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posted by Seanthehedgehog


Song: link
 Blue lines fly along the screen, then the words appear
Blue lines fly along the screen, then the words appear

 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!



Special thanks to AquaMarine6663 for letting me use her three OC's, Aqua Marine, Double Scoop, and Blue Fedora.

Our main character for this story is a बछेड़ा named Ralphie. He will be narrating this story, taking place in Indiana, 1948.

Ponies: *Walking on sidewalk, looking at the snow*
Colts: *Running down सड़क, स्ट्रीट passing a yellow house*

Ah, there it is. My old house. And there I am, with that ugly hat, and that dumb smile. No matter, क्रिस्मस was on it's way. Good old, lovely Christmas.

Later at night.

Band Ponies: *Playing क्रिस्मस संगीत with trombones*

Downtown, everypony was getting prepared to celebrate the glorious holiday.

Band Ponies: *Playing Jingle Bells*
Colts & Fillies: *Walking to a toystore*
Adult Ponies: *Driving cars*
Police Pony: *Controlling traffic, and blowing whistle*
Ponies: *By a आग in a oil drum, and singing* Joy, going down the mountain, where येशु Christ was born!
Band Ponies: *Playing और क्रिस्मस music*
Ralphie: *Standing in front of a toystore with his brother Randy, and other ponies*

Higbee's Toystore had a lot of things inside. Brand new wagons, were gleaming with red paint. Model airplanes were hanging from the ceiling. A toy tank was moving द्वारा itself, due to a wind up motor. Model trains were going around all the other toys. And then, I saw it. The red ryder काबैन, कार्बाइन action two hundred shot range model air rifle. For weeks, I have been scheming a plan to get my hooves on one of those blue steeled beauties. I had tried many tricks that I thought were necessary to get that gun.

Ralphie: *Laying in बिस्तर with magazine*
Mother: *Downstairs in dining room* RALPHIE! RANDY! Get down here in two minutes, and I mean two minutes!
Randy: *Goes to dresser*
Ralphie: *Pushes Randy out of the way*
Randy: Come on Ralphie, I was here first!
Ralphie: Tough. *Looking for a pair of socks*
Randy: *Lightly punching, and kicking Ralphie*
Ralphie: Puts his socks on, and flips through pages of magazine* Cut it out Randy. *Runs to his parent's room* ah. *Finds page with an advertisement featuring the gun he wants, then puts it in his mother's magazine*

My mother would be grabbing her copy of Look Magazine, only to find a Red Ryder Sales Pitch.

Mother: *Preparing breakfast* What are आप पढ़ना about this time?
Dad: Oh, just the news.
Mother: Why don't आप tell me about it? *Looks up at ceiling* Ralphie, on the double!!
Ralphie: *Comes downstairs with Randy*
Dad: Did आप hear about the one where that stallion swallowed a yoyo?
Mother: Where did that happen?
Dad: Some nut did it in Griffith Indiana. Listen to this. What is the name of the Lone Ranger's nephew's human?
Mother: Uh, Victor. His name was Victor.
Dad: How the hell did आप know that?
Mother: Everypony knows that. Is this another one of your silly puzzles?
Dad: Yeah, another one of my silly puzzles. This one could be worth fifty thousand bucks.
Mother: What is it this time?
Dad: Name the great characters in Equestrian literature.
Mother: Victor?
Dad: Yeah.
Mother: The Lone Ranger's nephew's human?

Meanwhile, I was struggling for exactly the right BB gun hint. It had to be firm, but subtle.

Ralphie: Flick says he saw some grizzly bears near Pulaski's कैन्डी store!
Dad, Mother, and Randy: *Staring at Ralphie*

They looked at me like I had lobsters crawling out of my ears. I could tell I was in imminent danger, of giving it away. Casually, I switched tactics.

Ralphie: हे dad.
Dad: Hm?
Ralphie: I'll bet आप can't guess what I got आप for Christmas.
Dad: A new furnace.
Ralphie: *Smiles* That's a good one dad.
Randy: *Laughs*
Mother: Hurry up with breakfast, या you'll be late for school.
Dad: *Checks watch* Holy smokes, I'm late already. *Stands up, and walks away*

Round 1 was over.

Parents: 1
Kids: 0

Then, the inevitable happened.

Mother: Ralphie, what would आप like for Christmas?

Horrified, my mind went blank, and I blurted it out.

Ralphie: I want a red ryder काबैन, कार्बाइन action two hundred shot range model air rifle. *Closes eyes* Oooh.
Mother: No. You'll shoot your eye out.

Oh, it was the classic mother BB gun block, you'll shoot your eye out.

Ralphie: Eh, I was just kidding mom. Even though Flick is getting one. I just decided I wanted some Tinker Toys.

I couldn't believe my ears! Tinker Toys? She wouldn't buy it.

Mother: BB बंदूकों are dangerous. I don't want आप shooting your eye out.
Ralphie: *Glares at the table*
Mother: *Sees Randy refusing to eat his breakfast* Randy, will आप eat? There are starving ponies in China.
Randy: Mhhh.
Ralphie: *Begins to have a fantasy*

Mothers know nothing about creeping marauders burrowing through the snow toward the रसोई, रसोईघर where only आप and आप alone stand between your tiny, huddled family and insensate evil.

In the fantasy, four crooks were sneaking into the backyard.

Crook 4: * Climbing down a tire swing*
Crook 2: *Climbing down a tree*
Ralphie's Family: *Hiding under a table*
Ralphie: *Kicks door open, and holding his gun*
Mother: Save us Ralphie! I just knew those bad ponies would come for us in the end!
Ralphie: Don't worry. As long as I got Old Blue. *Referring to his gun* Well, what do we have here folks?
Dad: Well, we figure it's Black Bart Ralph.
Ralphie: Well, lucky for आप that I got my trusty ol' red ryder carbine. With a compass on the stock. Well, I think I better have a look here folks. *Kneels on रसोई, रसोईघर sink, and looks out window*
Crooks: *Lurking through backyard*
Ralphie: *Pointing gun out window*
Crook 1: Oh no, it's-
Crooks: Old Blue! Oh no!
Crook 1: Seize it boys, the jig is up.
Crook 2: *Climbing up fence*
Ralphie: *Shoots Crook 2 in his butt*
Crook 2: *Falls off fence, and dies*
Crook 4: *Getting on roof of garage*
Ralphie: *Shoots Crook 4*
Crook 4: *Falls on ground, and dies*
Dad: Keep hittin' em! Oh, he's a deadeye, ain't he?
Mother: *Shakes head yes*
Crook 3: *Climbing up a tree*
Ralphie: *Shoots Crook 3*
Crook 3: *Falls on ground, and dies*
Crook 1: Okay Ralph! आप win this round, but we'll be back! *Goes over fence, jumps onto a human, and rides it away from Ralph*
Ralphie: Adios Bart! When आप come back, you'll be pushing up Daisies.
Dead Crooks: *Have their eyes replaced with X's*
Ralphie: And don't आप forget it!
Dad: Well done Ralph!
Mother: आप saved us!
Randy: He's a hero!!

The कल्पना ended

Ralphie: *Sitting at table*
Dad: *Walking into the house*
Dogs: *Following Dad*
Dad: No, get out of here!
Dogs: *Run away*
Dad: *Mumbling about his car, and goes into the kitchen* That hot damn Foals froze up again.

Some ponies are baptists. Others Catholic. My father was a Foalsmobile Stallion.

Dad: *Filling big pitcher with hot water* That son of a कुतिया, मतलबी would freeze up during summer, on the middle of the Equator!
Mother: Little pitcher.
Dad: Thanks honey. *Hears noise* Shh. *Turns off water*

Our furnace started to break down again. द्वारा the entrance to the furnace room, black smoke was seen coming out of the vent.

Dad: Aha, aha! *Points to air vent* It's a clincker!!!!!!!! That blasted stupid furnace dadgummit!
*He walks down a few stairs and falls the rest of the way down* Damn skates! *coughing* Oh, for cripes sake, open up the damper will ya? Who the hell turned it all the way down? AGAIN! Oh, blast it!

My father was one of the most feared furnace fighters in Northern Indiana, but in the heat of battle my father wove a tapestry of obscenities that as far as we know is still hanging in अंतरिक्ष over Lake Michigan.

Soon, me and Randy were getting ready for school. It was like getting ready for deap sea diving.

Mother: *Struggles to put boots on Randy. Then she puts five hats on him, and tries to put the buttons on his jacket*
Ralphie: *Ready for school* Come on mom, we're gonna be late!
Mother: Don't worry Ralph. *Putting long scarf around Randy's head*
Randy: *Cries*

My kid brother looked like a tick about to pop.

Mother: What? *Hears Randy crying* What is it? *Unwraps scarf around Randy's head* What is it?
Randy: I can't हटाइए my front legs!
Mother: *Moves Randy's left front leg, and sees it हटाइए back into the position it was in before* Well, walk on your back legs, and fix your front ones when आप get to school.
Randy: *Crying*
Mother: *Putting scarf back around Randy's head*

As I walked out of the house, black smoke was seen coming out of our chimney, and my old stallion was still shouting while trying to fix the furnace.

Randy: *Walks out of house on his back legs*
Ralphie: *Ignores Randy, and runs toward his friend* Flick! Wait up. *Walks with Flick* So uh.. What are आप doing?
Flick: What does it look like I'm doing, picking goobers?
Schwartz: *Walks with Flick, and Ralphie* हे listen smartass, I asked my old stallion about sticking your tongue to metal surfaces during winter, and he कहा you'd get it stuck.
Flick: Baloney. What would your old stallion know about that stuff?
Schwartz: He knows, because he कहा he saw somepony stick his tongue to a railroad track on a bet. It froze right on, and the आग department had to try to get it off, but they couldn't get it off.
Randy: *Running towards Ralphie* Come on आप guys, wait up for me! *Trips, and falls in snow. He rolls around realizing he can't get up* I can't get up. I CAN'T GET UP!!!!!!!!! HELP!! RALPHIE!!!!
Ralphie, Flick, and Schwartz: *Stop walking, and looking at Randy*
Randy: I CAN'T GET UP RALPHIE!!
Ralphie: Ugh. Come on Flick, wait up for me. *Runs to Randy*
Randy: *Rolling around in snow* I can't get up!
Ralphie: Come on, get up. *Helps Randy get up on his back hooves* You're okay. Come on. You're alright, let's go. *Walks to school with Randy*

When I got to school, one of my classmates got the idea to put on fake teeth as a prank for our teacher, Miss. Shields. He had fake teeth for us all, and we thought it would be a good idea at the time.

Ralphie: *Putting in fake teeth*
Student 3: She's coming, quick.
Students: *Getting to their seats while snickering*
Miss. Shields: Settle down class.
Students: *Stops snickering*
Miss. Shields: *Writing her name on the board* Good morning class.
Students: Good morning Miss. Shields! *Laughing*
Miss. Shields: *Staring at students*
Students: *Putting their heads down so Miss. Shields can't see the fake teeth.*
Miss. Shields: *Knocks on डेस्क twice*
Students: *Walking to डेस्क to hand over fake teeth*
Miss. Shields: *Puts fake teeth into her desk* Now, I want all of आप to open your पुस्तकें to page 32, learning measurements. Twelve inches equals a hoof.

Three hours later was recess. Flick, and Schwartz were at the flag pole, still arguing about the tongue sticking to metal surfaces in cold weather. Everypony gathered around, but it wasn't anything serious.

Flick: Are आप kidding? Stick my tongue to that stupid pole? That's dumb!
Schwartz: That's 'cause आप know it'll stick!
Flick: You're full of it!
Schwartz: Oh yeah?
Flick: Yeah!
Schwartz: Well I double-dog-dare ya!

Now it was serious. A double-dog-dare. What else was there but a "triple dare you"? And then, the coup de grace of all dares, the sinister triple-dog-dare.

Schwartz: I Triple-dog-dare ya!

Schwartz created a slight breach of etiquette द्वारा skipping the triple dare and going right for the throat!

Flick: Alright, alright. *Slowly goes towards the flag pole, and sticks his tongue out*
Schwartz: Well go on smart ass, and do it.
Flick: I'm going, I'm going!

Flick's spine stiffened. His lips curled as his tongue touched the pole.

Flick: This is nuts. *Tries to हटाइए tongue* stuck? Stuck? *Gets scared* Stuck!! STUCK!!!
Students: *Surprised*
Flick: *Crying* STUCK!! STUUUUUCK!!!
Schwartz: Whoa, it really works.
Flick: AHHHHHHH!!!
Students: *Hearing the घंटी, बेल ring, and running back to school*
Flick: Wait! Don't leave me, don't leave me.
Ralphie: But the घंटी, बेल rang.
Schwartz: Well, what do we do?
Ralphie: I don't know, the घंटी, बेल rang. *Runs to school*
Schwartz: *Shrugs, and runs to school*
Flick: Don't leave me! Don't leave me, come back!! *Tries to हटाइए his tongue* Ahhhhh, AHHH!!
Miss. Shields: *Looking at her students in the classroom* Where's Flick? Has anypony seen Flick?

Flick? Flick who?

Miss. Shields: I कहा has anypony seen flick? Ralphie. Do आप know where Flick is?
Ralphie: *Shakes head no*
Miss. Shields: I said, has anypony seen Flick? *Sees student raising hoof* Yes Miss. Pickalo?
Jenny Pickalo: *Pointing out window*
Miss. Shields: *Looks out window, and sees Flick outside with his tongue stuck on the pole* Oh my god! *Runs outside of classroom*
Students: *Getting towards the window, and looks outside*
Ralphie: *Stays at his desk*
Miss. Shields: *Standing अगला to Flick*
आग Ponies: *Arriving in a आग truck*
Student: *Gets excited* Holy cow, it's the आग department.
Ralphie: Oh no.
Police Ponies: *Arrive in a police car*
Students: *Gets very excited* Wow, it's the cops!
आग Ponies: *Talking to Miss. Shields*
Police Ponies: *Talking to Flick*
आग Ponies: *Pulling on Flick, forcing his tongue off of the pole*
Students: *Cheering*

A few मिनटों later, Miss. Shields escorted Flick back into the classroom. She looked a little irritated, while Flick sadly, but calmly returned to his desk.

Miss. Shields: *Looking around classroom* Now. I know that some of आप put him up to this. But he has refused to say who. But those who did it know their blame. *Looks at Ralphie* And I'm sure that the guilt आप feel will be far और worse then any punishment आप may receive.
Ralphie: *Shakes head yes*
Miss. Sheilds: Now. Don't आप feel terrible? Don't आप feel any remorse for what आप have done? Well, that's all I'm going to say about poor Flick. *Walks to her desk*

Adults प्यार to say things like that, but kids knew better. We knew darn well it was always better not to get caught.

Miss. Shields: Now colts, and fillies. I'm going to give आप an assignment. I want आप to write... A theme.
Students: *Complaining*
Miss. Shields: What I want for Christmas.

Aha, the clouds have lifted.

Miss. Shields: And I wanted handed in tomorrow-

I finally saw a light out of the dark cave of doom. I knew Miss. Shields gave me the answer on how to get my BB gun. Somehow.

As I walked back घर with my फ्रेंड्स Flick, and Schwartz (with Randy following behind us) four hooves were seen behind a fence.

Schwartz: Boy. Did आप see how it stuck?
Ralphie: Did it hurt Flick?
Flick: Nah. I barely felt a thing, but these bandages need to stay on my tongue.
Schwartz: आप sure were bawling.
Flick: I never bawled.
Schwartz: Ah, baloney.
??: *Laughing*
Ralphie, Flick, and Schwartz: *Stop walking, and slowly turn around*
Scut: *Sticks his head out from behind fence, and continues laughing*
Ralphie: Scut Farcus.

Scut Farcus! What a rotten name.

Scut: *Pushes Randy onto ground*

We were trapped. There he stood, between us and the alley. Scut Farkus staring out at us with his yellow eyes. He had yellow eyes! So, help me, God! Yellow eyes!

Scut: *Shouts*
Ralphie, Flick, and Schwartz: *Screaming, while running to garage. They start to climb up*
Grover: *Pops up through hole in garage* RAHHH!!
Ralphie, Flick, and Schwartz: *Running back to Scut while screaming*

Grover Dill!! Farcus' creepy little toady. He was mean, rotten. His lips curled over his green teeth! Randy laid there like a slug. It was his only form of self defense.

Scut: *Grabs Schwartz*
Schwartz: AH!!
Ralphie, and Flick: *Standing अगला to Randy*
Scut: Say uncle!
Schwartz: Uncle!!
Scut: A little louder.
Schwartz: Uncle!!
Scut: Louder!
Schwartz: UNCLE!!!!!!!!
Scut: *Pushes Schwartz towards Ralphie*

In our world, आप were either a bully, a toady, या a nameless सूची of victims.

Grover: Alright. Who's next?
Randy: *Stands up*
Grover: Rah!!
Ralphie, Randy, Flick, and Schwartz: *Running away*
Scut: *Laughing*
Grover: *Laughing, and lightly punches Scut*
Scut: *Lightly punches Grover, and laughes*
Grover: *Punches Scut, and laughs*
Scut: *Punches Grover*
Grover: Ow. Man!

In the jungles of kid-dom, the mind changes gears rapidly. Weeks ago, I have sent for a secret decoder pin from Little Orphan Annie.

Ralphie: *Checks mailbox, and sees it empty*

Oh, scumped again. No matter, today I had serious work to do.

Ralphie: *Looks at theme* What I want for Christmas. What I want for क्रिस्मस is an official Red Ryder, काबैन, कार्बाइन action, two-hundred shot range model air राइफल with a compass on the stock. Boy, that's great. I think everypony should get one. They would make a really great क्रिस्मस present. I don't think that a football would make a very good क्रिस्मस present.

Ah, perfection at it's finest.

Dad: *Pulling into driveway, and honks horn nine times. He gets out of the car with a telegram* It's coming tonight tonight tonight!
Dogs: *Arrive*
Dad: No! Get out of here!!
Ralphie: *Looks out bedroom window*

Aha, the bumpus hounds. Da da da da, da da! Our hillbilly neighbors had at least seven hundred, and eighty five smelly hound dogs.

Dogs: *Walking through house*
Dad: No! Get of here!! हे Bumpuses, come get your कुत्ता here!!!!
Dogs: *Getting out of house*
Dad: हे honey, get over here!
Ralphie: *Walks downstairs*
Mother: *Arrives* What? What? What is it?
Dad: A major prize, a major prize! I won, I won, I won! Look at this. *Shows telegram* Western Union Telegram. Tonight! Tonight! It's coming Tonight! Tonight! Tonight! Tonight! Hot Damn, Tonight!
Mother: What does this mean here?
Dad: It means it's coming tonight. *Hears scratching noise at door. He goes to it, and opens it* Go on, get out of here आप dogs! *Closes door on dog's ear*
Dog: *Whimpering loudly*
Dad: आप know what it could be? It could be the fifty thousand bucks I mentioned earlier today. *Opens door*
Dog: *Walks away*
Dad: Serves आप right आप smelly bugger! *Closes door* Or, it could be a bowling alley. I always wanted one of those!
Mother: How are they gonna deliver a bowling alley here द्वारा tonight?
Dad: Well... आप know I was just teasing. I wasn't really expecting a bowling alley.. *Pats Ralphie on the shoulder* What do आप say we eat dinner? I'm starving.
Ralphie: *Shakes head yes*

Every family has a टट्टू that won't eat. My little brother had not eaten voluntarily in over three years.

Mother: Oh Randy! Don't play with your food, eat it!
Randy: Oh jeez.
Mother: Starving ponies would be happy to have that.
Dad: Can I have some और red cabbage?
Mother: *Goes to get red cabbage*
Dad: *Angry at Randy* आप stop playing with your food, या I'll give आप something to cry about.
Ralphie: Mom, when you're done getting the red cabbage for dad, may I please have some?
Randy: Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.
Dad: All right, I'll get that kid to eat. Where's my screw driver and my plumber's helper? I'll open up his mouth and I'll shove it in.

My mother had a और subtle approach.

Mother: Randy. How do the little piggies?
Randy: *Snorting like a pig*
Mother: *Smiles* That's right, oink oink. Now दिखाना me how they eat. *Points to Randy's dinner* This is your trough, दिखाना me how the little piggies eat. Be a good colt, दिखाना mommy how the piggies eat.
Randy: *Stuffs his face into the dinner, and eats while making pig noises*
Mother: *Laughing*
Ralphie: *Looks away*
Randy: *Continues eating with his face in the dinner*
Mother: My!! *Laughing*
Dad: *Sees Randy eating like a pig* Ugh. *Reads newspaper*
Mother: Mommy's little piggy! *Laughing*
Randy: *Laughing*
Dad: *Hears five knocks on the door*
Randy: *Finishes eating dinner, then hears four knocks on the door*

We all sat down as if we were trapped in ice. Then, after five और knocks, we ran to the door.

Delivery Pony: *Knocks on door five times*
Dad: *Opens door* Yeah?
Delivery Pony: आप Bob Parker?
Dad: Yeah, yeah.
Delivery Pony: *Holding clipboard with paper on it* Sign here please.
Dad: *Signing paper* What's in it?
Delivery Pony: I don't know.
Dad: What's in it?
Delivery Pony: *Shrugs*
Dad: *Finishes signing paper* Here.
Delivery Pony: *Takes paper* Okay boys, bring it in.
Delivery Ponies: *Pushing lift with big box on it*
Mother: *Gets nervous*
Dad: Watch the lady.
Delivery Ponies: *Puts box on ground* Here आप are.
Dad: Yeah, thanks a lot. Merry christmas.
Delivery Ponies: *Leaving*
Dad: Do आप know what could be in here?
Mother: It could be anything.
Dad: Ralph, get my hammer, and crowbar.
Ralphie: I got it. *Runs to get hammer, and crowbar*
Dad: *Looks at the word fragile* Ah. Fra-gee-le. It must be Italian.
Mother: No, I think that says fragile honey.
Dad: Oh yeah.
Ralphie: *Returns with hammer, and crowbar*
Dad: Thanks. *Puts crowbar under lid of box, and hits it with hammer* Boy. They really put this lid on tight. *Gets lid off*
Mother: *Looks at straws in box*
Dad: There could be anything in there!
Mother: Maybe they forgot.
Dad: They couldn't have. It's gotta be in there! *Throwing straws out of box, and finds a mare's leg* Do आप know what this is?
Mother: No..
Dad: Well. It's a leg.
Mother: Yes it's a leg, but what's it supposed to be?
Dad: I dunno, it could be a statue.
Ralphie: *Feeling the mare's leg* Yeah, a statue.
Mother: Ralphie. *Puts his hoof off of the statue*

My mother was trying to insinuate herself between us and the statue.

Dad: *Gets a lampshade* आप know what this is?! *Puts lampshade on mare's leg* This is a lamp! I know the perfect spot for this. Right in front of the living room window! *Goes to put lamp in front of living room window*
Mother: Ooh, *Really nervous* Ah! Uh! Ummm.
Dad: *Puts lamp between plants, and plugs in the lamp. However, a fuse goes out for two seconds*
Mother: AH!
Ralphie: Whoa.
Dad: *Blows on plugs, and taps it twice, causing sparks to fall*
Mother: Honey?
Dad: It's alright dear, it's alright. आप know, I guess it's only, one too many. *Plugs lamp in again*

The snap of a few sparks, a quick whiff of ozone, and the lamp blazed forth in unparalleled glory.

Dad: Oh, look at that! Will आप look at that? Isn't that glorious? It's... it's... it's indescribably beautiful! It reminds me of the Fourth of July! Turn off all the lights, I wanna see what it looks like outside.
Ralphie: I'll go get the dining room. *Runs to turn off dining room lights*
Dad: *Runs outside*
Mother: Randy. *Cleans his face from dinner*
Dad: *Runs to street, and looks at lamp. He points to the right* हटाइए it that way to the right!
Mother: *Points to the right*
Dad: That's right. हटाइए it that way!
Mother: *Slowly moves lamp to the right*
Dad: Stop right there! That's perfect!
टट्टू 64: हे Parker. What is that?
Dad: Don't bother Zudock. Can't आप see I'm busy here?
टट्टू 64: Yeah, I know, but what is that?
Dad: It's a major award. I won it.

और ponies started to gather around when they heard the old stallion talking about his major award.

टट्टू 64: A major award? Shucks I know that, it looks like a lamp.
Dad: Well of course it's a lamp आप nincompoop, but it's also a major award. I won it.
टट्टू 64: Damn hell. आप कहा आप won it?
Dad: That's right.

The lamp could be seen all over Cleveland Street.

Dad: Oh आप should see what it looks like from out here!
Ralphie: *Touching the lamp*

My mother still trying to prevent us from enjoying it.

Mother: Isn't it about time for somepony's प्रिय radio program?
Ralphie: Yeah.

Holy smokes, it was 6:45. Only one thing could drag me away from electric sex gleaming out the window.

Ralphie: *Turns on radio, and sits अगला to Randy*

Kids, it's Little Orphan Annie! Brought to आप द्वारा Rich Creamy Chocolaty Ovaltine. I could still taste it.

Dad: *Walking back to house*
Mother: *Turns lamp off*
Dad: *Sees lamp off* Hey, आप turned the lamp off!

2 B Continued
posted by SomeoneButNoone
स्लैश - Shit...
Guard - I tell आप what happend. Those girls got nuts and.
Slash - Shut up.


-I thought he will go for Fluttershy अगला to frame RD but. In the end I was at fault. I followed logic of the type killing. Twilight was universal she could kill anyone. Rarity was a bait out. And eart टट्टू killed eart pony. Following that logic the pegasuses would kill each orther but using a gun in prison.-

Ace - So AppleJack died because of being brutally beaten up द्वारा Twilight wich is bullshit because it's clear she got shot.
Slash - लोमड़ी, फॉक्स is in the hurry. Hm..
Ace - So... What do आप want to do.
Slash - Investigate........
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
At the hospital, Tim, and Julia went to see Dan. He was laying down in a bed, and had an empty tray in front of him.

Tim: Looks like आप just finished lunch.
Julia: How is everything here?
Dan: Fine.
Tim: Who were आप pursuing?
Dan: Two ponies. I don't know what they look like, but I did see horns on both their heads, so they're both unicorns.
Julia: What kind of car did they have?
Dan: An old sports car, a yellow AMC Matador.
Tim: Matador?
Julia: Those aren't common.
Dan: And the license plate was C53-SDS.
Tim: Thanks Dan. We'll tell the Captain.

At the station, Captain Jefferson was working on papers...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Stargazer's car
Stargazer's car
Song: link

The sun was rising in Gran Turismo, and the sky was a wonderful shade of orange.

Stargazer: *Driving his car at 65 miles an hour*
Black Tuesday: You're gonna get the cops after us before we even meet up with the others.
Stargazer: Don't worry. The cops won't catch us in this fine machine.

A brand new 300 turned onto the road behind them.

Stargazer: Either that's the टट्टू racing us, या it's an undercover cop.
Black Tuesday: Undercover?
Stargazer: Oh yes. The police here have plenty of undercover police cars. Both 300's, and Impalas, and they're all brand new. However, as I कहा earlier, they...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this episode.

Tim: Those two keep getting away from us Captain. We need to expand our jurisdiction to Canterlot.
Captain Jefferson: Do आप know how difficult that is?
Tim: I understand, but when the suspects get out of Gran Turismo, neither the State Troopers, या CHP can get prepared in time.

---

Stargazer: *Holding $500 in front of Black Tuesday* Look at all of this money.
Black Tuesday: That's not a lot.
Stargazer: Maybe so, but if we keep doing what we just did, we'll get और of this.

---

Toby: The stallions know where to go, and when.
Tim: Why don't we use that to our advantage?...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: February 17, 1963
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
Time: 10:09 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Orion was on his way back to Cheyenne from Denver, after delivering the Iron Ore, and steel. Now the freight cars on his train are empty.

Orion: The adventure never seems to end for those freight cars. They just keep going all over the place, and.. What the fuck am I talking about?
Audience: *Laughing*
Orion: *Going down Sherman Hill* Okay, time for my plan.
Mirage: *Backing three diesels onto a freight train*
Dan: *Walking to Mirage's train*
Mike: Where are आप two heading?
Dan: Westbound, to Greeley.
Mirage:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Song (Start at 1:39): link

Blue: *Enters Gran Turismo*
State Trooper Pony: All units, State Troopers, and Gran Turismo Police Department, Blue Fedora, and Aqua Marine are at it again. Southbound, black Pontiac, Ida, 2, 4, Edward, King, Sam.
Two Undercover Police Ponies: *Driving Impalas*
Undercover Police Pony: Ten-4, we're joining the pursuit.
Tim: *Next to Julia as she drives the M4* GT24 to units chasing Blue, and Aqua, what's your location?
State Trooper Pony: Main Street.
Julia: *Drives*
Tim: Ten-4, joining pursuit from Local Consideration.
Aqua: *Holding a Glock pistol* Turn left at that intersection....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Julia was driving the M4 Police car, patrolling the Round Freeway, with Tim sitting अगला to her.

Tim: Did Dan tell आप the bad news?
Julia: Dan hasn't spoken to me in two days. What happened?
Tim: He, and his partners were pulled out of the Blue Fedora, and Aqua Marine case.
Julia: They must be upset about it.
Tim: Yeah. It was because of something Andy did. He shot a टट्टू when he wasn't supposed to.
Julia: Why? What was the other टट्टू doing?
Tim: He was just visiting a friend, and was taking some things with him. Some apples, a carrot, and he borrowed a PS2 controller, because his wasn't working....
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Void - आप wanted to meet me.
Dan - Yes. Do आप know what holds Valkyries core?
Void - Same as old PCS is SLS.
Dan - Saftey Lock System... So सुरक्षित that it can be open. We called it overlock.
Void - So?
Dan - Use it too long and आप simply die.

---
???
---
Nyx - Hmmm... आप smell it. The storm is coming.
Blaze - Yes *looks over him* Butyful.
Nyx - So my dear. *looks in he eyes* It's time to interrupt their fun event.


---
operation shadow raid
---

Dan - Phase 3 end. Phase 4.
Void - Let-
Blaze - Well well well.
-Blaze shows in same Valkyrie but black and red colored-
Blaze - *shoots something to the ground as it...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: February 14, 1963
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
Time: 9:46 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Ponies: *Listening to the loudspeaker at the station*
Loudspeaker Pony: Attention all passengers, happy Valentines Day. The अगला train arriving is The City Of Denver. It's really big, so make sure it doesn't hit you.
Audience: *Laughing*
Hawkeye: *Kissing Metal Gloss as he drives a freight train out of the yard*
Metal Gloss: I feel so warm.
Hawkeye: Your face is red. Perhaps it's something I did.
Metal Gloss: Oh, no the heater is too high. *Lowers the temperature on the heater*
Audience: *Laughing*

Snowflake...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: February 9, 1963
Location: Cheyenne Wyoming
Time: 8:16 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Pete: *In his office* Why, are we back here? Go follow Stylo, I know what he's doing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Pete: I wish him good luck too.

Song: link

Two days later at a bar

Stylo: *Drunk, resting his head on the counter in front of him* Oh fuck!!!
Pony 85: *Arrives* Hey.
Stylo: *Picks up his head, and looks at the टट्टू to his right*
Pony 85: I've heard of you.
Stylo: I'm sure आप have, now if आप don't mind, I'm trying to have a hangover.
Audience: *Laughing*
Pony 85: Somepony named Pierce Hawkins told me about you....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Round 17 is beginning

Rainbow Dash: Okay, here's what we're going to do. *Loses connection*

Rainbow Dash has left the game

Pinkie Pie: I like that idea. Let's do nothing.
Twilight: She rost connection. It's up to us.
Pinkie Pie: Right आप are Twilight. Let's go use the teleporter.

As they were running, twelve zombies started to chase them.

Twilight: *Throws a monkey*
Monkey: That tickles. *Lands between the horde of zombies*
Zombies: *Staying around the monkey*
Monkey: *Kills the zombies* Better luck अगला time zombies.
Twilight: आप give me great honor.
Pinkie Pie: *Turns on the teleporter, and plants...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
"They कहा to colonise the orther world. Noone knew it would end with millions of dead. Officials say that they can be heated as new generation of PCS come out under new name : Valkyries. These one are bigger, in size of typical Ponyville building and are created on look of human. Ponies enlist to army to take on monsters on orther side of gate, where -60 C cold wildness meet them."

Dan - आप will not fall back from battlefield!


SomeoneButNoone presents.

Dan - Squadron V-2 are present :

The newest project.

Dan - V-1.1 Captain-Liberator Void V-1.2 सेकंड Lieutenant Snowflake.

And the main project...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Round 8 is beginning

Rainbow Dash: *Sees a green light on the map* The mystery box is on the bottom left portion of this map.
Applejack: What are we waitin' for? Let's buy some guns.

Lead द्वारा इंद्रधनुष Dash, the ponies ran up the aisle, heading towards the room they started in, and turned right, to buy the अगला room.

Pinkie Pie: Okay, time for one of आप to buy the door now.
Applejack: No Pinkie, आप do it. आप have enough points to buy both this door, and a gun from the mystery box.
Pinkie Pie: Do not argue with your leader, and buy the door! One of you!
Rainbow Dash: I'll be the mature pony, and buy...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
>>>rebooting system
...
...
...
>>>>Error<<<<<

------
Equestrian Labs.
00:05
---
Steven - *reads papers* Mhm... I see... Alright *drops paper* Alright... Dan left आप unfinished. Time to polish you.

---
1 घंटा later*
---
Steven - OK
Scientist #1 - *gives half mechanic दिल to Steven*
Steven - *puts दिल inside* आप will feel great... And be allowed to use over-trance.
Scientist #2 - We are ready for additional repairments.
Steven - Splendid! Let's start right away!

--
4 hours later
--
Void - *wakes up* where.. I am?
Steven - Welcome! आप were dead for one year.
Void - Dead......
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: EQD, joyreactor
posted by SomeoneButNoone
Joel - आप guys know there is way to clear my account. Pilot!
Pilot - Aye?
Joel - To FBI HQ!
Pilot - Yes sir.
Joel - *wears Kevlar* Those prison clothes are uncomfortable.
Steven - What's the plan?
Damien - Yeah...
Joel - Arson. We burn the hall and take server with my data and break it.
Damien - Sounds easy.
Joel - Oi... Nothing is easy...


---
After action - safehouse
---
Joel - Woo good to be free.
Damien - आप talk like आप were there for ages but it wasn't even 12 hours.
Steven - Heh...
Joel - Give me a break..

Dimitri - Good job boys. Your debts were paid... Good luck in your life!
FI - Well guys first...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Dimitri - Do आप liked the mares I sender to you? They didn't wanted it but with some money... आप guys live like kings in the penthouse I bought for you. But it's action time. Time to work on the work. I left आप some heavy armor to wear. आप gonna go with truck as watch dogs. If anyone will try to steal it kill them. If police gonna check the truck kill them. Money need some laundry so आप know. Anyway that's pretty much this.
FI - Heard the old pony. Sit there and don't हटाइए an inch and everything will be OKAY.


Damien - Eh it takes long to get there.
Steven - Yeah...
Joel - हे new how is it...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
FI - Gentelmans we will हटाइए onto bigger shit from now.


Hour : 06:28


FI - My old informator need help, his name is Dimitri, he have Russian Mob on territories of Ponyville and Canterlot, we are doing job for him.



Location : Canterlot


FI - Some Ponies started stealing his cocaine and use it in their little ghetto. Dimitri want आप to "pay them a visit" and take what his. He will reward us with money. He trusts us so don't screw it up. No police - only आप and junkies. Easy right? And it gives us enterance into Canterlot affairs.



Action Start



*Van appears at ghetto*
Junkie - What the hell.. Cops or...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
It was 8:57 PM when Tim arrived at the green house अगला to the train station. There, he would visit Brielle.

Tim: *Walks to the front door* I wonder how she's able to answer the door. *Rings the door bell*

The whole house vibrated from the घंटी, बेल being rung.

Tim: Guess that जवाब my question.
Brielle: *Opens the door while holding a piece of paper that says hello*

Song (Start at 0:15): link

Meanwhile on Malpaso Avenue, disaster struck

Pony: *Driving a Mitsubishi in the dark*
Deer: *Runs into the road*
Pony: *Brakes, but hits the deer*
Honda Pony: *Hits the Mitsubishi*
Volkswagen Pony: *Crashes...
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Saten and Spike: Starlight Glimmer?

Twilight: I was sure I saw her, boys. But when I looked again, she was gone! I'm just worried what she could be up

Spike: Nothing good, I bet. I heard she wasn't very happy the last time आप saw.

Saten: (sarcastically) आप don't say.

Twilight: Look, forcing everybody in her village to have the same cutie mark wasn't right. We had to do something!

Saten: और like आप had to do something.. I loved her town.

Twilight: (annoyed) No आप didn't.. आप just thought she was hot.

Saten: ... Still do.

Twilight: Well, आप won't be thinking that after she tries to kill you.

Saten:...
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