"I still remember the world from the eyes of a child. Slowly those feelings were clouded द्वारा what I know now..."



I sat there in the police department, swinging my legs back and forth high above the floor. I was wearing my प्रिय purple dress and my तितली sandals. My dark brown hair was in a high ponytail and it bounced as I looked both sides. Where was Mommy? Carmine and Reed sat अगला to me there, and they were not happy. Carmine, twelve at the time, had tears coming from his eyes. Reed, fourteen, had his face in his hands, so I couldn't see what he looked like. Soon I got sick of waiting and tapped Reed on the shoulder. He growled at me.

"Reed? When is Mommy coming back?" I asked. Reed didn't answer me right away. He rubbed the side of his head in circles like Mommy does when she's annoyed with me.

"She's not coming back, Harley," he told me finally. i pouted.

"Don't be a liar, that's not nice," I warned him.

"I'm serious, Harley!" He looked at me with red, teary eyes. "She's not coming back!" I stood there, taking in his words.

"Why not?! Mommy has to come back! She has to!" I cried. A police man came over and bent down अगला to me. He asked me what was wrong. "Where's Mommy! I want my Mommy!"

"You need to wait here for your older brother, Sweetie," he told me. I shook my head back and forth.

"No! I want Mommy!" I screamed. Reed begged me to be quiet, but I couldn't. I didn't want to stop until Mommy came, to hold me and tell me she was here and she wasn't going anywhere. Carmine cried more, which didn't make me feel better. Carmine was supposed to be a big kid. And it's hard for big kids to cry.

Soon, my oldest brother, Nikolai, who was eighteen and lived out of the house, showed up to the police station. I ran into his arms, crying and telling him how no one would tell me where Mommy was.

"I know. आप guys are going to come घर with me, ok?" I sniffed and nodded. Maybe Mommy was at Nikolai's house. Reed and Carmine followed Nikolai out to his car, while he held me. I wiped my tears on his shirt.

When we got to Nikolai's house, they called it apart-man's, all my stuff was there. Carmine's and Reed's was too. Why'd he bring all my clothes, toys, blanket, and तकिया here? I sniffed and wiped my nose on my sleeve.

"Reed, Carmine, आप guys decide who's sleeping on the floor and who's sleeping on the couch. Harley, there's a small futon, फ़ुटन in the guest room, ok? You'll sleep there." I nodded and dragged my 'My Little Pony' blanket and तकिया to the room Nikolai was talking about. All that was in there was a tiny little couch. Nothing else. The room was starch white, with absolutely nothing else in it. It was so boring! I laid my blanket and तकिया on the couch, setting it up like my बिस्तर back home. I didn't know where my pj's were, but I was so tired I didn't think I was awake enough to change into them. I yawned and laid down to sleep.

I woke up in the middle of the night, and cried. I had a terrible nightmare! As I was crying, I grabbed my stuffed horsie and ran into Nikolai's room.

"Nikolai?"

Hmm..." he yawned.

"Can I sleep with you? I had a nightmare..." I said, wiping my eyes. He let out a long breath, and then scooted over.

"Fine," he कहा in an angry voice. I climbed in अगला to him. I still didn't feel better, so I cuddled up अगला to him like I did with Mommy when I was scared.

"Nikolai?"

"Hm."

"Do आप ever have nightmares?" I wondered.

"Sometimes," he answered in a sleepy voice.

"Oh... Nikolai?"

"What."

"What are they about?"

"Go to sleep, Harley."

"Ok..... Nikolai?"

"What," he said, almost shouting. But he had to be quiet so he wouldn't wake up Carmine या Reed.

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Harley."

**Nine years later....**

I trudged through the freezing rain, my maroon hoodie doing a not-so-good job of shielding me from it. I kept one hand in my pocket, on the plastic bag of weed that a guy had just sold me for, cheap. He was obviously not bright; I'd be able to sell this stuff for nearly twice as much as he sold it for.

I turned down the alley, a shortcut to the apartment. I heard footsteps behind me, but I didn't dare look behind me. I kept my head down, and continued walking, a little faster now. I listened to behind me; it sounded like at least two people. Probably guys. I heard them chuckle. Yep; two men.

"Hey!" one of them called. I ignored him and continued walking. They laughed again. I cursed under my breath when I came to the end of the alley. Today, of all days, they decided to lock the gate. I wouldn't be able to climb over it in time before the men were in reach of me.

"Hey wait!" the other called. I turned to face them. They were less scary than I imagined; instead of big and muscular, they were average sized and barely had anything muscle on them. But still, if they were pursuing me, they probably had something up their sleeve that would be able to take me down. They came closer, evil grins on their face.

"Hi," the first man called. "What's your name?" he asked, the smile growing bigger across his face.

"Get lost," I said, backing up closer to the chain-link fence. The men snickered.

"Aw, don't be like that. C'mon. Why don't आप hang out with us for a while?" Quickly, I reached into my pants pocket and pulled out my hand gun. I aimed at them. Their faces were absolutely priceless. I wish I could get it on camera. They put their hands up, as if I were a cop of something.

"Don't fuck with me," I said. I put my finger on the trigger. "Now, get lost!" I कहा again. They nodded real quick and ran back down the alley, their hands behind their heads and ducking and dodging like scared animals. I laughed to myself and put the gun back in my pocket. I climbed over the fence, it rattled underneath me, and made my way back to the apartment in the pouring rain.