Please read, and then help me with a title... thnk you!

The thought


I see my mother in my brain and smile.
“can आप believe it?” asks Blake. I shake my head, no, looking down from the पहाड़ी, हिल sitting on a boulder. Looking at the battlefield from this height kind of makes me scared, but from all of the things that have happened to me I wash the fear out of my brain.
“Trudy? What is going through your head now? आप look sad… and happy at the same time,” Asked blake in his usual, soft, voice.
“I remember the दिन I have left my mother and father to go here… today … to save our world… but, what do I do now… we can’t go back and I can’t do anything here. All of my फ्रेंड्स I met here have died,” I say raising my voice and getting madder and madder.
I stop my concentration on the ground below us and stare at blake. He flinched as I talked more.
“This is your entire fault! I wouldn’t have left my house if आप hadn’t been my”—
A pain in my feet rose up into my whole body.
“Trudy!” shouted blake. I fell to the ground on all of my fours. “Forget it!” I sputter. “Trudy I know it has been a hard few hours but,”—
“12! 12 hours,” I say.
“Yes, thank you, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t have a good time, does it?” blake says helping me up. I sit on the boulder.
“Today is my birthday, I am 13 now, and I won’t see my father nor mother neither will I see a delicious cake that says happy birthday”—I hold back tears, but one falls down my cheek—“Trudy!” I yell and it echoes.
blake tries to calm me down, but I sob और and more. Finally it hits blake that he won’t be able to see his father (his mother had died earlier) and I see him gulp in fear.
“Is there a way we can get out?” he says now in his small scared voice. I shake my head. “One, we have these stupid charm bracelets that, that evil guy gave us. And two, even if we didn’t have the bracelets on, then I would still not know where the portal is,”
*
OH NOES! it cut off!!!
RiverIce posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना
*
I look down at my wrist. The charm bracelet has one charm of a silver heart. I take my stare of the charm bracelet off and get up from the boulder. “Trudy what are आप doing?” asked blake. I step on the edge of the पहाड़ी, हिल and stare at the 500 foot drop. “Don’t jump! Trudy! Don’t jump!” blake yells. I ignore him and let his words past me.
RiverIce posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना
 RiverIce posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना
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लेखन जवाब

wolfclan121 said:
ok first और punctuation and swap mind with brain since it just sounds weird and out of line titles um.... i dont know cuz i dont really understand what its about
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posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना 
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srry, its botu this girl and boy and they have been फ्रेंड्स since birth, and then this guy says they have to save the world yada yada yada and then they do but then there stuck.
RiverIce posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना
SueLuvsVJ101 said:
Nice one! I think it should be called 'Alone'. आप might wanna try लेखन it more, well.....IDK, School wiseXD
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posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना 
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लोल
RiverIce posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना
Moonlight_Kitty said:
I can see where आप need to संपादन करे a couple of things, other than that it's great. I want to know और about this story.

As for a title, that's going to be hard. I can think up some good ones but I need to know और about the story.

Here are some titles from the चोटी, शीर्ष of my head, आप can use these as ideas for a better title....
'Battle Ground'
'Runaways'
'Search for freedom' (sorry if it sounds cheesy)
'Escape'
remember these are just simple ideas आप can use to think of a title.
I hope this helps. :)
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posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना 
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those are good ones! :)
RiverIce posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना
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