Here are my सूची of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let आप know now i got alot of these from the यूट्यूब channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything या eating anything आप might spit it या something.)
#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.
#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)
#3 Why was the झाड़ू late to work?
It overswept!
#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the खाड़ी, बे they'd be bagels.
#5 What's Michelle Obama's प्रिय vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)
#6 Why does the मशरूम have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)
#7 What do आप call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)
#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
#9 What do आप call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!
#10 How do आप make an octopus giggle ten times?
आप give him ten-tickles (tenticles)
#11 How do आप make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!
#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!
#13 What's a chicken's प्रिय composer?
Bach!
#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between आप and me man, something smells." (Your nose)
#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."
#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."
#17 Why can't आप hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)
#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher कहा it was a piece of cake.
#19 Why did the टमाटर blush?
It saw the सलाद dressing.
#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)
#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)
#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.
#23 How do आप know if it's raining बिल्ली and dogs?
आप step in a poodle (puddle)
#24 How do आप know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)
#25 How do आप get पिकाचू on a bus?
आप पोकेमोन (pok 'em on)
#26 Why can't आप dress with पिकाचू in the room?
He'll पिकाचू (peek at you)
#27 What do आप call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)
#28 How do get holy water?
आप boil the hell out of it!
#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD
#30 Why didn't the skeleton पार करना, क्रॉस the road?
He didn't have the guts to.
#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)
#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)
#33 What do आप call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator
#34 What's गुलाबी and fluffy?
गुलाबी fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
गुलाबी fluff holding it's breath.
#35 What happens when आप drink 7 coca colas?
आप burp 7up
#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.
#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!
#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.
#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)
#40 what did the मछली say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!
#41 Why can't आप trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)
Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope आप liked them. Make sure आप check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
(Make sure your not drinking anything या eating anything आप might spit it या something.)
#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.
#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)
#3 Why was the झाड़ू late to work?
It overswept!
#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the खाड़ी, बे they'd be bagels.
#5 What's Michelle Obama's प्रिय vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)
#6 Why does the मशरूम have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)
#7 What do आप call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)
#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
#9 What do आप call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!
#10 How do आप make an octopus giggle ten times?
आप give him ten-tickles (tenticles)
#11 How do आप make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!
#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!
#13 What's a chicken's प्रिय composer?
Bach!
#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between आप and me man, something smells." (Your nose)
#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."
#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."
#17 Why can't आप hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)
#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher कहा it was a piece of cake.
#19 Why did the टमाटर blush?
It saw the सलाद dressing.
#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)
#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)
#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.
#23 How do आप know if it's raining बिल्ली and dogs?
आप step in a poodle (puddle)
#24 How do आप know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)
#25 How do आप get पिकाचू on a bus?
आप पोकेमोन (pok 'em on)
#26 Why can't आप dress with पिकाचू in the room?
He'll पिकाचू (peek at you)
#27 What do आप call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)
#28 How do get holy water?
आप boil the hell out of it!
#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD
#30 Why didn't the skeleton पार करना, क्रॉस the road?
He didn't have the guts to.
#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)
#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)
#33 What do आप call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator
#34 What's गुलाबी and fluffy?
गुलाबी fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
गुलाबी fluff holding it's breath.
#35 What happens when आप drink 7 coca colas?
आप burp 7up
#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.
#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!
#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.
#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)
#40 what did the मछली say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!
#41 Why can't आप trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)
Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope आप liked them. Make sure आप check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
PewDiePie
Hey..
So,
Remember me? Of course आप don't- this is a new account. *smacks self*
Anyway, I used to be LUV_4_BIEBER. *shudders* Remember me now? Still no? Okay..
ANYPENIS, I came back to this site a few nights पूर्व and went "Damn I miss this place!" Of course probably NONE if the people I knew are still here, but who cares- I can make new friends!
(that was a completely failed attempt at being sociable)
So I was looking back at my old account and holy fucking dickface I was the biggest idiot ever. Just- wow. Firer me apologizes for past me's illiterate लेखन skills, mary-sueishess, and generally being an annoying twat >.<
I guess this is a welcome back post? और like a "please dear god take me back" post :p
BUT HAY.
So,
Remember me? Of course आप don't- this is a new account. *smacks self*
Anyway, I used to be LUV_4_BIEBER. *shudders* Remember me now? Still no? Okay..
ANYPENIS, I came back to this site a few nights पूर्व and went "Damn I miss this place!" Of course probably NONE if the people I knew are still here, but who cares- I can make new friends!
(that was a completely failed attempt at being sociable)
So I was looking back at my old account and holy fucking dickface I was the biggest idiot ever. Just- wow. Firer me apologizes for past me's illiterate लेखन skills, mary-sueishess, and generally being an annoying twat >.<
I guess this is a welcome back post? और like a "please dear god take me back" post :p
BUT HAY.
Flippy
10. Tell a बिना सोचे समझे person आप प्यार them
9. go up to a worker and ask them बिना सोचे समझे questoins about them (name age Zodiac sign)
8.Try on a bra thats way to big या for guys just a बिना सोचे समझे bra and ask a worker how आप look
7.sit in the middle of a isle
6.clog the toilet
5.go up to a बिना सोचे समझे person and say gimme all your cash and nobody gets hurt
4.(for department stores) Jump on a display bed
4.(grocery stores) Eat खाना before buying it
3.Scream bloody murder
2.Go store streaking
and number 1 is
1.yell kick me out of this store at the चोटी, शीर्ष of your lungs
9. go up to a worker and ask them बिना सोचे समझे questoins about them (name age Zodiac sign)
8.Try on a bra thats way to big या for guys just a बिना सोचे समझे bra and ask a worker how आप look
7.sit in the middle of a isle
6.clog the toilet
5.go up to a बिना सोचे समझे person and say gimme all your cash and nobody gets hurt
4.(for department stores) Jump on a display bed
4.(grocery stores) Eat खाना before buying it
3.Scream bloody murder
2.Go store streaking
and number 1 is
1.yell kick me out of this store at the चोटी, शीर्ष of your lungs
PK:were am i
*turns on lights
darla dimple: ...
PK:WHO ARE U?
darla dimple:...
PK: ok blah blah YAA *THROWS चाकू AT DD
darla dimple: *teleports to PK*
PK: ಠ_ಠ
PK: *LOOKS behind*
pinkie pie: wut i tell u about goin in MAH SHED
pk: wait this is a shed ohh ok*turns all dark again
PK: not again *someone turns on light*
pk: WHY AM I STRAPED UP
pinkie pie: *starts up chainsaw*
pk: oh no O_e
pinkie pie: *cuts up my guts*
pk: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUU
al da sudden flippy breaks in 007 style
PK: YAY HI FLIPPY
flippy: let me help u pinkie pie...
PK; OH COME ON!!!
both: cuts hands
PK:FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
both: go's into private room
PK: hmm I HAVE DA POWER *breaks chains*
pk: wow it worked
pk: looks at private window
*both havenig sexytime
pk: walks away
pk: e_e *stabs myself*
woke up DA END NOW DIE
10: "Ooh, never felt like [i]that[i] before!"
9: "Keep it coming!"
8: "Oh, [i]that's[i] what it does!"
7: "I like that. I like that a lot."
6: *Grunt* *Scream* "YES! OH, YES!"
5: "Hey, that tickles!"
4: "It felt different when (insert old partner's name) did that."
3: "Huh. That's bigger than I remember. Oh well."
2: "Wait. Is that yours या mine?"
1: "Hey. That's weird. How do आप put that back?"
I had a lot of fun लेखन these, and the majority of them I made up as I went along.
Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala.
9: "Keep it coming!"
8: "Oh, [i]that's[i] what it does!"
7: "I like that. I like that a lot."
6: *Grunt* *Scream* "YES! OH, YES!"
5: "Hey, that tickles!"
4: "It felt different when (insert old partner's name) did that."
3: "Huh. That's bigger than I remember. Oh well."
2: "Wait. Is that yours या mine?"
1: "Hey. That's weird. How do आप put that back?"
I had a lot of fun लेखन these, and the majority of them I made up as I went along.
Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala.
