1. If आप face in a certain direction so that there are a lot of people, objects, shiny surfaces, and/or आप can see really far, time may slow down and your vision will become choppy.
2. Sometimes if आप go somewhere you’re “not supposed to be” आप may fall through the ground and find yourself falling through a void, with the world as आप know it rapidly disappearing into the distance above.
3. Turtles and mushrooms can kill आप just द्वारा touching आप anywhere other than the bottom of your feet.
4. While on a तारीख, दिनांक with a girl, just barely brushing a pedestrian with your car accidentally will ruin your तारीख, दिनांक fast. However, the same girl will have no problem with helping आप intentionally steal as many cars as आप want.
5. आप can only have unclothed sex after applying a patch.
6. No matter how heinous a crime आप pull, even directly in front of cops, they will forget what आप look like and what car आप sped off in if आप stay out of their sight for 20 seconds.
7. Regardless of shoe type, the soles are always so slippery that standing on any slope greater than 45 degrees will cause आप to slide like an ice skater downhill.
8. Some types of molten lava will not kill you, even if आप fall completely in, as long as आप jump out quickly.
9. Whenever आप find a valuable item lying around in a dark corner, a short musical flourish will come from nowhere. Warning: आप will become addicted to that sound.
10. If you’re ever in a shootout and firing near cover, आप may find that even though आप have clear line-of-sight to your opponent’s head, your bullets are bouncing off some invisible force near the cover आप are hiding behind. Moving sideways a few inches will alleviate the problem.
11. Reloading a gun when only one bullet has been expended won't waste the other bullets left in the clip that आप have just tossed on the ground. Also, the clip casing itself will disappear the moment it leaves your hand, resulting in no messy cleanup.
12. At some unknown point in history a brilliant scientist invented indestructible glass. Not just bulletproof, but even point-blank rocket launcher proof. Also, this glass managed to replace a large portion of the world’s windows without anybody noticing या having to pay a fee for the installation.
13. Whoever came up with the Periodic तालिका, टेबल is an idiot and a fraud. There are obviously only 4 elements.
14. It’s possible to be in full daylight outdoors without the Sun visible anywhere in the sky.
15. Even if आप are an obviously experienced warrior, you’ll need someone to teach आप how to jump in the air while pointing your sword downward, and another person to teach आप about pointing your sword upward.
16. Every woman in the world who isn’t a one-woman super assassin army needs to be rescued.
17. Typewriters are actually temporal devices that आप can return to after dying या making a mistake, as long as आप type the तारीख, दिनांक and time into them.
18. Shotguns will still be in common use even thousands of years into the future, despite advances in energy-weapon technology and armor plating. The reason, of course, is that shotguns are awesome.
19. If you’re a soldier in a war and आप use every tactic and weapon आप can to stay alive and kill the enemy, some of the people आप killed will call आप “cheap” from beyond the grave, possibly even haunting आप with accusations of how “skill-less” आप are.
20. If you’re in a martial arts tournament and are about to lose, आप can quit at the last सेकंड and your opponent will be दिया the loss on his record. Whether your dignity remains untarnished is another matter.
21. Telekinetic aliens have a really, really hard time getting out of holes in the ground.
22. In medieval times, the only thing knights wore under their armor was polka-dot बॉक्सर shorts.
23. सुपरमैन is actually vulnerable to a whole lot और than kryptonite. He also can’t fly wherever he wants, and instead must fly through giant floating rings. Overall, being सुपरमैन sucks.
24. If आप uppercut someone hard enough, huge globs of coagulated blood will fly out of nowhere in particular on their body, leaving no noticeable wound.
25. If आप uppercut someone just a bit harder, their head may fly off, या their entire body may fly straight through the ceiling. If they aren’t dead yet, you’ll have to leap up through the ceiling to finish the fight.
26. In the future, the most skilled soldiers will enter battle heavily armored, but not wear helmets.
27. Most people can survive indefinitely without eating, while others will die in a few मिनटों without food.
28. आप can sleep at any time of the दिन regardless of how recently आप last slept. However, आप can only sleep in certain designated beds.
29. Storekeepers don’t care if आप go behind the counter and rummage around in everything, as long as आप don’t actually take anything. Some will even let आप take things without paying, as long as कहा things are in shiny chests या pots located somewhere in front of the counter.
30. If आप torture a chicken long enough, his posse will come for revenge.
31. Every time आप enter your house, you’ll have to wait a while before आप can see the inside.
32. आप can grab and easily shake a full-grown पेड़ with a सूँ ढ, ट्रंक that is two feet thick, and delicious फल will come raining down.
33. If आप crouch in a slightly shadowy area, people facing आप from two feet away cannot see you.
34. Most trained guards cannot see और than 50 feet in front of them, cannot hear a massive gunfight happening a few rooms away, and will often stop in the middle of a patrol to stare at a blank दीवार with their back facing a long hallway.
35. Personality means never saying a word.
36. Wardrobe malfunctions never happen during strenuous activity because all women glue their clothes on.
37. Everything you’ve used can be sold back for exactly half price, regardless of the item’s condition.
38. Walking takes too long; jogging is the preferred method of transport, even when moving only a few feet.
39. आप can only sprint for about five seconds, after which you’ll be so winded you’ll be panting like a dog. However, in another five seconds, आप can sprint at full speed again.
40. Stairs only look like right-angled ascending platforms. In reality, they are just a smooth slope upon which आप can plant your feet anywhere.
41. If आप come to a huge pile of कचरा, जंक, रद्दी blocking an alley, even though it looks easily climbable, don’t even bother. Obviously, this is the end of the universe.
42. Even though zombies are created द्वारा a virus, being bitten द्वारा one will never infect you. आप may need to eat some commonly potted herbs to take care of the wound, though.
43. Wild जानवर are all extremely aggressive. When going into uncivilized areas, carry a gun and shoot everything that moves before it can attack you.
44. It’s pretty easy to kill twenty terrorists with your bare hands…
45. ...but forget about jumping over a two-foot sandbag.
46. Cops don’t care how many cars आप smash into right in front of them, as long as it’s not theirs.
47. Cops don’t understand the concept of license plates. A fresh paint job will fool them every time.
48. Combined arms in war is not always the most effective strategy. Often massing a single type of unit is better.
49. An entire fortified outpost can be constructed in a matter of minutes, even directly in front of an enemy base and while under attack.
50. When establishing colonies in new lands, often the best approach is to train a few crack troops while scouting for potential threats, and then sending a small force to attack the closest town as quickly as possible. Be sure to order your troops to kill anyone carrying या building anything first.
51. A wooden stake is not, in fact, the weapon of choice when going up against vampires. A whip is.
52. If a person offers to pay आप to go out and collect 20 widgets and then bring them back to him, it’s not a job, it’s entertainment.
53. Being a rock तारा, स्टार doesn’t require creativity या talent, just dexterity and timing.
54. The spikier your hair, the और power आप have.
55. Choosing one emotion and channeling it 24/7 counts as personality.
56. If your pseudo-philosophical babbling doesn’t appear effective in impressing someone, just pile on और jargon and bigger words. No one will notice.
57. Pausing for a long time between sentences isn’t awkward at all, and sounds totally natural, since everyone else does it.
58. Never trust the सलाह of someone helping आप out of some dire situation via an earpiece या speaker system.
59. Every military, police, या Special Forces squad has one member that is smarter, और skilled, and harder to kill than the others.
60. Going through life-threatening experiences doesn’t just make आप wiser, it also makes आप stronger, faster, and increasingly impervious to harm.
61. Most clothing never needs to be washed, cannot be damaged in any way, and won’t create awkward stares if आप wear the same outfit every day.
62. Hypothermia is a medical hoax. Go ahead and wear short-shorts in Antarctica.
63. It’s possible to climb a ladder without using your arms. This is especially useful if आप are carrying a huge gun.
64. Armies of every era have required their soldiers to be telepathic so they can respond to orders instantly and हटाइए in large groups with perfect simultaneous coordination.
65. Still, a single highly-trained telepathic soldier sometimes just cannot figure out how to get from point A to B, despite having a pretty damn clear path.
66. Nobody in the world actually mourns a loved one’s death for और than ten seconds.
67. Strangely, though, for some reason studies have shown revenge for a loved one’s death to be the number-one motivation for the epidemic of one-man killing sprees plaguing mankind.
68. Your arms will never get tired even if आप hold a Gatling gun perfectly straight out in front of आप for hours on end.
69. In the future, soldiers will be sent into combat situations without a way to clip a light onto their gun, helmet, या any other hands-free device. Also, duct tape will be eradicated from existence some time earlier.
70. Successfully catching a मछली doesn’t take NEARLY as long as everyone claims.
71. Most cars actually require no gas at all.
72. If आप are ever in a situation where आप have to help someone escape danger, take a deep breath and try to resist becoming angry at this person. A psychological phenomenon known as IDS, या “Idiocy in Danger Syndrome” reduces anyone to total incompetence in such a situation, no matter how intelligent they appear to be.
73. For reasons scientist have still failed to explain, it’s possible to jump off of pure air, but only once after initially jumping off the ground.
74. World War II was not won द्वारा numerous countries coordinating attacks across the globe, but rather द्वारा a single jack-hole with a gun. कहा jack-hole’s identity varies depending on the source.
75. Carrying around 200 lbs of weight will not hinder आप at all. However, carrying 201 lbs will prevent आप from moving an inch.
76. Sometimes the recently departed are prone to seizures if their bodies happen to be touching walls या other objects.
77. It’s possible that while looking at surfaces from certain angles, huge portions may suddenly stretch, flicker, या jiggle. STAY CALM. आप are not on drugs.
78. If you’re participating in an illegal सड़क, स्ट्रीट race and आप don’t do well, all of your opponents don’t mind racing again and again so that आप can eventually win.
79. If आप are a security guard and all of your fellow guards disappear, it is perfectly fine to खोजिए for an intruder for thirty seconds, then return to your normal खोजिए route, on your own, at midnight, while आप know a murderer is on the loose and has been sighted within 5 meters of आप in the last few minutes.
80. If you’re ever hard up for cash, just go cut down any tall घास आप see.
81. Boomerangs are in fact extremely useful tools and potentially deadly weapons, and not crappy toys that fall on the ground every time आप throw them.
82. Performing a stunt in the middle of a race is not a dangerous and risky display of poor sportsmanship, but in fact allows आप to go even faster.
83. Cars with official corporate logos on them are indestructible...
84. …generic rip-offs, however, will smash into a crumpled wad while hitting a tree.
85. If you’re in a life-threatening situation, try focusing really hard. आप may experience a slowing down of time, या possibly a nice glowing color indicating danger या safety.
86. Shooting someone in the chest at point-blank range with a semi-automatic राइफल may not kill them sometimes, but smacking them with the butt of the same राइफल will induce death every single time.
87. आप can walk down the सड़क, स्ट्रीट with a fully automatic weapon and not even get a सेकंड glance from the police.
88. All small electronics like radios, earpieces, and cell phones will work no matter how much water आप swim through. Also, all guns, medicinal herbs, alchemic powders, paper documents, and explosives are equally waterproof.
89. A night in jail is usually enough to have your trial ready the दिन after, and even the worst crimes generally result in a small fine.
90. Hacking into high-security areas does not require extensive training and expertise, but rather the ability to solve simple shape-sliding या color-matching puzzles.
91. If a mayor wants to demolish someone’s house to put a big statue of himself there instead, it's perfectly acceptable to do so. In fact, it will increase the mayor’s approval rating from the adjacent home-owners.
92. As long as a military general kills और of the enemy than his own troops, he is considered an unqualified success.
93. आप can behave like a psychotic a-hole one moment, and then lay on the syrupy प्यार the next, and no one will think you’re crazy, या even remember what आप कहा ten सेकंड्स ago.
94. It is a great idea to pick up बिना सोचे समझे syringes off of vending machines and inject yourself to find out what happens.
95. 95% of all doors in the world are locked या jammed shut and cannot be opened द्वारा any conventional means.
96. Every conspicuously tall building in the Middle East has a hay-cart sitting directly under it, so feel free to dive off of every one.
97. In modern warfare, the only way to win is द्वारा advancing, because the enemy will never run out of troops otherwise.
98. Have fantasies of being a police officer, रोगी वाहन, एम्बुलेंस driver, fireman, या cab driver? Just steal one of the appropriate vehicles. No one at dispatch will wonder why their usual driver’s voice suddenly changed.
99. If you’re ever stuck in a burning building, find something red to wear. Red clothing usually denotes some measure of heat protection.
100. Every product in the world is priced in whole dollars. Pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters do not exist.
101. Death is never permanent. Even if it were, आप could always just kill him.
2. Sometimes if आप go somewhere you’re “not supposed to be” आप may fall through the ground and find yourself falling through a void, with the world as आप know it rapidly disappearing into the distance above.
3. Turtles and mushrooms can kill आप just द्वारा touching आप anywhere other than the bottom of your feet.
4. While on a तारीख, दिनांक with a girl, just barely brushing a pedestrian with your car accidentally will ruin your तारीख, दिनांक fast. However, the same girl will have no problem with helping आप intentionally steal as many cars as आप want.
5. आप can only have unclothed sex after applying a patch.
6. No matter how heinous a crime आप pull, even directly in front of cops, they will forget what आप look like and what car आप sped off in if आप stay out of their sight for 20 seconds.
7. Regardless of shoe type, the soles are always so slippery that standing on any slope greater than 45 degrees will cause आप to slide like an ice skater downhill.
8. Some types of molten lava will not kill you, even if आप fall completely in, as long as आप jump out quickly.
9. Whenever आप find a valuable item lying around in a dark corner, a short musical flourish will come from nowhere. Warning: आप will become addicted to that sound.
10. If you’re ever in a shootout and firing near cover, आप may find that even though आप have clear line-of-sight to your opponent’s head, your bullets are bouncing off some invisible force near the cover आप are hiding behind. Moving sideways a few inches will alleviate the problem.
11. Reloading a gun when only one bullet has been expended won't waste the other bullets left in the clip that आप have just tossed on the ground. Also, the clip casing itself will disappear the moment it leaves your hand, resulting in no messy cleanup.
12. At some unknown point in history a brilliant scientist invented indestructible glass. Not just bulletproof, but even point-blank rocket launcher proof. Also, this glass managed to replace a large portion of the world’s windows without anybody noticing या having to pay a fee for the installation.
13. Whoever came up with the Periodic तालिका, टेबल is an idiot and a fraud. There are obviously only 4 elements.
14. It’s possible to be in full daylight outdoors without the Sun visible anywhere in the sky.
15. Even if आप are an obviously experienced warrior, you’ll need someone to teach आप how to jump in the air while pointing your sword downward, and another person to teach आप about pointing your sword upward.
16. Every woman in the world who isn’t a one-woman super assassin army needs to be rescued.
17. Typewriters are actually temporal devices that आप can return to after dying या making a mistake, as long as आप type the तारीख, दिनांक and time into them.
18. Shotguns will still be in common use even thousands of years into the future, despite advances in energy-weapon technology and armor plating. The reason, of course, is that shotguns are awesome.
19. If you’re a soldier in a war and आप use every tactic and weapon आप can to stay alive and kill the enemy, some of the people आप killed will call आप “cheap” from beyond the grave, possibly even haunting आप with accusations of how “skill-less” आप are.
20. If you’re in a martial arts tournament and are about to lose, आप can quit at the last सेकंड and your opponent will be दिया the loss on his record. Whether your dignity remains untarnished is another matter.
21. Telekinetic aliens have a really, really hard time getting out of holes in the ground.
22. In medieval times, the only thing knights wore under their armor was polka-dot बॉक्सर shorts.
23. सुपरमैन is actually vulnerable to a whole lot और than kryptonite. He also can’t fly wherever he wants, and instead must fly through giant floating rings. Overall, being सुपरमैन sucks.
24. If आप uppercut someone hard enough, huge globs of coagulated blood will fly out of nowhere in particular on their body, leaving no noticeable wound.
25. If आप uppercut someone just a bit harder, their head may fly off, या their entire body may fly straight through the ceiling. If they aren’t dead yet, you’ll have to leap up through the ceiling to finish the fight.
26. In the future, the most skilled soldiers will enter battle heavily armored, but not wear helmets.
27. Most people can survive indefinitely without eating, while others will die in a few मिनटों without food.
28. आप can sleep at any time of the दिन regardless of how recently आप last slept. However, आप can only sleep in certain designated beds.
29. Storekeepers don’t care if आप go behind the counter and rummage around in everything, as long as आप don’t actually take anything. Some will even let आप take things without paying, as long as कहा things are in shiny chests या pots located somewhere in front of the counter.
30. If आप torture a chicken long enough, his posse will come for revenge.
31. Every time आप enter your house, you’ll have to wait a while before आप can see the inside.
32. आप can grab and easily shake a full-grown पेड़ with a सूँ ढ, ट्रंक that is two feet thick, and delicious फल will come raining down.
33. If आप crouch in a slightly shadowy area, people facing आप from two feet away cannot see you.
34. Most trained guards cannot see और than 50 feet in front of them, cannot hear a massive gunfight happening a few rooms away, and will often stop in the middle of a patrol to stare at a blank दीवार with their back facing a long hallway.
35. Personality means never saying a word.
36. Wardrobe malfunctions never happen during strenuous activity because all women glue their clothes on.
37. Everything you’ve used can be sold back for exactly half price, regardless of the item’s condition.
38. Walking takes too long; jogging is the preferred method of transport, even when moving only a few feet.
39. आप can only sprint for about five seconds, after which you’ll be so winded you’ll be panting like a dog. However, in another five seconds, आप can sprint at full speed again.
40. Stairs only look like right-angled ascending platforms. In reality, they are just a smooth slope upon which आप can plant your feet anywhere.
41. If आप come to a huge pile of कचरा, जंक, रद्दी blocking an alley, even though it looks easily climbable, don’t even bother. Obviously, this is the end of the universe.
42. Even though zombies are created द्वारा a virus, being bitten द्वारा one will never infect you. आप may need to eat some commonly potted herbs to take care of the wound, though.
43. Wild जानवर are all extremely aggressive. When going into uncivilized areas, carry a gun and shoot everything that moves before it can attack you.
44. It’s pretty easy to kill twenty terrorists with your bare hands…
45. ...but forget about jumping over a two-foot sandbag.
46. Cops don’t care how many cars आप smash into right in front of them, as long as it’s not theirs.
47. Cops don’t understand the concept of license plates. A fresh paint job will fool them every time.
48. Combined arms in war is not always the most effective strategy. Often massing a single type of unit is better.
49. An entire fortified outpost can be constructed in a matter of minutes, even directly in front of an enemy base and while under attack.
50. When establishing colonies in new lands, often the best approach is to train a few crack troops while scouting for potential threats, and then sending a small force to attack the closest town as quickly as possible. Be sure to order your troops to kill anyone carrying या building anything first.
51. A wooden stake is not, in fact, the weapon of choice when going up against vampires. A whip is.
52. If a person offers to pay आप to go out and collect 20 widgets and then bring them back to him, it’s not a job, it’s entertainment.
53. Being a rock तारा, स्टार doesn’t require creativity या talent, just dexterity and timing.
54. The spikier your hair, the और power आप have.
55. Choosing one emotion and channeling it 24/7 counts as personality.
56. If your pseudo-philosophical babbling doesn’t appear effective in impressing someone, just pile on और jargon and bigger words. No one will notice.
57. Pausing for a long time between sentences isn’t awkward at all, and sounds totally natural, since everyone else does it.
58. Never trust the सलाह of someone helping आप out of some dire situation via an earpiece या speaker system.
59. Every military, police, या Special Forces squad has one member that is smarter, और skilled, and harder to kill than the others.
60. Going through life-threatening experiences doesn’t just make आप wiser, it also makes आप stronger, faster, and increasingly impervious to harm.
61. Most clothing never needs to be washed, cannot be damaged in any way, and won’t create awkward stares if आप wear the same outfit every day.
62. Hypothermia is a medical hoax. Go ahead and wear short-shorts in Antarctica.
63. It’s possible to climb a ladder without using your arms. This is especially useful if आप are carrying a huge gun.
64. Armies of every era have required their soldiers to be telepathic so they can respond to orders instantly and हटाइए in large groups with perfect simultaneous coordination.
65. Still, a single highly-trained telepathic soldier sometimes just cannot figure out how to get from point A to B, despite having a pretty damn clear path.
66. Nobody in the world actually mourns a loved one’s death for और than ten seconds.
67. Strangely, though, for some reason studies have shown revenge for a loved one’s death to be the number-one motivation for the epidemic of one-man killing sprees plaguing mankind.
68. Your arms will never get tired even if आप hold a Gatling gun perfectly straight out in front of आप for hours on end.
69. In the future, soldiers will be sent into combat situations without a way to clip a light onto their gun, helmet, या any other hands-free device. Also, duct tape will be eradicated from existence some time earlier.
70. Successfully catching a मछली doesn’t take NEARLY as long as everyone claims.
71. Most cars actually require no gas at all.
72. If आप are ever in a situation where आप have to help someone escape danger, take a deep breath and try to resist becoming angry at this person. A psychological phenomenon known as IDS, या “Idiocy in Danger Syndrome” reduces anyone to total incompetence in such a situation, no matter how intelligent they appear to be.
73. For reasons scientist have still failed to explain, it’s possible to jump off of pure air, but only once after initially jumping off the ground.
74. World War II was not won द्वारा numerous countries coordinating attacks across the globe, but rather द्वारा a single jack-hole with a gun. कहा jack-hole’s identity varies depending on the source.
75. Carrying around 200 lbs of weight will not hinder आप at all. However, carrying 201 lbs will prevent आप from moving an inch.
76. Sometimes the recently departed are prone to seizures if their bodies happen to be touching walls या other objects.
77. It’s possible that while looking at surfaces from certain angles, huge portions may suddenly stretch, flicker, या jiggle. STAY CALM. आप are not on drugs.
78. If you’re participating in an illegal सड़क, स्ट्रीट race and आप don’t do well, all of your opponents don’t mind racing again and again so that आप can eventually win.
79. If आप are a security guard and all of your fellow guards disappear, it is perfectly fine to खोजिए for an intruder for thirty seconds, then return to your normal खोजिए route, on your own, at midnight, while आप know a murderer is on the loose and has been sighted within 5 meters of आप in the last few minutes.
80. If you’re ever hard up for cash, just go cut down any tall घास आप see.
81. Boomerangs are in fact extremely useful tools and potentially deadly weapons, and not crappy toys that fall on the ground every time आप throw them.
82. Performing a stunt in the middle of a race is not a dangerous and risky display of poor sportsmanship, but in fact allows आप to go even faster.
83. Cars with official corporate logos on them are indestructible...
84. …generic rip-offs, however, will smash into a crumpled wad while hitting a tree.
85. If you’re in a life-threatening situation, try focusing really hard. आप may experience a slowing down of time, या possibly a nice glowing color indicating danger या safety.
86. Shooting someone in the chest at point-blank range with a semi-automatic राइफल may not kill them sometimes, but smacking them with the butt of the same राइफल will induce death every single time.
87. आप can walk down the सड़क, स्ट्रीट with a fully automatic weapon and not even get a सेकंड glance from the police.
88. All small electronics like radios, earpieces, and cell phones will work no matter how much water आप swim through. Also, all guns, medicinal herbs, alchemic powders, paper documents, and explosives are equally waterproof.
89. A night in jail is usually enough to have your trial ready the दिन after, and even the worst crimes generally result in a small fine.
90. Hacking into high-security areas does not require extensive training and expertise, but rather the ability to solve simple shape-sliding या color-matching puzzles.
91. If a mayor wants to demolish someone’s house to put a big statue of himself there instead, it's perfectly acceptable to do so. In fact, it will increase the mayor’s approval rating from the adjacent home-owners.
92. As long as a military general kills और of the enemy than his own troops, he is considered an unqualified success.
93. आप can behave like a psychotic a-hole one moment, and then lay on the syrupy प्यार the next, and no one will think you’re crazy, या even remember what आप कहा ten सेकंड्स ago.
94. It is a great idea to pick up बिना सोचे समझे syringes off of vending machines and inject yourself to find out what happens.
95. 95% of all doors in the world are locked या jammed shut and cannot be opened द्वारा any conventional means.
96. Every conspicuously tall building in the Middle East has a hay-cart sitting directly under it, so feel free to dive off of every one.
97. In modern warfare, the only way to win is द्वारा advancing, because the enemy will never run out of troops otherwise.
98. Have fantasies of being a police officer, रोगी वाहन, एम्बुलेंस driver, fireman, या cab driver? Just steal one of the appropriate vehicles. No one at dispatch will wonder why their usual driver’s voice suddenly changed.
99. If you’re ever stuck in a burning building, find something red to wear. Red clothing usually denotes some measure of heat protection.
100. Every product in the world is priced in whole dollars. Pennies, nickels, dimes and quarters do not exist.
101. Death is never permanent. Even if it were, आप could always just kill him.
What remains of couch-multiplayer:
