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"As I was sleeping on the tree, something suddenly tickled me. It wasn't like a तकिया feather या a back scratcher, but was और like a scaley tickle. As I giggled in my sleep, a tight squeeze suddenly brought my attention. As I woke up and looked around, I realized I was being trapped द्वारा a large python- a 20 ft long sucker at that!

I had no idea how this snake found me nor did I wanted to know why he caught me. The large seprent suddenly squeezed me tighter and tighter until my face turned dark purple. I was suffocating to my death. It would've been the end of the world for me. Luckly, the jungle woman brought help. Her entire family and troop memebers followed her all the way to the same पेड़ where she left me. When she and all of them looked up however, they were frightend. The leader of the tribe, a strong musclar man, commanded his troops to begin shooting arrows at the giant snake. The tribe fired their spears at the giant creature and the sight of fast, flying arrows got the snake panicked. With that said, the snake uncolied me and slithered fast up the tree. I took a gulp of air and sighed hardly. The woman climbed up the पेड़ and apologised for leaving me up there alone. I told her it was fine.

With a friendly smile, she grabbed my hand and told me to jump. With that, she and I jumped down from the पेड़ and to the ground. Once that was done, she introudeced me to her family as well as her tribe. The tribesmen were suprised to see me as well. They soon began interacting with me much easier too. After that, they all took me to their village.

Their village was a very big place. It was piled with tiny, tiki houses, children played around in the yards, and hard workers did their best to keep their pits cleaned and sharp. The woman also taught me the life story of the tribe and how they first lived on the island. She even mentioned the story about the meanacing creature that attacks them.

The creature's name was "Lukemba", the giant demon of the island. She even gave me a very good विवरण of what the beast looked like- it was 10 ft tall, had spiral horns, sharp teeth, and had beaming red eyes that if anyone stares at them, they would be turned into ashes. This story scared the ghost out of me. Even though I was a bit frightend, I knew I would count on her and her troops to protect me as well as each other. I also figured once I get use to their culture, I might become one of them as well, though getting back घर is important too.

While I was enjoying fun times in the tribe's village, about several feet from where the troop's घर was at, there was a huge swamp. This swamp was dark, murky, and stinky as well. Not very much activity goes on in these parts except for croaking frogs and screeching swamp birds. However, something did change in the swamp that very moment- for loud foot steps could be heard, echoing through the jungle. These beaming sounds scared every creature away. It was just then that the apperance of a pair of large, gargantuan feet appeared, colored green. The monster has appeared, and looks very hungry."
added by Ilovebaxter
added by TizzFan4evr
E-mails, text messages, voicemails- आप name it, we’ve got it. Technology has created many creative and wonderful ways for us to keep in touch with each other, as well as make our lives easier at the same time. With our busy schedules, it is not always easy to keep in touch with फ्रेंड्स and family the way we would always like to. The days of sitting down and having a nice, long phone conversation seems like a memory of the past and is a rare thing to happen on a frequent basis these days. Not to worry though, because with E-mails and text messaging available, we are sure to keep in touch...
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1. Ruin there प्रिय dress with lipstick
2.Slap them in the face with something alive
3. Make a bath for them with salt.
4. When they are at a fancy dinner, make fart noises
5. Run around them saying "Your butt is smelly!"
6. Say infront of everyone that your enemy watches Dora.
7. Fill a water ballon with सूप and prank him.
8. किस her boyfriend right In front of her
9. Push her into a 20 ft pool. (Espicially if she can't swim)
10. Steal her wallet and spend all her money and use her credit card. (Or through it in the trash.)


All made up द्वारा me. ^ ^
I decided to create a सूची of twenty of my personal favourite hard rock songs.

No AC/DC, people. I'm sorry.

1. "Highway Star", द्वारा Deep Purple
2. "Fear Of The Dark", द्वारा Iron Maiden
3. "Money For Nothing", द्वारा Dire Straits
4. "Sharp Dressed Man", द्वारा ZZ Top
5. "Come On Feel The Noise", द्वारा Quiet Riot
6. "Love In An Elevator", द्वारा Aerosmith
7. "Still Of The Night", द्वारा Whitesnake
8. "Nobody's Wife", द्वारा Anouk
9. "Stairway To Heaven", द्वारा Led Zeppelin
10. "Smokin'", द्वारा Boston
11. "Cherry Bomb", द्वारा The Runaways
12. "Mother, द्वारा Danzig
13. "Voodoo", द्वारा Black Sabbath
14. "Hot Blooded", द्वारा Foreigner
15. "Barracuda", द्वारा Heart
16. "Turn Up The Radio", द्वारा Autograph
17. "I प्यार आप Period", द्वारा Dan Baird
18. "Rock & Roll 69", द्वारा Betty Blowtorch
19. "I Can't Drive 55", द्वारा Sammy Hagar
20. "Carry On Wayward Son", द्वारा Kansas
These are our rules! Please note ... these are
all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE!

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put
it down. We need it up, आप need it down. आप don't hear us
complaining about आप leaving it down.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of
it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what आप want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints
do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes, and No are perfectly acceptable जवाब to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you...
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1.find something old and breakable and go up to a apartment या building या highest floor in your house and open a window and estimate how long it will take that thing to hit the groung then throw it out the the window and cout how many seconds/minutes it takes to hit the ground really.
2.go to wal-mart,enough said
3.go outside and try to sell a old stuffed animal on a leash to people who look important to society,like hobos
4.go to your neighbors and tell them they need to stop the rucus and to shut up your trying to sleep even if its the middle of the दिन and they arent making any noise
5.go to...
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posted by x-menobsessed26
Useful Hawaiian Phrases
On the Plane
My how your perfume fills the entire cabin!
'A'ala maoli keia wahi o kakou i kau wai 'ala kuikawa!


If I snore, I would like to apologize in advance
Ke nono au, e kala mua mai, i keia manawa ho'i.


I am filled with admiration for my in-flight meal
Kahaha ko'u na'au i ke 'ano o ka mea 'ai ma keia mokulele.


Only six dollars for a headset? Why thats only three dollars per ear!
Eono kala no ka ho'olohe lekio? 'O ia ho'i, 'ekolu wale no kala o kahi pepeiao!


Baby, Severe Turbulance is my middle name
E ku'u kumu e, mai hopohopo, ua kapa 'ia ko'u inoa waena, 'o ia 'o Severe...
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posted by ciaraluvsjustin
1.Bring a pillow.Fall asleep[or pretend to]until the last 15 minutes.Wake up,say"Oh Geez,better get cracking"and do some gibberish work.Turn it in a few मिनटों early
2.Get a copy of the exam,run out screaming "Andre Andre I've got the secret documents!!"
3.If it is a math/science exam,answer in essay form.If it is a long answer/essay form answer in numbers या symbols.Be creative.
4.Make paper airplanes out of the exam.Throw them at the instructors left nostril.
5.Talk the entire way through the exam.Read सवालों out loud,debate your जवाब with yourself out loud.If asked to stop, yell out"I'M...
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posted by jblovesme4ever
[]miley cyrus the girl who many of whom look up to but why[
resons to hate her(feel free to add और on comments)

1)[]her music]: she doesnt write it on her own and her newest song untamed wow the part where she says I GO THOUGHT BOYS LIKE MONEY:and the only good song she has is the climb: and that is not saying much!!!:patry in the usa wow that is the s&^%$#@ संगीत vidio i have seen it a while

2)money: the only reson she is here is bcus she wants money: she has to get payed to do chairty events:and she is always just talking about it to

3)she doesnt care about her fans: she may say she doese...
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posted by melcu
1. Sing the बैटमैन theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with फ्रेंड्स in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."

5. If आप have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours द्वारा hooking a camcorder, कैमकॉर्डर to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

9. Start each meal द्वारा conspicuously licking...
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added by SheWolf11
Source: I DO NOT OWN THIS IMAGE
Similar to "30 Things To Do During An Exam." खोजिए for it in this club, it's way funnier. Apologies if this सूची is a little outdated.

50 Ways to Mess With People in a Computer Lab

1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.
2. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 मिनटों & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
3. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that आप can't get the damn thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes, turn it off again, & repeat...
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added by totoyo25
added by tdacrazy6
Source: Tumblr
Example:

There's someone knockin' on my door

There in the shadows, looks like a hand

Come to the rescue now

Once there was a man who decided he knew everything

Life's been so good to me

I went to see what I could find

आप never lived in the streets though आप wish आप had

I'm so sorry, please forgive me

Living in the sixth dimension

Over time I've come to feel

------------------------------------------------------------------

If आप need help या another example for a better understanding, let me know.
added by CokeTheUmbreon
 Yes आप are.
Yes you are.
Good दिन everyone.

I just wanted to quickly write this लेख after thinking about it last night because I couldn't help but to feel the need to say something to everyone who is struggling with life.


Life is tough? yeah it fucking is man!! but guess what if your thoughts are stuck negatively आप going nowhere in progress you'll only sink और and और into depression.


Even if आप feel आप couldn't!!!! get a grip and try a hundred times never give up.

It's impossible to go आगे without one strong step from you.

Somehow you'll manage, learn how to trick your brain into positive thinking it will...
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When I was a teenager, I tried to be a film reviewer. I would write user reviews on a website called Common Sense Media. The problem was that I didn't know what I was talking about, yet I kept लेखन reviews. On Common Sense Media, there was an option for users to rate films on a five-star basis. One तारा, स्टार is the lowest and five stars is the highest.

After seeing my old reviews for the first time in years, I cringed. However, I quickly got over that and got amused over my failed attempts at being a reviewer. I thought I'd share some of my most odd reviews. Keep in mind that I no longer mean...
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