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posted by lucius_malloy
Answering the सवाल link

Once upon a time, there was a sad little person who had gotten bullied at school. This sad little person had gotten bullied because (s)he was shorter than the others, possibly heavier than them and quite certainly looked young for his/her age, and therefore seemed to be an easy target.
Now, this person was in fact quite intelligent, and was just bursting with snarky retaliations for these bullies, but could never say them for fear of another swirly. So (s)he kept quiet, shouting witty obscenities in his/her head.
One day, however, this person was on the computer at घर when (s)he came across the option to टिप्पणी दे on something या the other -- completely anonymously. And so (s)he let 'er rip, and typed out one of the टिप्पणियाँ that had almost made his/her head explode when (s)he had to restrain his/herself and not say a word. (S)he really went all out, and moved throughout the website, making negative टिप्पणियाँ on anything and everything (s)he could find. It gave him/her a kind of perverse satisfaction, as if (s)he were finally getting back at the bullies for all those years of torment.
Now, the internet is a big place, but trends (aka memes) spread quickly, and some people identified with him/her and decided to start their own brand of cyber-retaliation. The idea spread, and spread, until eventually it got the name trolling, as (s)he once told someone that they're uglier than a mountain troll. This person was, of course, outraged, and responded with the standard first-grade comment: WELL आप ARE A TROLL! (S)he mulled over this a bit, and so was born the term troll, a universal term describing those who partake in unnecessary cyber-bullying/cyber-annoying/cyber-anything. However, even though trollism (as the followers called their 'cult') spread, the anonymous sad little he-she who started the whole thing is still revered as a leader and स्रोत of inspiration. His/her identity is a great secret, and will only be revealed to a potential troll once he या she has proved their worth.
Eventually, (s)he started noticing that a lot of people got annoyed when someone was unable to spell words correctly या grasp even the most basic grammar rules, and so (s)he began to typ lyk dis, something most (sane-ish) people on the internet abhor and avoid as if it were avian flu, या maybe AIDS. The message was sent around to all the mini-trolls via their super-secret TMN (Troll Mail Network), and so began the even now continuing period of typin lyk dis, the period of time in which trolls are stronger than ever before. It is also a time where trolls, encouraged as always द्वारा the anonymous (s)he, try to make their statements and ideas as outrageous and nonsensical as humanly (or rather trolly) possible simply to get a rise out of the sane-ish people on the internets.
This is why, my friends, we must unite in a league of correct spelling and grammar, with a side-order of ideas even remotely in the sane end of the spectrum and do our level best to ignore the trolls, as they only gain momentum from that.
Occasionally telling them, ever-so-politely, to fuck off, however, is perfectly allowed and sometimes even necessary. (Besides, आप know आप want to).

And that is the story of how trolls came to be. I had way too much fun with it. (c) Malloy.
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posted by AlxanderRfan
I don’t know what makes आप so dumb but it really works.

Anybody who told आप to be yourself simply couldn’t have दिया आप worse advice…

Hi there, I’m a human being! What are you?

Shouldn’t आप have a license for being that ugly?

Don’t let आप mind wander – it’s far too small to be let out on its own.

Are आप always this stupid या are आप making a special effort today?

Sure, I’ve seen people like आप before – but I had to pay an admission.

If आप took an IQ test, the results would be negative.

Sure, I’d प्यार to help आप out…now, which way did आप come in?

Brains aren’t everything....
continue reading...
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