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Chapter 2—A New Day…A New Chapter
    Right अगला to the right one…what if आप are, and आप just don’t know it? या आप know it, and they don’t? That’s quite a pickle…why do they say that? Why is it a pickle? Why not say “oh, that’s quite a scone!” या “what a क्रैनबेरी muffin!” ah…so confusing. So I think that if आप are going on a bike ride आप don’t need to wear a helmet, आप just need to wear one of those big hard headbands. That’s because I was riding in this really short car down a bumpy road and I hit my head on the ceiling. But it didn’t...
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added by nelena_rox
5
what happens when a five साल old says f***? this might insult ppg luvers
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posted by DoctorSpud
I actually cried coming up with this speech last night...I think it was even और beautiful when I first came up with it.

If आप were to think like me and look through multiple viewpoints of life and existence heck even trillions of different viewpoints from the stars to the planets and everything inbetween and beyond even through your best फ्रेंड्स eyes आप would be blown away.
If आप were to sit and truly think about it all आप would realize that people come up with the formulas and the math and the science even though none of it exists. They try to stabilize existence and make it pure intel...
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posted by grasshopper101
3
Okay so one दिन my mom was घर alone and she walked into the house and there was a गिलहरी sitting on the couch. My mom started screaming and the गिलहरी started flying all over the house!! She stood on the back of the सोफ़ा, सोफे and the गिलहरी flew all around her and she was like so scared!!! She called my dad and told him to come घर so he did and then when he walked in the door he got my remote car and it finally flew out the door!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!!! She was scared every night to go to sleep for like 8 weeks cause she thought the गिलहरी was in her bed!!!
posted by cheeeese
13
yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyyyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyyyy
 Ahhhhhh
Ahhhhhh
1. Wait, why do we need to learn this?

2. Learning hurts my head!

3.Yeah, I was listening I just wasn't paying attion.

4.Why do we get homework and आप don't?!

5. I'm sorry I didn't hear the question, I was to busy drawing funny pictures of you.

6. *They ask आप a question* Ummm Ummm Your FACE!

7. Wait! Can I erase the board?

8. When do we start Sex Ed.? *raise eye brows*

9. TEACHER!?! I HAVE TO PEE!!!!

10. I missed what आप कहा right there. I wasn't paying attion.

11. I have this great diet plan. आप should try it.

12. Oooooo Ahhhhh, What were आप talking about I was to busy Oooing and Ahhhing.

13. Does...
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I found this link. This will last आप days. XD


Between 1942 and 1944, Academy Awards were made of plaster.

John Madden is an accomplished ballroom dancer.


One out of three employees who received a promotion use a coffee mug with the company logo on it.


About a third of all Americans flush the toilet while they're still sitting on it.

According to Genesis 1:20-22 the chicken came before the egg.

Soldiers from every country salute with their right hand.

The microwave ओवन was invented द्वारा mistake when an engineer testing a magnetron tube noticed that the radiation from it melted the चॉकलेट bar he...
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I found this link. This will last आप days. XD


Between 1942 and 1944, Academy Awards were made of plaster.

John Madden is an accomplished ballroom dancer.


One out of three employees who received a promotion use a coffee mug with the company logo on it.


About a third of all Americans flush the toilet while they're still sitting on it.

According to Genesis 1:20-22 the chicken came before the egg.

Soldiers from every country salute with their right hand.

The microwave ओवन was invented द्वारा mistake when an engineer testing a magnetron tube noticed that the radiation from it melted the चॉकलेट bar he...
continue reading...
posted by i_luv_angst
19
65 above zero:
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Wisconsin plant gardens.

60 above zero:
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Wisconsin sunbathe.

50 above zero:
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Wisconsin drive with the windows down.

40 above zero:
Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Wisconsin throw on a flannel shirt.

35 above zero:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Wisconsin have the last cookout before it gets cold.

20 above Zero
People in Miami all die.
Wisconsinites close the windows.

Zero:
Californians fly away to Mexico...
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found this on the net:

13 Fun Things To Do To Get Salespeople on the Phone to Hang Up

1. If they want to loan आप money, tell them आप just filed for bankruptcy and आप could sure use some money. Ask, "How long can I keep it? Do I have to ever pay it back, या is it like the other money I borrowed before my bankruptcy?"

2. If आप get one of those pushy people who won't shut up, just listen to their sales pitch. When they try to close the sale, tell them that you'll need to go get your credit card. Then, just set the phone down and go do laundry, shopping या whatever. See how long that commission...
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I am pondering this question, it is a very difficult one to figure out. I can not seem to think of anything to make an लेखाए on....

2 Hours Later

Wait I think I have an idea coming on... nope I लॉस्ट it... wait no I found it again... What if I write an लेख about reasons why आप should do pointe
1. आप get to be taller
2. आप can use them in self defense
3. आप can... what आप don't think that's a good idea... oh well back to the drawing board...

1 घंटा Later

Ok what about this... What happened when I invested in Eyepatches... hmmm titles to long how about My Eyepatch Investment.... sounds good......
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posted by angy7sdg
38
Only in America ......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of

the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.




Only in America ......do people order

double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.





Only in America ......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.





Only in America ......do we leave cars

worth thousands of dollars in the

driveway and put our useless कचरा, जंक, रद्दी in the garage.




Only in America ......do we buy hot कुत्ता in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.




Only in America ......do we use the...
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Weird US - Winchester Mystery House
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added by Rodz
Source: desktopnexus
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