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Can आप read the first chapter of my story?

Okay, so i got an account on Mibba.com, and i started लेखन a story called "Why Me?" about a girl who has to हटाइए from Tennessee, to Illinois. She's psychic, and in this first chapter she learned that her boyfriend is cheating on her with her BEST FRIEND.
Here it is: link
Please tell me why या why not आप like it, and tell me what i could do to fix it?
Thanks :)
 LinaJC posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना
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lemoncurry said:
Pretty good. Pretty good. I thought it was interesting but maybe that's just because I've never read a book that has to do with this "predict the future" kind of stuff since it really isn't my cup of चाय but I liked this plenty.



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posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना 
SongBirdTeam said:
no actualy i cant, i keep clicking on the link and it says that the story doesn't exist. i bet it's freaking awsome though. ;)
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posted एक साल  से अधिक पुराना 
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