"Matthew tells me you're improving. Guess that brings us a step closer to being happy again, right?" Charlie stared at me with a hopeful expression, awaiting the answer he wanted to hear all along. Yes, Charlie. I'm finally moving on from the past because I प्यार you. I प्यार आप and I want to make this work. I'm changing who I am for you. Dr. Thomas' words, his advice, echoed in my head as I slowly paced back and forth, playing with my fingers nervously. "Jamie, what is it?" "Do आप think there's any point in staying married if the relationship isn't going to survive?" I blurted out the words before I could think to stop myself. "I mean, let's face it Charlie... Are we even strong enough to want to fight for this?" An irritated undertone just barely touched the question.
Charlie stood from the सोफ़ा, सोफे and stepped closer to me, once again towering over me - making me feel smaller than I should have felt. "I thought आप told me आप wanted to try," he whispered, masking the hurt as much as he could, but he wasn't fooling anyone. "I thought आप wanted to make this work." I shook my head in disagreement, crossing my arms over my chest. "No, Charlie. You wanted me to try." He stepped away from me, visibly struck द्वारा my response. "Why are आप अभिनय like this, Jamie?" "Because I'm trying to get through to you! आप keep अभिनय as if nothing is wrong and that everything will get better! I'm tired, Charlie, really tired. I can't do it anymore... I won't."
Now the irritation was taking its toll on him as well. Without holding back any longer, Charlie released all the anger and frustration built up inside him for the past month. "Goddamnit, Jamie!" He slammed his hand on the coffee table, causing me to jump. "Why can't आप just get a hold on reality and face it! He's gone! Alexander is gone and he's not coming back!" My tone matched his in volume. "Stop saying that! आप don't know, I don't know! Nobody knows what will happen, but I'm willing to wait!" "Why?! Why are आप waiting for him when आप could be helping me out here?! It takes two people to have a healthy marriage, Jamie! Two!" "You're telling me I need to get a hold on reality? Fuck you! You're the one who can't see what's really going on! You're being greedy, Charlie! आप want what आप can't have!"
I kept pushing just to see how long it took for him to finally break - something we both needed. "I bring आप all the way up here thinking that maybe, just maybe, you'd see how much I would crawl to make आप want me again. I was wrong about you... about us. You're right, Jamie, there's no point. There's absolutely no point anymore. I just can't understand why आप waited all this time to tell me आप want out." I lowered my gaze to my feet, my toes sinking into the softness of the carpet. "Because it took me until now to realize how much I प्यार him." Charlie shook his head, disappointed with my fantasy. "Well, that's it then."
He grabbed his sunglasses and car keys, heading for the front door. "Where are आप go?" I didn't really care; I just didn't want to be left at his parents' house. He stopped and turned around to face me. "I'm going for a drive. आप can pack your things while I'm gone. I'll drive आप to the airport when I come back... I won't be long." As soon as he slammed the front door, I reached for the telephone and dialed Matthew's number.
Charlie stood from the सोफ़ा, सोफे and stepped closer to me, once again towering over me - making me feel smaller than I should have felt. "I thought आप told me आप wanted to try," he whispered, masking the hurt as much as he could, but he wasn't fooling anyone. "I thought आप wanted to make this work." I shook my head in disagreement, crossing my arms over my chest. "No, Charlie. You wanted me to try." He stepped away from me, visibly struck द्वारा my response. "Why are आप अभिनय like this, Jamie?" "Because I'm trying to get through to you! आप keep अभिनय as if nothing is wrong and that everything will get better! I'm tired, Charlie, really tired. I can't do it anymore... I won't."
Now the irritation was taking its toll on him as well. Without holding back any longer, Charlie released all the anger and frustration built up inside him for the past month. "Goddamnit, Jamie!" He slammed his hand on the coffee table, causing me to jump. "Why can't आप just get a hold on reality and face it! He's gone! Alexander is gone and he's not coming back!" My tone matched his in volume. "Stop saying that! आप don't know, I don't know! Nobody knows what will happen, but I'm willing to wait!" "Why?! Why are आप waiting for him when आप could be helping me out here?! It takes two people to have a healthy marriage, Jamie! Two!" "You're telling me I need to get a hold on reality? Fuck you! You're the one who can't see what's really going on! You're being greedy, Charlie! आप want what आप can't have!"
I kept pushing just to see how long it took for him to finally break - something we both needed. "I bring आप all the way up here thinking that maybe, just maybe, you'd see how much I would crawl to make आप want me again. I was wrong about you... about us. You're right, Jamie, there's no point. There's absolutely no point anymore. I just can't understand why आप waited all this time to tell me आप want out." I lowered my gaze to my feet, my toes sinking into the softness of the carpet. "Because it took me until now to realize how much I प्यार him." Charlie shook his head, disappointed with my fantasy. "Well, that's it then."
He grabbed his sunglasses and car keys, heading for the front door. "Where are आप go?" I didn't really care; I just didn't want to be left at his parents' house. He stopped and turned around to face me. "I'm going for a drive. आप can pack your things while I'm gone. I'll drive आप to the airport when I come back... I won't be long." As soon as he slammed the front door, I reached for the telephone and dialed Matthew's number.
Dear Well....You,
I प्यार you, आप know that? I think your absolutely astounding, and amazing, and I hope आप never change. आप make my दिन in every way, and as far as now, you’ve been completely supportive.
I प्यार how when I shiver just a bit, आप hand me your sweater.
I प्यार how आप किस my cheek when I blush.
I प्यार आप how आप smell, and how आप taste.
I प्यार how आप tell me I’m beautiful, even when I look like crap.
I प्यार how when I’m just the tiniest bit scared, आप tell me everything’s going to be alright.
I प्यार how when आप speak, sometimes, the most awkwardness things come out, and we joke about it.
I प्यार how when I mess up my words, आप tease me about it, but don’t make a big deal.
I प्यार how आप किस me.
I प्यार आप completely
Please never change.
प्यार Me
I प्यार you, आप know that? I think your absolutely astounding, and amazing, and I hope आप never change. आप make my दिन in every way, and as far as now, you’ve been completely supportive.
I प्यार how when I shiver just a bit, आप hand me your sweater.
I प्यार how आप किस my cheek when I blush.
I प्यार आप how आप smell, and how आप taste.
I प्यार how आप tell me I’m beautiful, even when I look like crap.
I प्यार how when I’m just the tiniest bit scared, आप tell me everything’s going to be alright.
I प्यार how when आप speak, sometimes, the most awkwardness things come out, and we joke about it.
I प्यार how when I mess up my words, आप tease me about it, but don’t make a big deal.
I प्यार how आप किस me.
I प्यार आप completely
Please never change.
प्यार Me
I sit in the dark. Thinking about Jack. A single tear comes out of my eye, then another. I start to laugh quietly, trying not to wake up my sister. Then, the horrible memory from my awful dream came back to me. I went to the door and paused. I sighed and told myself that nothing is out there but the hallway, the dining room, living room and the kitchen. I took out my phone from my जैकेट and looked at the time. It's 5:59. I rolled my eyes and opened and closed the door quietly and sat on the soft couch. I started to drift into thoughts about Degrassi, and what it would be like if I went there. Then, a black figure moved across the kitchen. Spooked, I quickly walked to my aunts' laptop and looked up some funny वीडियो on youtube.com to keep m off track from the figure. Hours passed, and I am still freaked. Ten मिनटों later, I calm down and look up some और funny stuff. Ugh! I must be haluccinating from lack of sleep. I rubbed my eyes and went back to my bedroom and passed out.
