“Don’t आप really want to go?” Jenny asked. All freshmen were invited to attend an acquaintance party that will be held in the gym.

“I don’t feel like partying, Jen.”

“Come on, Nessie. It would be fun. Don’t tell me you’re still mad at me?”

I sighed. I am not mad, just annoyed out of my wits. I still can’t believe Jenny had pulled that cheap stunt in the cafeteria during lunch.

* * *

We were looking for a table, carrying our tray when she started babbling about her misery about her boyfriend Paul. He still hadn’t called her. I was thinking of something to say to soothe her when I realized too late that it was just a ploy.

I can’t believe I was too slow to catch on until we were standing in front of a तालिका, टेबल that has a lone occupant. Jen was grinning widely while my whole face was टमाटर red. I almost hissed at my new found friend.

“Hi! Can we शामिल होइए you?” She asked him brightly.

He stared at her as if she’s out of her mind and proceeded to glare menacingly at me.

Jenny was undaunted. She placed her tray on the तालिका, टेबल and sat on the chair without waiting for his consent. Then, she pulled me down to follow suit. I sat leadenly beside her. I wish the ground would open and निगलना, निगल, निगल संकलन me up right this very instant.

He pushed his tray away. “You could have the तालिका, टेबल द्वारा yourselves. I just लॉस्ट my appetite.” He growled, looking pointedly at me. Then he left without a background glance.

I fought the tears and gripped the table’s edge too tightly. The wood almost splintered. I tried to blink back the tears that threatened to spill from the corners of my eyes. I took a deep breath.

I saw that Jenny was still staring at the place where he went. I quickly composed my face and tried to pull off a nonchalant mask. I was not as good as my father in hiding emotions so I bowed my head down and started to spear the macaroni with my fork.

* * *

“I told आप for the hundredth time, Jenny, I’m not mad at you. Just promise me आप won’t pull me into an embarrassing situation like that ever again.”

“Okay. Okay. I promise. Don’t fret.” She said, her left hand raised.

I rolled my eyes. “You’re going to be late. या is that the plan – be fashionably late and make a grand entrance?”

“My…my…aren’t we being grouchy? You’ll be perfect together, आप know? He’s a good-looking bad tempered recluse and you’re a gorgeous grouch. A match made in heaven.”

I threw a तकिया at her. “Get out या I’ll drag आप over to that party myself!”

She laughed, about to say what I’m sure of is a cheeky reply, but decided against it when she took in my murderous glare.

She blew a किस my way before leaving the room. I lay on my बिस्तर and stared at the ceiling. I absolutely have nothing to do tonight. I have finished all my homework earlier. They were a piece of cake.

I stared long and hard on the cell phone resting on चोटी, शीर्ष of my bedside table. I knew that I should give my parents a call but what would I tell them? ‘Guess what, Dad? The object of my nightmare is also a student here and treated me like a plague.’ That wouldn’t do. My father, even without my Mom’s bidding, would definitely haul me out of Dartmouth before I could even bat an eyelash.

There is only one person in the whole Universe that I would want to talk to whenever I felt confused या lonely या angry with myself या combination of all three. I took out the picture hidden underneath my pillow. It was a picture I deliberated on whether to bring with me या not. The picture of the man I प्यार and who used to प्यार me back.

“Hey, I miss you, आप know…” I stared at his eyes almost willing him to answer back so his deep warm voice could thaw out the icicles that hung in every chamber of my heart.

I sighed and returned the picture in its hiding place. Before I could pull myself in misery, I decided to take an evening stroll – a perfect thing to do on a night like this. The night was serene, the breeze pleasantly warm, the full moon shone brightly though the stars don’t twinkle the way they used to, at least not for me.

I stayed away from the path that leads to the gym; afraid I might bump into my eager classmates and find myself being dragged to the party. I decided to take the path leading to a small beautiful garden at the back of one of the older buildings.

My feet hurried as my ears heard soft, sweet familiar sound. It was the haunting, melancholic melody of the violin again.

Sitting on one of the stone bench, his back to me was the man I dreaded to be near to. I almost turned away but his beautiful संगीत stopped me.

He was लॉस्ट in his music. His eyes gently closed, the black shiny violin nestled under his chin, his bow caressed the strings expertly.

The violin cried a soft, sweet, haunting sound - like a lament to unrequited love. His face held the softest expression. My hands itched to touch his beautiful face. I haven’t realized his संगीत has already brought me to tears until I heard myself sniffling.

The संगीत stopped and his back immediately became rigid. I heard his teeth gnash. His hand gripped the violin tightly. I was afraid it would snap.

I wanted to flee. I don’t want to see his hostility at a time when I already felt so low but my stupid feet remained rooted on the ground.

He stood up gracefully from the bench. I expect him to just ignore me and just walk past me. He surprised me when he tossed me a black square thing. I was relieved my reflexes were still with me even though my mind decided to abandon me yet again. It was a black handkerchief with सोना chain-like pattern around the edges.

“Wipe your tears away. It disgusts me to see a woman crying.” He drawled.

Blood rushed to my face. How dare he?!

I quickly brushed the tears away with the back of my fists. Without thinking, I threw the handkerchief squarely to his chest. “I don’t need your stupid hanky!”

I began to stomp away.

“Don’t आप know it’s not polite to throw things at other people? It’s also against proper conduct not to say thank आप या didn’t your parents taught आप that?”

I growled. Stupid arrogant violinist. I wished to throw something heavier at him - a boulder perhaps?

“I should be the one angry, आप know. आप decided to barge here in my garden and ruin my concentration with your sniffles.”

I turned to face him.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know this garden is your private property. Is there a sign somewhere with your name on it? I must have missed it!” I was shaking with anger now. If I was a werewolf, I swear I would have phased right now.

I don’t know what it is about this arrogant man that made me experience such extreme emotions. Fear. Annoyance. Admiration. And now, Anger.

He chuckled. My anger was stopped short only to be replaced द्वारा irritation. What?! Is he making fun of me now? My eyes narrowed into slits.

He roared with laughter. “I see that आप got one hell of a temper.”

“And I see आप got one hell of a problem with your personality!” I snapped back.

His smile froze, all the amusement gone from his face. His eyes became hard and cold at once.

“I only got a problem with you.” He murmured. “I wish आप didn’t exist at all.”

Shock stiffened my entire body. I saw a brief flash of despair in his eyes before he walked away without another word. I ran away from the garden. It was too dark now for anyone to see me dash like a leopardess. I climbed up my window agilely, tears still streaming down my face. I don’t want to face the friendly, chatty dorm keeper downstairs.

I saw my phone give out its last vibration. I leaped noiselessly and landed softly on my bed, cell phone already on hand but I already missed the call.

My दिल sank. I immediately dialed the number with trembling fingers…I tried six, seven times – no answer. I let the phone slip from my fingers and drop on the floor.

I can't believe I just missed his call. I would trade everything just to turn back time - just a couple of मिनटों - so that I could finally hear his voice.

“Why?! Why?!” I wailed, punching my pillow.

“Jacob…Jacob…” I whimpered.

He finally called me - a part of me rejoiced. Why did he? What did he want to tell me? I shouldn’t have bickered with that arrogant violinist.

“I hate him! I absolutely hate him!”

“Is it me या this Jacob person?” a voice softly asked in the darkness of my room.

I whirled around and saw him sitting crossed leg on the window ledge.

“Y – YOU!” I stammered.

“Is that answer to my सवाल or…”

I growled cutting him off. “What are आप doing here?! Who told आप that आप could come here without an invitation?!”

“I came to apologize. What I कहा in the garden, that was a very rude thing to say.”

“You have apologized. Now, please leave.”

He sighed and didn’t हटाइए an inch. I closed my eyes and fought for control. My eyes flew open when I felt him standing in front of me. He softly held my face with his left hand. He gently brushed the tears away. His fingers burned my skin, sent tingles to my spine.

He stared deeply into my eyes. “I would do everything in my power to leave आप alone, to stay away from you.” He vowed.

I closed my eyes. Tears streaming incessantly down my face. Why do they always want to stay away from me?

“I wish I had it in me to stay away from you.” He softly whispered.

I opened my eyes and he was gone. I crumpled on my bed. I don’t know who I’m sobbing for – Jacob and our wasted प्यार या Him for obviously messing around with my sanity. A fresh wave of sobs wracked my whole body. Why should I even cry over him?

The melancholic melody of the violin wafted through the open window. I banged the window shut, threw myself on the बिस्तर then covered my face with my pillow.

Broken sobs are the only संगीत for me tonight.