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posted by TwilytCraze247
chapter one. unlawful death

It had been a warm दिन for Rochester. But not warm enough for the sun to come out. I was in a happy and in an up right mood, but why wouldn’t I be, it was a couple days from marrying my fiancé Royce, he came from a wealthy, and respectable family my father had chosen for me. It was only right Royce and I was betrothed together. It was all about how the public viewed the family, I was told that from my mother at a very young age, I was also told that I would make the family very pleased when I was older as I would be the most beautiful girl in all of the world and I deserved to be around people who treated me like a queen. I never really believed my mother when she कहा that, I always thought that she had to say that because she was my mother, and I could never be और beautiful than her, she had a flawless skin that always seemed to bring a slight glow to her face when ever she smiled, even in the darkest and stormiest times, her eyes were a bright blue, brighter than the skies deepest blue but never darker that the oceans seas –I was always slightly jealous that I didn’t have her eyes, god has giving me the same dark purple eyes as my father, my eyes always reminded me of violets but they never sparkled quite the same as my mothers did when she was truly happy- I was दिया the same beautiful golden locks that sat perfectly no matter which hair style आप wore it in as my mothers, but she was also blessed with a beauty spot just off to the left of her chin right below the end of her mouth, this completed her दिल shaped face and was the reason why I would never be as beautiful as my mother. She was the perfect wife and mother who stood right द्वारा my father’s side even if she didn’t agree with the situation. Late one night I was hiding in my mother closet with my face covered in her make up, and wearing her प्रिय pearl हार my parents never saw me as my father barged into the room throwing my mother to floor beating her, once he was done he stormed out the room and my mother fled to the bathroom, I made my escape positive that the अगला दिन me and my mother would be leaving without my father, but instead she got up as nothing had happened the night before and stood द्वारा my fathers side again as he accepted a promotion from the bank where he worked, I realized than that she would never leave him because she thought it’s not what आप think about yourself, it’s how the public sees you, and that’s how life is, but I didn’t have the same देखा गया as my mother and would never be taken advantage of like that and still stand द्वारा there side. When I was only 8 years old I figured out my mother was right, I was the most beautiful girl in the world, well I must have been the attention I got from the males proved it, they always wonted to do things for me, give me thing, I never had to lift a figure I was treated as a queen. Just like my mother कहा I deserved to be treated. That was when I started paying attention to my looks, making sure I always had the nicest clothes, the best hair, and the whitest teeth, smelled well. Looking the best out of all my peers. My parents were pleased द्वारा the way guys looked at me and were every pleased द्वारा how many parents wished for there son to be worthy enough in my fathers eyes to marry me. But my father had one guy in mind. Royce King the second. Royce didn’t have a problem with accepting the idea that we would be married, he had always had a keen eye for me and when the word got out that my father approved of him for me गुलाब started turning up on my door steep with प्यार litters and poems. It was only right Royce and I was betrothed together, we would make the perfect couple from the “publics’” eye. And my mother was certain he would make me feel like a queen, and never treat me the way my father treated her. And for that I would accept his hand in marriage. We only had dated for a less than two months before he had asked for my hand in marriage, we had spent the past 5 months together, attending parties and other social events he was a gentleman and I could see my self falling in प्यार with him to an extent but I don’t think I could ever truly प्यार him like how my good friend Vera loved her husband. I had just finished visiting them and I was walking down the सड़क, स्ट्रीट to my fathers house, it wasn’t to dark out, the sky was a turning a dark blue and the सड़क, स्ट्रीट light hadn’t turned on yet so I didn’t bother calling my father to escort me घर I decided to enjoy the rest of the warm evening and walk the short distance. While I was walking I couldn’t stop thinking of how different my relationship with Royce was compared to Vera’s relationship was with her husband. Sure Royce sent me गुलाब and violets after he had noticed what I had always thought, that my eye’s reminded me of them. And the way he treated and respected me I was positive that he would never hit me. But I could never get over the fact that Royce had never kissed me in public, when he had kissed me it never felt like he was doing it to declare to anyone that we were together या that he wonted to किस me but और like he only kissed me because I wonted him to. Thinking like that only made me feel depressed, like that he didn’t even think of me like that, and we would never have the kind of relationship I thought we would, the kind of relationship I wonted. I wonted to have kids that were all beautiful and would have my good look, I wonted to teach my daughter all about make up and play dress up with her I wonted a son that would follow in Royce’s foot steps in society that was sporty, smart, hansom, and all the girls would fall in प्यार with like the guys fell in प्यार with me, I wonted to have family picnics in the park were the kids could run play together, I wonted to host the best birthday parties and give my children everything they wonted. A tear slipped from the corner of my eye which broke me out of the deep thought, I quickly wiped away the tear and pulled out my compact and fixed my make up. Than I looked around where I was I noticed I had been walking for a while the sky was now black, clouds have covered the sky so I could not see the stars या the moon, all the सड़क, स्ट्रीट lights were on at this point and I could see that no one was on either side of the सड़क, स्ट्रीट I was completely alone, this made me anxious I didn’t know who could out here and what there intensions they had at what ever time it was, I briefly remember passing a सड़क, स्ट्रीट a few yards back I decided I would go back and re find my way home, I must have passed my सड़क, स्ट्रीट ages पूर्व with out even realizing, I should be घर सुरक्षित running of last मिनट wedding plans with my mother right now but instead I’m लॉस्ट along the back streets of the neighborhood, I walk back towards were I came from, I was walking for about 5 मिनटों before I passed the सड़क, स्ट्रीट I thought would take me back into the safety of the middle of the town. But to my disappointed it was only a short side street, I could just make out that there were four people walking towards the सड़क, स्ट्रीट I had been walking along for the last who knows how long. They were stumbling along, tripping over everything and nothing that got in their way of were they were headed towards, spilling their alcohol on their way. This couldn’t have been the सड़क, स्ट्रीट I thought I saw. I was going to continue walking the way I came when I heard one of them call my name.
“Rose!”
I stopped hesitantly, -I wouldn’t have stopped but only people I know personally and that are my good फ्रेंड्स know me द्वारा “Rose” everyone else called me “Rosalie”- turning my head to see that one of the men was jogging toward me. I was going to continue walking –thinking whoever it was would be too drunk to comprehend my whole name- when I noticed that all the four men were dressed to nice to be from around this neighborhood and must come from a higher class.
“Ah here’s my Rose” the man called again coming to a walk a few yard away from me.
“Royce?” I gasped as I recognized the man walking toward me, my दिल beat slowed as I knew I would be सुरक्षित with him around.
“The one and only” he कहा raising his arms sounding please of himself that I had recognized that it as him. As he came close enough to touch me I could smell the scotch, vodka, and various other alcohols lingering off his breath. I suddenly had a thought in the back of my mind that I had never seen him drink anything heavier than champagne at parties when they toasted, but he never really liked it -he liked something a lot stronger than champagne- and that he was too drunk to think reasonably for himself. My first instinct was to get him घर so he could sleep it off, this was definitely not something he did a lot, and I would feel worse not knowing he was going to be ok tomorrow. As he wrapped his arms around me and gave me a hug, almost pushing us to the ground when he लॉस्ट he balance I steadied him and he moved his grasp on me so one of his arms was around my around my body tucking me into his side –giving me a half hug- he spun us around facing the other three men who had almost caught up to us now, he started to pull me along with him while he yelled out to the other men, “look who came शामिल होइए us this time, my beautiful fiancé Rosalie”
“This time?” I कहा with out thinking, picking up on that he must do this quite often I suddenly felt anxious and scared of this side of Royce I never knew.
“Yes, this time, we do this every week, same time, same place, and same people” he replied, obviously not aware of what he was saying.
“Well sorry to inform आप dear, but I can’t stay this time I am supposed to be running over last मिनट wedding plans with my mother, and I’m terribly late as it is, so if आप don’t mind I must be heading off” I कहा quickly realizing I was probably safer on my own and that Royce would be ok because he did this quite often. But something I कहा must have aggravated him he tightened his hold on me and started walking faster so I couldn’t escape from him.
“Well than we have a problem, my boys and I were hoping for a little fun tonight and if आप leave than we don’t get to have our fun” as he was saying this I started feeling really nervous and scared for my life. I wonted to run, and scream for help, but knowing that Royce was a public image he would have to chose a location were no one would be around until early the अगला दिन या later so he could act so unacceptable, “you don’t wont us to have no fun and make me angry do you?, now your late and were cold” he laughed to the end of his sentence, we had caught up to the others द्वारा this time and he unleashed me from his tight hold spinning me so that I was in the middle of the four men. I could see the सड़क, स्ट्रीट that I had come from and that it was to far away for anyone to hear me scream if there was anyone around. I knew I wouldn’t be able to escape the four men as they are all bigger than me, and I was in the wrong shoes to try and run.
“Didn’t I tell आप John” Royce crowed “isn’t she lovelier than your Georgia Peaches” he laughed
“It’s hard to tell, she’s all covered up” he replied laughing and the other three men joined along, Royce pulled my arm closer toward him and for a सेकंड I thought, hoping that he would leave it at that and he would take me घर to safety, but all the hoping in the world couldn’t save me from the torture I was about to experience. Instead Royce grabbed the जैकेट that he had giving me as a gift and ripped it of me. The brass buttons went flying as they popped off जैकेट and scattered along the सड़क, स्ट्रीट almost missing the one called John.
“show them what आप look like, Rose!” ha laughed than tore off my hat pulling the hair pins so rough that they pulled some of my hair out द्वारा the roots, I screamed in pain as my hair fell to the side of face, -I knew exactly what my hair would look like, I liked to watch my self in the mirror at घर when I got ready for बिस्तर and I knew I looked hot when I just pulled my hair out of a bun like Royce did and the look on the guys faces’ conformed my assumption- the look that was in Royce’s eyes I had never seen him look at me like that before, for a विभाजित करें, विभक्त करें सेकंड I thought it was the look that I had always hoped would be in the eyes of my husband the night of our honey moon, but this look that Royce had was a much और evil look and I knew what was coming next.
As he grabbed me I struggled to free my self but that just excited him even more, he started to push me towards the dark forest that were on the outside of the town, when I heard one of the guys behind us called “she got और of a fight in her than the other girls” other girls? He’s done this before? This was not the Royce I knew how someone so kind and so thoughtful could have this evil side to him that I never knew about. As soon as we got into the dark edge of the forest Royce ripped the rest of the clothes of my back –leaving me exposed for every one to see- the other men laughed, -I never realized they had followed us into the forest until they laughed- at how scared I looked most likely, I could feel the expression on my face but I couldn’t chance it, my face was फ्रोज़न like that. All of a sudden Royce picked up one of the empty alcohol bottles from the ground and was holding it like a weapon. The अगला thing I saw he was plunging the bottle towards my head. I felt the bottle hit my head with such force that it sent me flying towards the ground. I heard the sharp loud crack from the bottle as it broke on the side of my head from the impact of the blow. My body hit the cold hard surface of the forest ground and I felt the little shards of the broken bottle fall on to my face. All the guys laughed hysterically. I tried to open my eye, but my sight was all blurry. I couldn’t make out anything. I reached for the side of my head, it was throbbing from the impact of the bottle and I felt the sticky moisture leaking from स्रोत of the pain. I tried to roll over onto my back when I heard someone say “she trying to get up, hasn’t she learnt anything?” all the four men laughed. Then Royce grabbed my arm with his right arm holding me to the ground. I could barely make out that he was couched down on one knee over me and with his left hand he was trying to take off his belt. I leaned my head back shutting my eyes swallowing. I didn’t realize but Royce had moved his head अगला to mine his mouth द्वारा my ear and whispered “Don’t be nervous Rose I’ve done this many times before. You’ll be out cold for the worst of it” than chuckled softly I felt another blow to my head and I was out cold like he promised.
I was only out cold for a short time I have never imagined my first time would be like this. I tried to pretend that I was still out cold when I awoke but my emotions failed me and a tear ran down my face. I heard one of the guys say
“Ah she’s awake I was hoping she wouldn’t still be out when it’s my turn” I opened my eyes to see who कहा that and to my surprise Royce wasn’t on चोटी, शीर्ष of me like I thought. He was over द्वारा one of the trees with another bottle of booze in his hands laughing along with the other guys at my shocked expression. I was being past around like a piece of meat. I swallowed again knowing I wouldn’t be able to stop this even if I tried they would just knock me out cold before I even got to my feet and continue doing what they pleased to me so I just lay there taking everything they gave me. I started to think of the other girls that had been victims to this unlawful act. And not know how they could not speak up and say anything to anyone. I thought about how they must feel violated, assumed, embarrassed, and unloved I knew I felt like that right now along with wonting to die, angry, upset, confused, used, and many other emotions that only last a few सेकंड्स than changes to anger. I must have passed out again because the अगला thing I knew was I was waking up from the cold wind, and I could see the four dark figures walking away from me and the closest one throw a rock towards my head, just clipping me enough to shut my eye, my eyes felt heavier than the first night I stayed up till dawn -marveling at the diamond ring on my left hand Royce had दिया me the दिन before. I was so happy that night my mother even कहा my eyes sparkled like hers- even though I couldn’t see anything I could hear what the four “strangers” were saying while they retreaded away from my cold body which was left to die.
“That should do it”
“She will be dead before anyone finds her anyway”
“She was fun at first”
“Royce, आप definitely pick the feisty ones”
“It’s not a challenge if they allow आप to do it”
I heard them stumble and fall over something on the side of the सड़क, स्ट्रीट were they came from. I tried not to listen to the टिप्पणियाँ they had made या try to let them effect me but it didn’t work once the first tear slipped from the side of my eye I couldn’t stop. I just lay there waiting for death to come.
I plugged in my headphones, hoping it would help to pass the अगला ten to fifteen मिनटों of the flight, and listened to the lullaby i had composed for my sweetheart. My दिल was already broken - might as well break it some more.
I hummed the tune of Bella's lullaby, and felt eyes passangers on my face, as my lips trembled and my eyelids twitched to a close. I imagined Bella and I dancing at the prom last year. I managed a bare smile as i noticed Bellas feet lifted from the floor. But the smile faded as she collapsed to the ground and her heartbeat came to a halt, That was NOT supposed to happen....
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Chapter 4: Of Panthers and Goddesses

“Nessie!” Zafrina crooned as she caught me in a warm embrace. “I am so glad that आप came!” She exclaimed, she turned to Jacob and hugged him as well. “Thank आप for sharing her on your honeymoon”. He grinned at her. I felt my stomach rumbling again and I clasped it. “I am so hungry,” I confessed. Jake smiled at me alright lets go get आप something then. I looked at him and smiled, “No, I’m और thirsty than hungry…I want to hunt.” I turned back to Zafrina, “Do आप mind it will only take a little bit”. She looked at me curiosity...
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NIGHTFALL





“As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there's a twilight where everything remains seemingly unchanged, and it is in such twilight that we must be aware of change in the air, however slight, lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.”
-William Orville Douglas


* I पोस्टेड pictures of the dresses in the image section of my spot "lovethecullens" check it out!



Chapter 1: For as long as we both shall exist… (Nessie's POV)

I was surrounded द्वारा brightness, as though in a dream. I looked down at the Oscar De La Renta गाउन that my Aunt Alice...
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posted by renesmeblack
Okay, आप know that extensive trip my dad told me about? Well, I found out from Alice that it wasn't France at all! It's this area called Isle Esme. Whatever that means. Jasper had to come over last night to calm Jacob down enough to sleep. Talk about embarrassing! I called renesmeblack to come over tomorrow, because she was on an Australia expidition या something. She's coming back घर tonight. Here's what she'l probably talk about:

1. The totally hot surfers she saw
2. The खाना she tried there
3. The totally hot lifeguard that saved her when she "drowned"
4. The service at the hotels
5. The totally hot boy that stayed in the suite across from her
6. My Uncle Emmett (He and Rosalie are there for a "honeymoon.")
7.The totally hot surfers she saw the अगला day
8. The toilets flush backwards.
9. Blabbity Blab Blah... Did I mention the surfers?!!!

Okay, the phone's ringing and I bet that's her. Later!
posted by Bella_Swan3
-Rosalie-

I was NOT thrilled when Carlisle announced that we were going on a "camping" trip. Ew. I prefer to eat on hunting trips, then IMMEDIATELY return home. It meant that we had to "rough it" for potentially three days. Emphasis on the "EW".

I didn't really have problem with camping, just the lack of running water, civilisation, my walk-in closet, laptop, and various other technology.

Therefore, I HATE CAMPING.

Edward, who was a few strides ahead of me, began laughing, and, clearing my head of thoughts, I sped up to him, and knocked him flat before he knew what I was doing.

It wasn't every...
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Bella's POV

During our खोजिए Edward and I are getting very worried. There aren't any tracks या blood in our usual hunting area. Both of us are not hungry since we went hunting a few hours ago. So we decided to pick up Renesmee at the border line at La Push and come back to our cottage. I'm also starting to miss Jacob. It's been awhile since we talked to each other.

I told Edward to stay at our cottage and I will go to La Push myself. I went about 120 mph getting to La Push using my Ferrari. I guess I am use to Edward's crazy driving. Once I slamed the door and saw the red house, I see Jacob...
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posted by Edward_lover101
 Jacob and Reneseme: reunited
Jacob and Reneseme: reunited
I was a train reck. My daughter was missing, I still had to plan my wedding. All of a sudden the phone rang.
"Hello?"
"Listen to me. If आप want to see your daughter alive आप will follow these instrotions. Do आप under stand?"
"Yes, tell me what I need to do and I'll do it."
" 1: आप must go to 1234 Lake blv. In Mishicn.
2: Only आप and Edward may be at these location.
3: If आप bring anyone but Edward. आप will not see Reneseme alive." How did he know my daughters name?
"Do आप understand?"
"Yes."
"I'll see आप in a few days, या आप will never see your daughter again." The line went dead. I made...
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posted by just_bella
I know I कहा the call would be in the last one but I couldn't make it fit...so it's in this one instead!! Thanks everyone!! Please टिप्पणी दे :)

End Of Chapter 20

I finally focused on her eyes, the fear दिखा रहा है everywhere on my face. "Edward," was all I could get out.

I watched as Bella's face tried to figure out what was going on. She took a few gasping breaths before she started to fall, Jacob swearing loudly as he tried to catch her.

He growled quietly at me and started screaming. "What the hell! What did आप do to her? Bella!!" He कहा as he ran her over to the couch.

"Bella? Bella, snap out...
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pictures below :D Enjoy my story :D

Bella's pov

We finally arrived at my cabin. We went inside and Renesmee walked straight into her room. Mason on the other hand he walked straight to the TV. It just felt like nothing happened before if I saw them like that.
“Bella, are आप okay” Esme asked me sweet.
“I’m fine, I guess I’m going to take a shower. If आप don’t mind” I asked her friendly
“Of course not, go ahead. We’ll wait here” she answered back and I walked into my bedroom.
I took a deep breath while starring at the बिस्तर but focused myself back towards the bathroom.

I walked into...
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it's a long story, I couldn't विभाजित करें, विभक्त करें this up in 2 :D so enjoy

Bella's pov

I saw Aro sitting in the सोफ़ा, सोफे with Caius, Demetri and Felix अगला to him. Where are Jane and Alec I wondered. Suddenly I heard Mason screaming. I looked up and saw Jane and Alec holding Mason tight.
I felt Edward squeezing my hand very tight but didn’t let go. I realised my breathing was increased. I had a hard time controlling myself.
I squeezed his hand very hard and he looked at me. I moved my lips
“What are आप done” I कहा without giving a tone.
“Trust me” he कहा back in a whisper
“I do trust you, but do you...
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posted by just_bella
Just wanted to say thank आप to everyone who reads these. The टिप्पणियाँ are so much fun to read!!

End of Part 23

"I heard everyone talking about leaving, and I was wondering do आप think I could go see my family before we left..if we have to leave?" I asked.

"Emmett, this is the hardest part of being one of us. I'm sorry, आप can't go back. Not now...not ever. Unfortunately your family thinks आप are dead." He कहा quietly.

"They..They think I'm dead?" I whispered.

"Yes, Edward went to them and told them that your body was in town. That आप were mauled द्वारा a भालू and the body had been brought...
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i think i was t dedicat this to the first person who टिप्पणी जोड़ा गया हे on chaper 4 sdo this chapter s dedicated to just_bella...thank आप for your support the अगला one is coming today too because this took a while...sorry.....im going to keep that up, the first person who टिप्पणियाँ get a dedication. so that means review as much as possible......plz plz..thank you!


Chapter 5 Keith (Bella’s P.O.V.)

“Well Bella, before I got turned I was working as a salesman.” he कहा to me with a lot of interest.

“My dad was dead and my mother was working at a bar. She wasn’t घर very much and when she did she...
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Last one for today, because i'm going to बिस्तर it was a very exhausted day/week :-) Enjoy and i'll be back tomorrow :D

Bella's pov

It felt so long. I was just laying here, hearing different things. Till I heard something familiar, it was Edward’s voice.
“Bella, my love, I know आप can hear me, please don’t leave me, please keep fighting for me, for Mason, for Renesmee and for everyone else. Please, आप need to wake up.” I could hear his pain, his snobs.
I kind of panicked but still Edward’s voice worked soothing. I wanted to open my eyes but I still couldn’t, was I afraid to open my eyes,...
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I'll put another one later today, because me and my family are celebrating a birthday :D

Bella's pov

“Stop struggling, your not going to get away from me” He कहा determined
I didn’t say anything I just looked at him with disgusted. But I started to see a smile on his face.
“I’m being impolite, my name is Franco” he कहा calm but I still didn’t say anything. I still couldn’t हटाइए from the pain I was feeling, what did he do to me to cause so much pain.
“You know, I think there would be a possibility that you’re stronger than me if आप use magic” he कहा amused.
“Magic, how...
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posted by just_bella
Hi!!! Ok here's a recap from what happened last time:

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
It's time." Father said.

He came over and hugged me roughly, it was very awkward. It was like he didn't want to touch me but felt it was what I needed.

Mother came over अगला and knelt down in front of me. "We will be back soon, don't be scared. Dr. Gordon कहा that they will take very good care of आप and he will watch out for आप personally." She कहा as she hugged me tightly.

Cynthia came over last. The tears flowing down her face. We hadn't been apart for और then one दिन and both of us...
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Chapter 23: A Date…
Shopping with Renesmee and her mom, grandma and aunts was so fun. I ended up with a beautiful sleeveless white गाउन that shimmered. Nessie teasingly referred to is as a “vampire skin dress” much to the chagrin of her family. She on the other hand went for a golden one shouldered dress. It looked like the dress of a goddess, which was appropriate as she was gleeful over the prospect of her new found power. The rest of the week was uneventful at school everyone was excited for homecoming. Jeff didn’t so much as make eye contact with either one of us! The only interesting...
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posted by just_bella
Ok I wasn't sure where to take this...I've asked a few people and here's what I've decided. Please टिप्पणी दे and ENJOY!!

Ok Last Time on Emmett:

"In the beginning it was just Carlisle, I will tell आप that story another day. He was alone for a very long time, he needed someone. He came across Edward in a Hospital in Chicago. Edward was dying of Spanish Influenza and had his family ha died before him. Carlisle changed him, I'm not sure how but Edward has a special thing." She कहा as she grinned evilly.

I had a feeling that those two were close, but still there was something between them that they...
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a friend ask me to put a vampire hunter into the story, i was first planning to make another one first, but i found a place to put him in :D

Bella's pov

I heard growling and Dorian stopped चुंबन me. I was never that happy when he stopped but when we looked up to see who was growling I saw Edward. In his eyes was pain and anger. I will never forgive myself for this. Dorian was still holding my pulse very tight so i couldn’t go anywhere and he was just laughing.
“Too late, she’s mine now” Dorian कहा to Edward
I saw Carlisle and Alice arriving after Edward, I saw Emmett and Jasper arrive...
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posted by lovethecullens
Chapter 17: Hung Jury

After Sienna walked out there were some fiery debates over what we were going to do. My father was very quiet; I felt that this was painful to him as it reminded him of what he went through with my mother. “I think that we should hold off on changing her until Alice sees that the Volturi know” My father said. “No Edward,” my mother argued. “If Sienna is willing we need to change her as soon as possible. It is too dangerous, I am not going to risk her life on चोटी, शीर्ष of the fact that we really don’t need to be drawing attention to ourselves from the Volturi if we...
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Warning: This is just my कल्पना coming through. And some information to you; the story plays before Bella became a Vampire and there is no Nessie in sight. So its just for our little Jacob's sake, he needs some luving.

A new kind of Life...
Again i woke up to that awful smell, it burnt in my nose and made me shiver. It had been a weird week, and i still wasnt used to my life the way it was right now. I had moved into the Cullen house, not having any other place to go anyhow. LaPush was a no go, Sam had all the ways to make me stay away from Kristine.- but so far he didnt try. Then again i hadnt...
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