Credit: mugglenet.com
I didn't write this, I just thought it was really funny.


1. "What did I ever do to y..oh, nevermind."

2. "Oh, ha ha, आप got me!! Am I on Punk'd? Where's the camera guy, huh? Where!?"

3. "Wow, you're even dumber than आप look, and that's saying something. What kind of idiot tells their victim what they're about to do?! I'm ready for आप now!!" *Prepare yourself द्वारा getting into various Matrix positions, beckon him with one finger*

4. "And she's all 'F.Y.I., he's so into me and not you.' and I'm all 'Yeah, right, whatever.' Oh, I'm sorry! Did आप say something?"

5. "Why do you...

हे people :) This is just a little song based fanfic that I wrote when I was bored and listening to the "Wicked" soundtrack. Hope आप enjoy!


“TOM!!!!” Young Bellatrix Black screams, her eyes wide with tears welding up inside them. She does the first thing she thinks of, she runs to her mother’s spell book. Her प्यार is in grave danger and she had to save him. She flips through the pages vigorously until she comes to a page that she hoped would help. Whipping out her wand from her pocket she began to sing the spell on the worn pages below her view.
    “Eleka nahmen...

The story of one of the Inferi that guarded Voldemort's locket horcrux in the cave. Yes, I took a few creative liberties, but I hope आप guys like it. It's kind of long, but please tell me what आप think. It's darker and और serious than most of the things I've written so far.


The last thing I remember from my पूर्व life is Lord Voldemort, the words “Avada Kedavra”, and then a flash of green light. Then blackness.

Everything was black, there was nothing, I was just sinking in darkness, I don’t know how long, until suddenly, I was back, and Lord Voldemort was still there, pointing a...

When that business was finished her wrist was throbbing from her flesh as terrible pain shot up her left arm. She went back downstairs to see Severus pacing alone in the gathering room. He looked to see Lenzetta and slightly smiled.
    “Hurts like hell don’t it? The mark I mean,” he कहा as she entered.
    “Yes…it burns actually…is that normal?” Lenzetta questioned. Snape nodded his head in reply to her question.
    “You’ll find Bellatrix down the hall, first door on your right,” he कहा as he pointed down a corridor....

The last week या so I have spent at a *shudder* MUGGLE ski resort. I was accompanied द्वारा several accomplices who shall remain nameless, just in case this रिपोर्ट falls into the wrong hands. (Such as the foolish ministry’s). Upon arriving at the ski resort, the stupid muggle behind the डेस्क was no match for our evilness. One Imperio and he upgraded our rooms to suites and handed us the contents of the cash register, which adds an impressive amount to our funds, द्वारा the way, Master. (That, AND robbing the gift shop! *See later paragraphs*)

The अगला morning, we were ready for the fun to begin. Not...

Hullo, my name's Alexia Lyneth. Call me whatever nickname आप wish, I don't mind much. Now, this interview is mandatory, oui? *Rolls eyes* Fine, let's just get this over with. The less time we spend on this, the और time we can spend fighting for the Dark Lord.
As I कहा up top, my name's Alexia. My mother named me that, named after some important person in the ministry, I think? I don't remember, nor do I care.
Anyway, I'm 18, and just ran away from Hogwarts to शामिल होइए the death eaters. But that doesn't matter, it's not like I'm not officially an adult या anything...
Why did I join? Simple, my...

The walls are illuminated द्वारा one small candle. Xander lies on his back staring at the ceiling above him. The shadows of both him and his novel crazed companion Josh dance upon the walls. The room is silent for a moment until Xander sighs heavily and turns to his side.

    “What’s wrong, Xan?” Josh questions, only glancing away from his book for a विभाजित करें, विभक्त करें moment.

    “She knows, Josh,” Xander replied pointedly.

Josh groaned in annoyance and practically threw his book aside.

    “Look, आप really need to elaborate on what you...

    The sun bleeds across the horizon. He strokes her back gently as the first glimpse of light becomes present in the sky. When the sun shows its full bloom, she turns to him. Her deep eyes gazing into his own, a smile etched on her face.

Listen to the wind blow
Watch the sun rise…
    
“I प्यार you, Roddy.”

    He knows it isn’t true, but Bellatrix black was a fantastic actress. Yes, Rodolphus knows it’s not true, the प्यार is fake. It’s only a lust for power. But does he protest? No. He accepts it. He feels that he must find...

“What’s the matter Potter? Afraid to fight me? आप shouldn’t be since आप do every damn दिन we see each other!” Snape yelled angrily at his enemy.
    “Oh that’s it Sev!” And with that, James lunged at Snape, tackling him to the floor. Hitting and punching went on for about seven मिनटों before a spell was shot at Jame’s back, disabling his mobility. Snape stared up at James in shock and finally pushed the फ्रोज़न teenager off of him. He looked to the direction in which the spell came, stunned to see Bellatrix Black’s wand smoking at it’s tip.
    “Why...

The Black Lake holds a misty fog as young Severus Snape stands at the edge of the murky water. Twenty मिनटों he had been standing there. Twenty मिनटों he had been waiting. It had been too long and the night brought a freezing air. Why had he even expected her to come? It was stupid, she wouldn’t come to accept his apology…Not after how badly he had spoken about her blood. She was probably curled up द्वारा the आग in the Gryffindore common room with her new love.
    “Damn it, James,” Snape muttered aloud to himself.
    Snape hated James Potter with...

Lenzetta’s POV

    “No!” the child screamed as he backed against the wall, holding a चाकू with a shaky hand. I laughed at him as tears trickled down his cheeks and dropped to the floor. “Please, I won’t mention आप were here-”
    “Liar,” I कहा in a low tone as I advanced towards the small boy. I could here his mother sobbing from the other room and his father screaming cuss words at the चोटी, शीर्ष of his lungs. I had to tie them to a chair if my one man raid were able to work. I looked at the boy closely. Tears poured from his eyes, his nose...

My name is Alexander Kriechen, but आप may call me Xander. I grew up in the city of Aachen Germany with my mother, father, and two brothers Gregory and Jeremiah. I will admit, I’m a half-blood for my mother is a witch and my father a muggle. I guess आप can say it took me a while to notice, but when I was about 4 ears old I began to notice my mother’s “powers” as I used to call them. My father was never fond of her being a witch, he didn’t find it at all normal and hoped and prayed that I would not possess the same qualities. My brothers didn’t turn out to be magic so when my “powers”...

"Mother! Let's go! We need to go to Diagon Ally!", Draco rushed his mom. "Alright! Alright! Don't rush! There will be plenty of things left to buy", Narcissa snapped at her son. They soon headed off for Diagon Ally. Draco read the letter.

Dear My.Malfoy
We are pleased to inform आप that आप have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and
Wizardry. Please find enclosed a सूची of all
necessary पुस्तकें and equipment. Term begins on September 1. We await your owl द्वारा no later than July 31.
Yours Sincerely,
Minerva McMGonagall
Deputy Headmistress
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft And Wizardry
_____________________________________________...

Credit: mugglenet.com

Greetings, new follower:

If आप are पढ़ना this letter then आप have doubtless been accepted into the select band of professional wizards known as the Death Eaters. If द्वारा some unprecedented chance आप are पढ़ना this and आप have not been accepted into the Death Eaters then I suggest आप put down this letter and leave now, या the consequences for आप will be as terrible as my lifelong study into the Dark Arts can make them.

Please find enclosed a short introductory guide to Death Eating, which आप must memorize and then eat, to prevent security leaks. (Due to an unfortunate...

Hey, so this story is basically Kate visiting Bellatrix in Azkaban after the Longbottom torture. Can आप please tell me what आप think so I can see if I should even bother लेखन more? Be HONEST! Thanks!

The नाव raced आगे in the open sea. The salty spray relentlessly pounded on her face. It was so bad she’d दिया up on trying to avoid it. The दिन was gloomy and gray, suiting her general mood perfectly. Kate sighed and sat back, staring out to sea. The only things visible in any direction were the choppy gray ocean waves. She knew it was madness to even be attempting what she was planning,...