यूनिकॉर्न say ashshnifafurfur.
14. Monkeys say quack quack quack brack.
15. Frogs say rebite rebite.
A husband went to the doctor and tells the doctor
"I think my wife is going deaf"
-Doc-"Just to find out do this test on her
stand 50 feet away from her and ask her something if she doesn't respond हटाइए 10 feet closer and try the same thing as so forth"
So the husbad got घर and found the wife preparing रात का खाना and asks her
"Honey, Whats for dinner" No reply
he moves 10 feet closer and tries again
"honey whats for dinner" No reply
so he moved 10 और feet closer and tries again
"honey whats for dinner" she उत्तरों back and says
"For the third freaking time its chicken"
"I think my wife is going deaf"
-Doc-"Just to find out do this test on her
stand 50 feet away from her and ask her something if she doesn't respond हटाइए 10 feet closer and try the same thing as so forth"
So the husbad got घर and found the wife preparing रात का खाना and asks her
"Honey, Whats for dinner" No reply
he moves 10 feet closer and tries again
"honey whats for dinner" No reply
so he moved 10 और feet closer and tries again
"honey whats for dinner" she उत्तरों back and says
"For the third freaking time its chicken"
Washington Post Competition asked for a two line rhyme with the most romantic first line and least romantic सेकंड line.
This is the (hands down!!) winner...
'My darling,my love,my beautiful life;
Marrying आप simply demolished my life.
I see your face when i'm dreaming;
That's why i always wake up screaming.
Kind, intelligent, loving and HOT;
This describes everything you're not.
I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don't take the paper bag off your face.
I प्यार your smile, your face, your eyes;
Damn,I'm good at telling lies!!!.'
This is the (hands down!!) winner...
'My darling,my love,my beautiful life;
Marrying आप simply demolished my life.
I see your face when i'm dreaming;
That's why i always wake up screaming.
Kind, intelligent, loving and HOT;
This describes everything you're not.
I want to feel your sweet embrace;
But don't take the paper bag off your face.
I प्यार your smile, your face, your eyes;
Damn,I'm good at telling lies!!!.'