Post an arguement/conversation you've had with an inanimate object.

OHMYGOD, LAMP
I HATE YOU
YOU'RE SUCH A DOUCHE
WHY CAN'T आप TURN OFF WHEN I CLAP
DAMMIT
KILL YOURSELF.

time is not my friend:) it didn't say anything back but kept moving and i got really pissed.

I yell at my TV all the time.
I remember this one time this ad came on...
Ad: "Do आप ever feel-"
Me: "LIKE A PLASTIC BAG?!"
Ad: "- pain in your abdominal muscles?"
Me: "Oh yeah. Like once a month..."

And then the power went off. xD

Just about all electronic devices (such as my computer who hates me with a passion) I yell at.

"WORK, DANG YOU! DON'T BLINK THAT 'NOT RESPONDING' MESSAGE AT ME! I KNOW YOU'RE JUST BEING SMART! NOW WORK!"

Yep, that's usually how my दिन starts with my computer. =)

Ad: Find other gay matches!
Me: I'm not gay!
Ad: Both guys and girls!
Me: SHUT UP!
Ad: Don't be ashamed of who आप are.
Me: I AM NOT GAY SHUT THE FRICK UP!

iPod: (not turning off)
Me: TURN OFF ALREADY!
iPod: (not turning off)
Me: THIS IS THE THIRD TIME ALREADY!
iPod: (locked)
Me: oooooooooohhhhhh..........

Me: Stapler, why don't आप staple people's fingers on a regular basis?
Stapler: That would be mean.
Me: But it's funny!
Stapler: आप have violence issues.
Computer: No, she just has issues. आप should see her emails.
Me: HEY!
Printer: Well, she's helpful sometimes. I was jammed once....
Me: THANK you.
Printer: But before she fixed it she was hitting me, HARD.
Me: Oh, god.
Stapler: Nika, आप need professional help.
Computer: And medication.
Printer: Yes, medication and help.
Me: Why? I like my weirdness!
Computer: आप also have an obsession with Jak-
Me: DON'T SAY IT! I've had seven people tell me already.
Stapler: Then why did आप print out that picture of him talking to food?
Me: It was funny!
Printer: It was kinda funny. But she is obsessed with him.
Stapler: Yep.
Computer: Yeah.
Me: I GIVE UP! (Goes to TV)
TV: Really, you're watching Prince of Persia AGAIN?
Me: I like this!
TV: आप have watched it too many times!
Me: So?
TV: आप are seriously obsessed with J-
Me: NO SHUT UP! I like Gemma Arterton, too!
TV: Don't watch it again. Please.
Me: STOP CONTROLLING MY LIFE! I ALREADY HATE आप FOR FORGETTING TO TAPE NIKITA!
TV: I'm calling your doctor. आप need meds.

Me: What. The. Foopledoodlesmackapoodle. STOP BEING A JERKFACE, COMPUTER!!!

Computer: But...it's my hobby...;'3

Me: I DON'T CARE आप ANNOYING TWIT! WORKWORKWORKWORK--

Computer: Don't tell me what to do, आप didn't create me. :3

Me: HOW ABOUT THIS?! *Hits computer with fist*

Computer: Owwie! DX *Whines like a baby*

Me: हटाइए YOUR ASS!

Chair:

Me: I MEAN IT! I DON'T STAND IN YOUR WAY!

Chair:


Me: Oh, you're asking for it now!

Chair:


Me: Fuck आप *kicks over chair*



20 min later...

Me: *picks chair up* Sorry about that. I'm kinda on my period...

Me: Stupid computer! आप made them spell "argument" wrong!

Bananaaddict's com: no I didn't, they did it on their own.

Me: that's just what English teachers want आप to think.