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It sounds like a cat.XD
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Just पढ़ना some of the टर्मिनेटर कोट्स through again... and actually found a hint on what happened between Arnold and the maid. Enjoy my version!


Maid: Nice night for a walk, eh?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Nice night for a walk.
Maid #2: Wash दिन tomorrow? Nothing clean, right?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Nothing clean. Right.
Maid: Hey, I think this guy's a couple cans short of a six-pack.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Your clothes... give them to me, now.
Maid: Fuck you, asshole!
Arnold nods.


I know there are a lot of people making fun of Arnold Schwarzenegger since he admitted to his wife that he's not only a cheater but a liar as well. आप might get annoyed द्वारा it and think "Oh poor Arnie". But honestly? This guy just ASKED for it. It takes a big jerk to have a child with another woman, an even bigger one to keep it a secret for 14 years and the biggest one to only reveal it to his wife after he quit his job so there'd be no damage to his position.
posted by lloonny
1. Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
2. Some people wear सुपरमैन pajamas. सुपरमैन wears Chuck Norris pajamas
3. Chuck Norris will never have a दिल attack. His दिल isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
4. If at first आप don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
5. Chuck Norris can set ants on आग with a magnifying glass. At night.
6. Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
7. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
8. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
9....
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INT. A SHOPPING MALL WE'VE USED BEFORE - DAY.

The mall. Teenage girls bury their heads in piles of clothes and giggle. A Sale Sign goes up and they scream. Mothers drag kids द्वारा their heels. As the people pass by, they glance uncomfortably at something off-screen then hurry along. The children point, faces uncomprehending.

Pan over to find ZIM and गिर in a dark corner, near a waste receptacle, dressed as clowns. ZIM just stares out evilly at the passing people. गिर simply stares, holding balloons.

ZIM (to GIR)
Look at them, GIR. THEY think we are clowns. But we are not clowns.

GIR gasps in shock....
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 This is your new mascot. All hail the bunny!
This is your new mascot. All hail the bunny!
Of course, if आप are TRULY random, आप shouldn't even need a guide, O_O

Randomness, randomosity, randomology, whatever आप may call it, is using improvisation to create original humorous phrases या monologues या pine cones on the spot. 'Randomosity' is fun to express in the presence of फ्रेंड्स या logging companies, but can quickly become extremely obnoxious. Have fun with your randomness, don't force it. Remember, if आप got it, Flaunt it!

Steps

1. Break free of conventional rules. Finishing your sentences is not mandatory, merely optional and आप can do it on Tuesdays but not on Wednesdays...
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"An old woman haunted me!"

One night my and द्वारा brothers and I were sleeping up stairs while my mom was downstairs reading. I was lying in बिस्तर and heard this light stomping sound. Then the stomping sound got a little heavier. Soon, it became so loud that my brothers and I all came out of our room because we were scared. My mom had heard it too and she thought it was one of us playing a joke, but it wasn't - we were all in bed! We had no idea what to make of it and were really freaked out. But then, things got creepier....

"We found her stuff in the attic, her name was Tamara!"

I went over to...
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(CREATED द्वारा RAE RI, NOT ME)

Chuck Norris can make onions cry.


Chuck Norris can मिटाइए the Recycling Bin.


Ghosts are actually caused द्वारा Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.


Chuck Norris can strangle आप with a cordless phone.


Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.


Chuck Norris once had a दिल attack; his दिल lost.


Chuck Norris doesn't turn the light on; he turns the dark off.


The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.


Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.


When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror, the mirror shatters; not even a mirror is stupid enough to get between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.


Chuck Norris's tears can cure aids, too bad he never cries. (silvaze9)
posted by yoshifan1976
Doctor Mario was in his office when suddenly there was an urgent phone call. It was Daisy. "Mario, come quick. Luigi's very sick." "I'll be there right now, Daisy", Mario told her. Nurse आड़ू, पीच was very concerned. "What's wrong, Mario?" "Luigi's sick", he answered with worry. "Go", आड़ू, पीच told him kindly. "I can take care of things here." "Thanks, Peach". He gave her a किस and then rode over to Luigi and Daisy's house. गुलबहार, डेज़ी hugged Mario and led him upstairs. "Hey little brother", he smiled at Luigi. Luigi smiled back. He loves his big brother Mario. No one understood the brotherly bond between...
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added by loonybug
Source: tumblr
No, I seriously hate it whenever I hear kids talk about डिज़्नी and celebrities, they say crap like "OMG Justin Bieber is awesome!" "The Jonas Brothers are having a new movie!" "Have आप watched Shake it up? It's the best thing डिज़्नी has made!"
It sickens me that parents allow their kids to watch & listen to the mediocre shit डिज़्नी Channel produces now rather than to have them watch & listen to some REAL डिज़्नी & music. Even the trash फिल्में like Prom, John Carter, Mars Needs Moms, and some of the डिज़्नी direct-to-video sequels are better than the crap डिज़्नी Channel has to offer....
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posted by hetalianstella
This is in no particular order.

- I hate how people automatically assume आप are Chinese just because you're Asian, या automatically assume आप are Mexican just because आप are Hispanic.

- How people always say they COULD care less when they COULDN'T care less!

- When people use an elevator.....for one floor!

- Perverts....I mean, I don't hate perverts. Some of my best फ्रेंड्स are perverts. But I'm not a pervert, so don't act like a pervert around me. Anywhere else is fine, but please respect my asexuality.

- When people overuse lol.
Especially when there is nothing funny!
Same with OMG. I...
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added by 8theGreat
 Fullmetal Alchemist Live Action Movie.
Fullmetal Alchemist Live Action Movie.
So i watched the Live action Fullmetal Alchemist Movie on Netflix with a friend. IT is a good movie. I liked how it stayed true to the FMA/Brotherhood story. And Edward Elric the actor is too tall looking. But other than that,the live action FMA Movie is spot on. Glad they did not fully mess up with this movie. Hope they make another one.

I feel that Netflix and Warner brothers did a good job on this movie. People out there in the world need to stop comparing ऐनीमे live actions to the episodes. It's like how Marvel and DC फिल्में change and is not similar to the comics and कार्टून sometimes....
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added by SilentForce
(Just a heads up for anyone who doesn't take nicely to curse words, they दिखाना up in this article. So, viewer discretion advised. Though it is discernibly less profane than most of my other work.)

Hidelly ho, neighborinos! Surprise surprise, I'm not actually dead.

Well, at least not yet anyway. Have I jinxed myself before this लेख has even started...?

Quite possibly, Jared. आप fucking idiot.

Anyway, since I've got some ideas and motivation up my sleeve, I decided to write a song for ya'll. I'm sure the शीर्षक alone will win myself a million Grammies.

And when I say that, I'm not referring to...
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It was a peaceful, King Dedede-free morning in Pop Star. Birds chirped. Bunnies hopped around. All of the folks are playing merrily, and then there's... Kirby, who was flying in his Warp तारा, स्टार for the reason of feeling the breeze through his light, गुलाबी skin. Normally, he'd use the Warp तारा, स्टार as a mode of transportation, but today was the day.

Kirby: [singing] I believe I can fly,
I believe I can touch the sky,
Here in Pop तारा, स्टार I can fly so high.
On my Warp Star, won't it make me cry...

Unfortunately, Kirby had happened to fly too far, in fact, TOO far that he went off bounds from Pop तारा, स्टार and flew...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song: link

Narrator: Sugar. Spice, and everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls, but Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction. Chemical X!
Professor: *Gets moved backwards द्वारा an explosion, but smiles when he sees what he created*
Narrator: Thus the Powerpuff Girls were born! Using their ultra super powers, Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime, and the forces of evil.
Blossom: *Flies through the sky*
Bubbles: *Flying to the right of Blossom*
Buttercup: *Flying to the left of...
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 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see. *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see.
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see. *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see.


It was a typical दिन in New York City. People were walking down the sidewalks, and cars crowded the streets, but in front of a coffee shop, a man was sitting, while typing on his laptop.

SeanTheHedgehog's

Person 94: *Typing on his laptop inside the coffee shop*
Background People: *Drinking coffee, and eating donuts*

SeanTheHedgehog's
Wonderful World

Taxi Driver: *Going over 60, passing several other cars*
Man 89: *Hugging his suitcase* Do all taxi drivers drive like this in the city?
Taxi Driver:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song: link

Narrator: Sugar. Spice, and everything nice. These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little girls, but Professor Utonium accidentally added an extra ingredient to the concoction. Chemical X!
Professor: *Gets moved backwards द्वारा an explosion, but smiles when he sees what he created*
Narrator: Thus the Powerpuff Girls were born! Using their ultra super powers, Blossom, Bubbles, and Buttercup have dedicated their lives to fighting crime, and the forces of evil.
Blossom: *Flies through the sky*
Bubbles: *Flying to the right of Blossom*
Buttercup: *Flying to the left of...
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