Princess Celestia
Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic इंद्रधनुष as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny
Derpy entered Celestia's office.
Derpy: It appears Twilight is up to her tricks again. What are your thoughts?
Celestia: I thought we were finally done with this nonsense. But I guess not. I was having a nice rest, now this! God only knows what kind of shenanigans she has in store this time-
A 50 weight fell on her head.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: *Leaves the office, and takes a left into the hallway. She walks into another room, and looks at Twilight Sparkle* LMFAO.
Audience: *Laughing*
Later, Bryan met up with two Mexicans.
Mexican टट्टू 1: What's good?
Bryan: We're ready to commit antics again. I'm looking for the best firecrackers available.
Mexican टट्टू 1: Roman candles, bottle rockets, चेरी bombs, या sparklers?
Bryan: Twilight told me आप guys have a पासवर्ड for "certain" firecrackers.
Certain is the password.
Mexican टट्टू 1: I think we can help you. *Walks with the सेकंड Mexican pony* Get your नितंब, गधा over here.
Mexican टट्टू 2: *Walks toward Mexican टट्टू 1*
Mexican टट्टू 1: *Opens a wardrobe*
Audience: *Laughing*
Mexican टट्टू 1: *Pushes Mexican टट्टू 2 into the wardrobe* They want firecrackers. Come back when आप get them! *Closes the wardrobe*
Audience: *Laughing*
Back at the castle.
Celestia: *In the shower. Outside, several ponies are listening to her* It's been a long time since I've had a good shower. I feel like a brand new mare. I'll watch Twilight Sparkle like a hawk.
Derpy: *In the शावर, शॉवर with Celestia* Should I start on your backside?
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Make sure आप get every last pore back there.
Audience: Ew! *Laughing*
Celestia: And no surprise reach arounds.
Audience: *Vomitting*
The sound of firecrackers could be heard in the shower.
Celestia: What?! What's going on?!?! There's firecrackers in here!!!!
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Later.
Jonathan: So the princess had a mishap in the शावर, शॉवर this morning.
Chrysler: It's been two weeks since the last antic Twilight pulled on Celestia.
Jonathan: Things were very peaceful in those two weeks. Now who put the firecrackers in Celestia's shower?
Twilight: Man, it was me आप idiot.
Audience: *Laughing*
Chrysler: Why would you-
Twilight: I started a Yo Mamma contest.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: Surely, आप wouldn't do something that juvenile.
Twilight: I am.
Jonathan: *Angry* A Yo Mamma contest?! आप couldn't think of something clever?
Twilight: Man, it was either dat, या fondles for charity.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: Let me take one good guess, it's just a cover. You're really planning a larger antic!
Twilight: No shit.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: *Chewing on a piece of gum, and blows a really big bubble. It pops after hitting Harry* I'll need to borrow the kids around the bunker.
Meanwhile, in Celestia's office.
Celestia: *Looking at a portal that Derpy put on her wall*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: What is that blue shit doing on my wall? Get that down from there! Explain your actions, right now! I can only assume Twilight sent आप in here with that portal gun. How rude! Twilight is screwing with me again! *Stands up, and bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!! *Bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!!
Meanwhile in another part of Celestia's castle, colts, and fillies were running around a small room that had seven bunk beds.
Alexis: *Looking at the colts, and fillies* Quiet आप brats!
Audience: *Laughing*
Colts & Fillies: *Be quiet*
Alexis: Gather around.
Colts & Fillies: *Get close to Alexis*
Alexis: As आप all know, Princess Celestia just got her PS4, and now has Gran Turismo 6.
Colts & Fillies: Yay!!
Alexis: आप want to play, right?
Colts & Fillies: Yeah.
Outside of Celestia's castle, and in the town of Canterlot, things were turning into shit.
Rich Ponies: *Pushing a trolley* We're rich. We shouldn't be doing this. That's why we invented slaves!
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Old Stallion: *Looking at teenage ponies working on an anti aircraft gun. One of them is his son*
10 साल Old Colt: *Angry at his dad* We're working on an antic here.
Old Stallion: How old are you? *Looks at colt* Twelve? *Looks at another colt* And you, thirteen? Aren't आप lot too young to be playing pranks on the princess?
16 साल Old Stallion: So what if we are? Why do आप care?
Old Stallion: Twilight has आप brain washed.
16 साल Old Stallion: She asked us nicely to help. In return, she's giving us gummy bears.
Audience: *Laughing*
16 साल Old Stallion: You'd be a fool to turn down gummybears.
Audience: *Laughing*
Old Stallion: We had two weeks of peace, and quiet, and आप kids are ruining it. The last thing we need is to have Celestia clawing her own eyes out.
15 साल Old Mare: We need our dose of lolz.
Audience: *Laughing*
Old Stallion: If आप don't like reality, why don't आप just run off to Pleasure Island?
10 साल Old Colt: Ugh, आप suck! *Runs 100 miles an घंटा to Pleasure Island*
Audience: *Laughing*
Old Stallion: Okay then.. Fine. But if she finally loses her sanity, I'll know who to blame. *Walks away*
Back at Celestia's castle.
Chrysler: *Walks into a room, and looks at drunk Royal Guards* I don't have the patience for this, so let's get this over with. Your momma is so big, her shadow has it's own bedroom.
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Royal Guard: Your momma is so stupid, she got लॉस्ट at a supermarket, and starved to death.
Audience: *Laughing*
Later, Skeletor was ordering a पिज़्ज़ा, पिज्जा with Jenny.
Skeletor: I want the entire चोटी, शीर्ष of the पिज़्ज़ा, पिज्जा to be engulfed in anchovies. Olives are for dicks.
Timothy: *Walks into the room*
Skeletor: I'm sure I don't have to tell आप where I am.
Audience: *Laughing*
Skeletor: Goodbye. *Hangs up, and walks to Timothy* आप ready? Jenny, I want आप to start लेखन this down. I want this verbal smackdown to be historical.
Jenny: *Gets paper, and a pencil ready*
Skeletor: *Looks at Timothy* Your mother finally let आप out of the house?
Timothy: At least my mother actually has a house.
Audience: *Laughing*
Timothy: Your momma is so poor, she got evicted from a cardboard box.
Audience: *Laughing*
Skeletor: Your momma is so ugly, her कुत्ता have to take her for a walk every now, and again.
Audience: *Laughing*
Timothy: Your momma is so ugly, everypony goes trick या treating as her yearbook photo.
Audience: *Laughing*
Skeletor: What about how bald your momma is? She makes Michael Jordan look like Zach Galifianakis.
Audience: *Laughing*
Skeletor: I looked at her scalp, and saw the future.
Timothy: *Stunned*
Skeletor: Yeah. Not much to say now, right? I'm running this show!
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Timothy: *Walks away*
In Celestia's rant room.
Celestia: *Shouting* I can't believe you're all talking about my family!! Harry's mom is so stupid, she almost decapitated herself with a marshmallow!!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: Your momma is so stupid she heard there were illegal aliens, and looked up for UFO's!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Your momma is hideous!!! She makes Sarah Jessica Parker look like The Mona Lisa!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Bangs her hoof on her desk* Who else?!!?
Everyone stayed silent.
At dinner.
Skeletor: Princess, that was some of the best ownage I've ever seen.
Celestia: Right now, I'm wondering what that clown was planning with all of those Yo Momma jokes going around the castle. I would have liked to insult her mother. She's the only one in the bunker I know that completely deserves it, but enough of these shenanigans.
Royal Guard: *Walks in with a package*
Celestia: The keys to my new Ford. *Takes the package* I heard the Focus was a really good model, so I bought one.
After dinner, Celestia was walking into her office when this happened.
Celestia: *Falls through a hole in the floor*
Audience: *Laughing*
Back at her office.
Celestia: That's it!! Send an extermination squad to kill her when she least expects it! Vengeance!! Annihilate that Twilight! *Stands up, and bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!! *Bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!!
In Ponyville.
Royal Guards: Twilight Sparkle, आप are underarrest.
Twilight: Wuuuut?
Royal Guard: Orders from Celestia. She's pissed off, because आप dug a hole in her room.
Twilight: Bite me. It was a bunch of kids that did it!
Audience: *Laughing*
Royal Guards: *Preparing their assault rifles*
Twilight: *Opens a portal on her chest* Gotcha!!!!
Royal Guards: *Shoot into the portal*
The bullets went through Celestia's दीवार where the other portal was placed.
Celestia: *Getting hit द्वारा the bullets*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: That hurt like all hell.
Derpy: Should I go to the first aid kit, and get some band aids?
Audience: *Laughing*
Coming up next, enjoy the bloopers from this episode.
Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic इंद्रधनुष as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny
Derpy entered Celestia's office.
Derpy: It appears Twilight is up to her tricks again. What are your thoughts?
Celestia: I thought we were finally done with this nonsense. But I guess not. I was having a nice rest, now this! God only knows what kind of shenanigans she has in store this time-
A 50 weight fell on her head.
Audience: *Laughing*
Derpy: *Leaves the office, and takes a left into the hallway. She walks into another room, and looks at Twilight Sparkle* LMFAO.
Audience: *Laughing*
Later, Bryan met up with two Mexicans.
Mexican टट्टू 1: What's good?
Bryan: We're ready to commit antics again. I'm looking for the best firecrackers available.
Mexican टट्टू 1: Roman candles, bottle rockets, चेरी bombs, या sparklers?
Bryan: Twilight told me आप guys have a पासवर्ड for "certain" firecrackers.
Certain is the password.
Mexican टट्टू 1: I think we can help you. *Walks with the सेकंड Mexican pony* Get your नितंब, गधा over here.
Mexican टट्टू 2: *Walks toward Mexican टट्टू 1*
Mexican टट्टू 1: *Opens a wardrobe*
Audience: *Laughing*
Mexican टट्टू 1: *Pushes Mexican टट्टू 2 into the wardrobe* They want firecrackers. Come back when आप get them! *Closes the wardrobe*
Audience: *Laughing*
Back at the castle.
Celestia: *In the shower. Outside, several ponies are listening to her* It's been a long time since I've had a good shower. I feel like a brand new mare. I'll watch Twilight Sparkle like a hawk.
Derpy: *In the शावर, शॉवर with Celestia* Should I start on your backside?
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Make sure आप get every last pore back there.
Audience: Ew! *Laughing*
Celestia: And no surprise reach arounds.
Audience: *Vomitting*
The sound of firecrackers could be heard in the shower.
Celestia: What?! What's going on?!?! There's firecrackers in here!!!!
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Later.
Jonathan: So the princess had a mishap in the शावर, शॉवर this morning.
Chrysler: It's been two weeks since the last antic Twilight pulled on Celestia.
Jonathan: Things were very peaceful in those two weeks. Now who put the firecrackers in Celestia's shower?
Twilight: Man, it was me आप idiot.
Audience: *Laughing*
Chrysler: Why would you-
Twilight: I started a Yo Mamma contest.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: Surely, आप wouldn't do something that juvenile.
Twilight: I am.
Jonathan: *Angry* A Yo Mamma contest?! आप couldn't think of something clever?
Twilight: Man, it was either dat, या fondles for charity.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: Let me take one good guess, it's just a cover. You're really planning a larger antic!
Twilight: No shit.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight: *Chewing on a piece of gum, and blows a really big bubble. It pops after hitting Harry* I'll need to borrow the kids around the bunker.
Meanwhile, in Celestia's office.
Celestia: *Looking at a portal that Derpy put on her wall*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: What is that blue shit doing on my wall? Get that down from there! Explain your actions, right now! I can only assume Twilight sent आप in here with that portal gun. How rude! Twilight is screwing with me again! *Stands up, and bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!! *Bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!!
Meanwhile in another part of Celestia's castle, colts, and fillies were running around a small room that had seven bunk beds.
Alexis: *Looking at the colts, and fillies* Quiet आप brats!
Audience: *Laughing*
Colts & Fillies: *Be quiet*
Alexis: Gather around.
Colts & Fillies: *Get close to Alexis*
Alexis: As आप all know, Princess Celestia just got her PS4, and now has Gran Turismo 6.
Colts & Fillies: Yay!!
Alexis: आप want to play, right?
Colts & Fillies: Yeah.
Outside of Celestia's castle, and in the town of Canterlot, things were turning into shit.
Rich Ponies: *Pushing a trolley* We're rich. We shouldn't be doing this. That's why we invented slaves!
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Old Stallion: *Looking at teenage ponies working on an anti aircraft gun. One of them is his son*
10 साल Old Colt: *Angry at his dad* We're working on an antic here.
Old Stallion: How old are you? *Looks at colt* Twelve? *Looks at another colt* And you, thirteen? Aren't आप lot too young to be playing pranks on the princess?
16 साल Old Stallion: So what if we are? Why do आप care?
Old Stallion: Twilight has आप brain washed.
16 साल Old Stallion: She asked us nicely to help. In return, she's giving us gummy bears.
Audience: *Laughing*
16 साल Old Stallion: You'd be a fool to turn down gummybears.
Audience: *Laughing*
Old Stallion: We had two weeks of peace, and quiet, and आप kids are ruining it. The last thing we need is to have Celestia clawing her own eyes out.
15 साल Old Mare: We need our dose of lolz.
Audience: *Laughing*
Old Stallion: If आप don't like reality, why don't आप just run off to Pleasure Island?
10 साल Old Colt: Ugh, आप suck! *Runs 100 miles an घंटा to Pleasure Island*
Audience: *Laughing*
Old Stallion: Okay then.. Fine. But if she finally loses her sanity, I'll know who to blame. *Walks away*
Back at Celestia's castle.
Chrysler: *Walks into a room, and looks at drunk Royal Guards* I don't have the patience for this, so let's get this over with. Your momma is so big, her shadow has it's own bedroom.
Audience: *Laughing*
Drunk Royal Guard: Your momma is so stupid, she got लॉस्ट at a supermarket, and starved to death.
Audience: *Laughing*
Later, Skeletor was ordering a पिज़्ज़ा, पिज्जा with Jenny.
Skeletor: I want the entire चोटी, शीर्ष of the पिज़्ज़ा, पिज्जा to be engulfed in anchovies. Olives are for dicks.
Timothy: *Walks into the room*
Skeletor: I'm sure I don't have to tell आप where I am.
Audience: *Laughing*
Skeletor: Goodbye. *Hangs up, and walks to Timothy* आप ready? Jenny, I want आप to start लेखन this down. I want this verbal smackdown to be historical.
Jenny: *Gets paper, and a pencil ready*
Skeletor: *Looks at Timothy* Your mother finally let आप out of the house?
Timothy: At least my mother actually has a house.
Audience: *Laughing*
Timothy: Your momma is so poor, she got evicted from a cardboard box.
Audience: *Laughing*
Skeletor: Your momma is so ugly, her कुत्ता have to take her for a walk every now, and again.
Audience: *Laughing*
Timothy: Your momma is so ugly, everypony goes trick या treating as her yearbook photo.
Audience: *Laughing*
Skeletor: What about how bald your momma is? She makes Michael Jordan look like Zach Galifianakis.
Audience: *Laughing*
Skeletor: I looked at her scalp, and saw the future.
Timothy: *Stunned*
Skeletor: Yeah. Not much to say now, right? I'm running this show!
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Timothy: *Walks away*
In Celestia's rant room.
Celestia: *Shouting* I can't believe you're all talking about my family!! Harry's mom is so stupid, she almost decapitated herself with a marshmallow!!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: Your momma is so stupid she heard there were illegal aliens, and looked up for UFO's!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Your momma is hideous!!! She makes Sarah Jessica Parker look like The Mona Lisa!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Bangs her hoof on her desk* Who else?!!?
Everyone stayed silent.
At dinner.
Skeletor: Princess, that was some of the best ownage I've ever seen.
Celestia: Right now, I'm wondering what that clown was planning with all of those Yo Momma jokes going around the castle. I would have liked to insult her mother. She's the only one in the bunker I know that completely deserves it, but enough of these shenanigans.
Royal Guard: *Walks in with a package*
Celestia: The keys to my new Ford. *Takes the package* I heard the Focus was a really good model, so I bought one.
After dinner, Celestia was walking into her office when this happened.
Celestia: *Falls through a hole in the floor*
Audience: *Laughing*
Back at her office.
Celestia: That's it!! Send an extermination squad to kill her when she least expects it! Vengeance!! Annihilate that Twilight! *Stands up, and bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: *Bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!! *Bangs on her desk* TWILIGHT!!
In Ponyville.
Royal Guards: Twilight Sparkle, आप are underarrest.
Twilight: Wuuuut?
Royal Guard: Orders from Celestia. She's pissed off, because आप dug a hole in her room.
Twilight: Bite me. It was a bunch of kids that did it!
Audience: *Laughing*
Royal Guards: *Preparing their assault rifles*
Twilight: *Opens a portal on her chest* Gotcha!!!!
Royal Guards: *Shoot into the portal*
The bullets went through Celestia's दीवार where the other portal was placed.
Celestia: *Getting hit द्वारा the bullets*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: That hurt like all hell.
Derpy: Should I go to the first aid kit, and get some band aids?
Audience: *Laughing*
Coming up next, enjoy the bloopers from this episode.
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see. Pingas!
Pinkie's Ghost
It was a dark night, and there was lots of fog. Then, the ghost टट्टू was seen running through the streets of Ponyville. He was killed in an accident on Halloween, and every साल on the दिन of the accident, the ghost टट्टू runs around ponyville, shreiking like a लॉस्ट soul!
Rainbow Dash: Pinkie, what are आप talking about?
Pinkie Pie: The ghost pony. Snips, and Snails saw it last night.
Rainbow Dash: Where?
Pinkie Pie: They didn't tell me. Oh, it makes my legs wobble to think about it.
Rainbow Dash: Ha! You're just a gullible pony....
Master Sword waved a loaded pistol around the bank.
Master Sword: YOUR BEING ROBBED!! (Points gun at employee) WERE'S YOUR MONEY!!
Employee: (crying) p, please don't kill me!
Master Sword: (dramatically) please don't MAKE ME!
(Sword and Saten arrive into the back of the bank)
Saten: Dude, what are आप doing!?
Master Sword: No talk! We gotta take all this cash!
Saten: Soooo, nobody can steal it?
Master Sword: Uhhhhhh... Yeah!
Saten: Hmmm , Good idea (starts grabbing money bags)
(Outside)
Sword and Saten are sneaking off with money bags..
The cops from टट्टू mov: FREEEEZE!!!
Saten: Oh shit! We're so dead!
Master Sword: Leave it to me........... (To the टट्टू mov cops), it's alright!.. We're cops!!!!
(Long silence)
Sword and Saten are suddenly thrown into a jail cell.
Master Sword: Damn it! I was so so sure that was gonna work!!
TO BE CONTAINUED
Master Sword: YOUR BEING ROBBED!! (Points gun at employee) WERE'S YOUR MONEY!!
Employee: (crying) p, please don't kill me!
Master Sword: (dramatically) please don't MAKE ME!
(Sword and Saten arrive into the back of the bank)
Saten: Dude, what are आप doing!?
Master Sword: No talk! We gotta take all this cash!
Saten: Soooo, nobody can steal it?
Master Sword: Uhhhhhh... Yeah!
Saten: Hmmm , Good idea (starts grabbing money bags)
(Outside)
Sword and Saten are sneaking off with money bags..
The cops from टट्टू mov: FREEEEZE!!!
Saten: Oh shit! We're so dead!
Master Sword: Leave it to me........... (To the टट्टू mov cops), it's alright!.. We're cops!!!!
(Long silence)
Sword and Saten are suddenly thrown into a jail cell.
Master Sword: Damn it! I was so so sure that was gonna work!!
TO BE CONTAINUED
The cops from pony mov
Eris's Eyes
"Oh god" I thought. "Moon Dust sure is weird." "Eris are आप alright!" Luna gasped. She ran down the hallway to Eris. "Your mother has been looking for you!" She exclaimed. "The other fillies were messing with her again." Moon Dust quickly said.
"What!" Celestia walked into the hallway. Moon Dust quickly bowed down. "Hello Princess" Moon Dust said. "Get up Moon Dust I'm sick of आप doing that your my sister's apprentice your practically royal" She stood up "This has to end" "But, Mom I'm so sick of being babied! आप know what I wish आप all would let me deal with my problems!" I ran out of the hallway out of the गढ़, महल and to the mountains.
"Oh god" I thought. "Moon Dust sure is weird." "Eris are आप alright!" Luna gasped. She ran down the hallway to Eris. "Your mother has been looking for you!" She exclaimed. "The other fillies were messing with her again." Moon Dust quickly said.
"What!" Celestia walked into the hallway. Moon Dust quickly bowed down. "Hello Princess" Moon Dust said. "Get up Moon Dust I'm sick of आप doing that your my sister's apprentice your practically royal" She stood up "This has to end" "But, Mom I'm so sick of being babied! आप know what I wish आप all would let me deal with my problems!" I ran out of the hallway out of the गढ़, महल and to the mountains.
"Luna, I don't feel good, at all I need to go to our room." Celestia gasped. "Tia I'm coming with you" Luna replied. Luna helped Celestia up to their room. Celestia felt something stir inside her. "Help me into my bed!" Celestia shouted.
Luna helped her into the blankets. "Celestia! You're Pregnant! You're having a filly!" Luna gasped. "Or a colt" Celestia answered. For about a couple hours Luna stayed at her side till it about 8:00pm. The filly was born. "She's beautiful" Celestia said. Luna looked at her and noticed something. "She's Discord's she looks exactly like she's a draconacus." Luna कहा with tears. "How could आप have a filly with Discord!" Luna sobbed. Celestia drew Luna close. "I made a mistake, but it's not आप या Eris's fault" she answered.
"You called her Eris?" Luna sniffled. "Princess Eris Luna after my little sister." Celestia replied. Luna and Celestia both cried tears of joy for the new princess.
Luna helped her into the blankets. "Celestia! You're Pregnant! You're having a filly!" Luna gasped. "Or a colt" Celestia answered. For about a couple hours Luna stayed at her side till it about 8:00pm. The filly was born. "She's beautiful" Celestia said. Luna looked at her and noticed something. "She's Discord's she looks exactly like she's a draconacus." Luna कहा with tears. "How could आप have a filly with Discord!" Luna sobbed. Celestia drew Luna close. "I made a mistake, but it's not आप या Eris's fault" she answered.
"You called her Eris?" Luna sniffled. "Princess Eris Luna after my little sister." Celestia replied. Luna and Celestia both cried tears of joy for the new princess.
