BOY : May I hold your hand?
GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.
GIRL : Say आप प्यार me! Say आप प्यार me!
BOY : आप प्यार me...
GIRL : If we become engaged will आप give me a ring??
BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??
GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple
GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.
BOY : Don't आप ever want to improve??
BOY : I प्यार आप and I could die for you!
GIRL : How soon??
BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!
GIRL : Yes, but would आप stay there??
SHARON : Have आप ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??
TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.
MAN : आप remind me of the sea.
WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
MAN : NO, because आप make me sick.
WIFE : आप tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out of the other.
HUSBAND : आप tell a woman something: It goes in both ears and comes out of the mouth.
MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andy says I'm ugly.What do u think, Peter?
PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.
Girlfriend : "...And are आप sure आप प्यार me and no one else ?"
Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole सूची again yesterday".
Teacher : "Which is और important to us, the sun या the moon?"
Pupil : "The moon".
Teacher : "Why?"
Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need it but the sun gives us light only in the दिन time when we don't need it".
Teacher : "What do आप call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?"
Pupil : "A teacher".
Waiter : "Would आप like your coffee black?"
Customer : "What other रंग do आप have?
Teacher : "Sam, आप talk a lot !"
Sam : "It's a family tradition".
Teacher : "What do आप mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a सड़क, स्ट्रीट hawker, my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".
Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father that I've failed?"
David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared, past year's performance repeated".
Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?"
Student : "Brotherly love".
Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do आप say prayers before eating?"
Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook".
Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering doctor?"
Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records दिखाना that nine out of ten people die of the disease आप have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others all died".
Teacher : "Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?"
One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same दिन and at the same time."
Teacher : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's चेरी tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do आप know why his father didn't punish him ?"
One Student: " Because George still had the axe in is hand."