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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tom continued insulting politicians, much to the delight of his audience.

Tom: Presidential candidates are always a good target for comedians to make fun of, but आप know what another लोकप्रिय target is? Black Lives Matter.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Many black ponies are accusing millions of ponies of the Caucasian race, for something only one police officer did in the Midwest!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Who's the racist now आप assholes?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And do आप really think that every single Caucasian hates blacks?! When did we time travel back to the 18th Century?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Even the majority of black ponies believe that the Black Lives Matter movement is a waste of time! This group also wants to do something else that's a waste of time. Defund the police departments!
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: If आप do that, that's a surefire way to increase crime! Take all the power away from the police so that they can't protect the innocent victims that get murdered द्वारा violent protestors who want rights which they already have!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: All they want is equal rights. But hey...YOU ALREADY GOT 'EM!!!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: What's worse is that they not only want to defund the police, they want to kill them. Well guess what BLM? Did आप know that some black ponies also work for the police?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: This plan is so fucking stupid! They're going to kill other black ponies, just to give themselves extra rights!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And if there's anypony that's not convinced, I suggest आप stop watching the news, and take a trip to the library.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: No one ever does that anymore. Now they're focused on generic news, and Call Of Duty!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: The only पढ़ना ponies do nowadays are when they receive text messages, and e-mails.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: That's if they have actual words, and not emojis.
Crowd: *Laughing, and clapping*
Tom: Does anyone else feel like we have too many emoji's to keep track of?
Crowd: Yeah!
Tom: It first started off as a bunch of yellow faces. Now we have skateboards, skyscrapers, traffic signs, traffic lights, trains, planes, and automobiles.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: That was a good movie द्वारा the way, but there are also some emojis that are fucked up, and unnecessary. First one being a cat. Why are we so attracted to these things?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It's bad enough that we're getting flooded with cat वीडियो on social media, we don't need a fucking emoji of one!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Up अगला is the poop emoji!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: It's a pile of poop made to look like चॉकलेट पुडिंग, हलवा with a smiley face.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: With the exception of rednecks, no one is interested in looking at their own feces! Let alone, one with a smiley face!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Finally, there's the human hands. Ponies don't even have hands, why are we using them as emoji's?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: The only one I like to use is the middle finger!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Send it to the nincompoops who thought it was a good idea to create...The Emoji Movie.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: These things are so लोकप्रिय they had to make a movie about it. And of course being a modern movie, it was only created to follow a trend, and make money. Not to tell a good story like it's supposed to.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: I am glad that's not the case with all of the modern movies, but the fact that we've been doing this since 2006 is unacceptable.
Crowd: *Laughing*

2 B Continued
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: February 17, 1960
Location: Ogden Utah
Time: 5:54 PM
Railroad: Southern Pacific

The sun was setting, as Anthony sat on the station platform with Ryan, and Donut, waiting for their अगला assignments.

Michael: *Storms out of the station, and looks at Anthony* आप cause an accident on my line, and don't tell me anything?!!?
Anthony: Roger कहा he was going to tell you. He didn't check the coupling between our train, and engines.
Michael: He कहा आप were to check them! I don't know if this is going to be common with आप now, but if आप keep forgetting to do your work, I'll have आप fired!...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
The Canterlot Highway Patrol is a very busy organization, protecting everyone on, and around the highways of Canterlot. Of course, there are some ponies that despise them, and call these police ponies Chips, या chippies for short.

Jon Baker, and Frank Poncherello, two CHP officers, were riding Harley Davidson मोटरसाइकल on one of the highways.

Jon: *Riding his motorcycle अगला to Frank* It sure is a nice day.
Frank: Not just with the weather, but with the activity. Things are going easy for us.

A blue GT500 passed them going over 80.

Jon: *Rides his motorcycle after the car*
Frank: *Following...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic इंद्रधनुष as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy
Sean as Chief Wild Eagle
and Sonic as Crazy Cat

It was a regular दिन at the fort. Wrangler Jane walked into Captain Parmenter's office.

Captain Parmenter: *Signing papers, but when he sees Jane, he drops...
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As I managed to escape. The other two continued fighting.

Trixie continued trying to stab her, AppleBloom, at one point, managed to knee her in the stomach, making her bend over in pain.

AppleBloom found the bat and hit Trixie really hard, saying it was for Sweetie Belle.

But Trixie was somehow able dodged all her other swings.

Trixie punched her in the stomach, but AppleBloom ignored the pain as well.

Trixie attempted to stab AppleBloom but she dodged it.

Ten मिनटों of fighting, later:

AppleBloom was clearly growing और tired.

At one point, Trixie punched her really hard on the side of her the head....
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: August 7, 1959
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 8:38 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Jeff went into Pete's office at the station.

Jeff: आप wanted to see me sir?
Pete: Yes. Let me ask आप a question. What do आप know about the Lehigh Valley Railroad?
Jeff: Not much. All I know about it is that it's a short railway in the east coast. Why are आप asking me about it?
Pete: There's a shortage of track repairers in Neigh Jersey. You'll be taking an airplane from this city into Jersey City. From there, a stallion with a sign of both the Union Pacific, and Lehigh Valley logo will be there waiting...
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I ran out of the कपकेक factory, and back to where my scooter was. Unfortunately, it wasn't there.

Scootaloo: Hey! What the- *Sees another टट्टू riding her scooter* Bring that back here!!
Pony on Scootaloo's Scooter: Nope!!
Scootaloo: if i had fingers-
Guards: Stop right there!
Scootaloo: *Running towards the the down slope on the mountain* इंद्रधनुष Dash कहा there would be a lot of snow, so I'll ski down here to escape them.
Pony: *Getting ready to ski down the hill* Ah. What a glorious दिन for-
Scootaloo: *Punches the pony, and steals his skis*
Pony: getting.. stuff.. stolen from me.
Guard...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, EQD
posted by Seanthehedgehog
 A Lunicorn Continental, the My Little टट्टू version of a Lincoln.
A Lunicorn Continental, the My Little Pony version of a Lincoln.
Gordon, and Case पटाखा, पटाखे got in a black Lunicorn Continental. They were heading to the airport to deliver cocaine.

Gordon: The airport shouldn't be far away. Turn on the radio if you'd like.
Case Cracker: *turns on radio and begins to खोजिए for a station* Sounds like a lotta static.
Gordon: Maybe because this car is old. *Stops at red light* Let me try. *turns onto 98.1* This radio station has a lot of rock & roll, but right now they're playing a commercial.
Announcer: Behold, the best cars आप could ever ask for, from Chevronet. Chevronet has made many enjoyable cars, from the Belair to...
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: joyreactor, facebook, deviantart
added by NocturnalMirage
Source: joyreactor, facebook, deviantart
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Previously, when इंद्रधनुष Dash, and her फ्रेंड्स found the treasure, they also noticed their ship was missing. When the diamond कुत्ता arrived, they चुरा लिया the ship.

Rainbow Dash: *Runs onto the समुद्र तट with her friends*
Leaf Pile: This is not good.
Erik: What are we going to do?
Rainbow Dash: I think I know what we can do. Me, and Leaf Pile will fly onto the ship, and आप यूनिकॉर्न can teleport yourselves, as well as our earth ponies, and we fight whoever चुरा लिया our ship.
Applejack: If only I wasn't an earth pony.
Max: Be careful what आप wish for.
Erik: Hey, I don't mind not having wings, या a horn....
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SCENE 1:
Saten: *drunkily* H हे Applejack
AppleJack: Are ya drunk या something?
Saten: *dizzily* No I'm no- A little
AppleJack: *giggles* Y'all really need some sort of intervention. Ah mean this is the third time this week.
(Suddenly Saten Twist squeeze hugged her, even though it was clear बनाया गया, एपलजैक, मौजमस्ती wasn't completely comfortable with it.)
Saten: I I प्यार आप Applejack. Let's grow old together in everyway. (demonic voice) EVERY-WAY!
AppleJack *trying to push him off her*: Yeah.. About that.. Look. We only been on 'one' date. It didn't even end well,. But since then. Ya showed up at my house four...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
इंद्रधनुष Dash, Rarity, and बनाया गया, एपलजैक, मौजमस्ती got to the island with the five ponies on the pirate ship. They walked off the ship after putting down the anchor, and were on the island.

Leaf Pile: We're here. Now let's get that pirate map, and look for the treasure.
Rarity: *Realizes something* Oh, about the treasure map.
Leaf Pile: Yes Rarity?
Rarity: Remember when we were dumping Hungry's body over the edge, and into the ocean?
Erik: आप didn't leave the map with her.
Larry: Did you?
Rarity: Well, आप see... Yes.
Donut: Darn it!
Leaf Pile: Now how are we supposed to find the treasure?!
Rainbow Dash: Stay...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
अगला morning, Joe arrived at his job late.

Boss: *Watching workers unload boxes from a small freight train*
Worker: That's the last one sir.
Boss: Good work.
Worker: Okay man, we got all the boxes out of your train.
Engineer: Thanks. *Rings घंटी, बेल on his locomotive as he drives the train away from the depot*
Joe: *Arrives* Sir, I'm sorry for arriving late.
Boss: Don't worry about it. I got something to tell you.
Joe: What?
Boss: Important cargo is coming here from St. Foalis द्वारा helicopter.
Joe: Why is it coming all the way from there?
Boss: No one else would send it.
Joe: What is it anyway?
Boss:...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
In St. Foalis, two ponies climbed into a helicopter on चोटी, शीर्ष of a building.

Orion: *Sits in pilot's seat*
Snowflake: *Sits अगला to Orion*
Pony: *Gives manifest to Orion* आप two need to get some oil to a trucking depot in Trenton Neigh Jersey.
Orion: All the way in Neigh Jersey? What for?
Pony: It's needed द्वारा a town द्वारा there, and we're the closest company that can get it to them. Better start flying.
Orion: *Starts up helicopter*
Snowflake: Why did I let आप talk me into this?
Orion: Because it's a fun job.
Snowflake: We're pegasi. We don't need to fly these things.
Orion: Well I like it. *Gets...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Theme Song: link

Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on सड़क, स्ट्रीट corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing अगला to Double Scoop*
Tom: और ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands अगला to...
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Unfortantely the Cusiders ran into a dead end, and Big Mac was finally able to do whatever the hell it was he was planning to do towards them.
But before he could the shotgun was blown out of his hooves, द्वारा an unnamed police pony.
Ditto: (also revealing himself). (looks at the police pony) Not bad kid, now keep that gun at him, take no chances.
Police pony: Yes Chief Ditto (keeps aiming the M1911 pistol at Big Mac).
Ditto: (approaches Big Mac).
Scootaloo: (excitedly) Ditto! It's me!
Ditto: I see that.. But now's not the the time sweetie.
Scootaloo: Fair enough.
Ditto: (dramatic tone) Big Macintose,...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: August 27, 1958
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 6:57 PM
Railroad: Union Pacific

After buying some uneccesary military equipment, Gordon was getting ready to head into FBI Headquarters to rescue Coffee Creme.

Gordon: *Tying shoelaces on his boots, but he doesn't know how to tie shoelaces, and stops* Alright. Now... *Puts on military shirt, helmet, then grabs an M14 rifle* oh, almost forgot. *Grabs बेल्ट of grenades. He grabs one of the grenades, and plays around with it, but acidentally pulls out the pin* Ah! *Puts pin back in grenade* thank goodness.

Meanwhile in the yards.

Stylo: Where...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Date: August 27, 1958
Location: Cheyenne, Wyoming
Time: 8:41 AM
Railroad: Union Pacific

Gordon returned to Chicagoat. He was glad to be back, but still missed Coffee Creme.

Gordon: *Waits for his train to stop, then gets out on the platform*
Pete: *Walks out of station* Welcome back Gordon.
Gordon: Thank आप sir. It's great to be back. Can I talk to आप in my office?
Pete: आप mean my office.
Gordon: That's what I said.
Pete: Uh, alright.

They walked into Pete's office.

Pete: What's going on?
Gordon: Remember when I called आप yesterday?
Pete: Yeah. What about it?
Gordon: Right after I hung up,...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
The Classroom

Starring Snow Wonder as Ms. Schultz..............................

Tom: Hold it!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: We're not doing this skit yet until later. Get your shit together everypony!
Audience: *Laughing*

The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic इंद्रधनुष as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as...
continue reading...