I found these stories online. These are true stories.
I used to know Josephat and his lovely family of a wife, 2 daughters and a son. He used to live in a town 1,000Km from the city. The town is on the Tanzania Zambia border. He used to come to the city many times during the साल on his pickup वैन, वान but when I did not see him for over a साल I inquired from his cousin. The cousin informed me that he had a motor accident on the Dar es Salaam Zambia Highway. He died on the spot. That was 6 years ago. I had forgotten about him and family till yesterday when I met his cousin...
Check out this infected canker sore in my mouth! I work for the IRS. Have आप ever tried cat meat? I don't know why I ate it - liver and onions always gives me gas. I just had a proctological exam - wow, worth every penny! The last time my head rang like this I woke up with a dead man अगला to me! I puked on the last person who flew अगला to me. My butt reeeally itches! Would आप look at the size of the hair I just yanked out of my nose! My psychiatrist says that flying helps offset my desire to mutilate small, defenseless, woodland creatures. The last guy who ignored me is still on a respirator....
Okay so if आप live on the eastcoast u are probably getting used to the snow..........so even if u aren't, everybody has the problem of having nothing to do when it snows but sled. So these are a few of the things that i enjoy to do.........hehe!
1. Fill balloons with water. Then leave them outside overnight.............yeah i'm this stupid. The अगला day, cut the balloons off and आप got.........AN ICE BALL!! (i usually make like 15) Then use them to pay dodgeball. This is especially fun to do in deep snow, when आप can barely हटाइए as it is. Technically, u could use them to do various things,...
1. find cereal boxes with prizes in them and open the box and stuff the toys in your pockets and hand bag या what ever आप can stuff.if caught simply say "these have been recalled as kids are prone to sneezing" 2. Follow the stock person in the vegtables and फल aisles and ask every मिनट "watcha doing?" 3. Ask the stock person as he put one item in "is that ripe? या rotten?" 4.if they have a toy aisle open toys (no matter what age आप are) and play with them (if squirt gun go to bathroom and fill it up with water and squirt people) 5.go inside the bathroom and sing everytime someone comes in....
Jeez, so many lists about girls telling guys what they should do when imposing them and such... It's time to extinguish those high standards, with some cold, hard, facts about us. Fighting आग with fire. *puts on sunglasses* Oh yeah.
So girls, here's a सूची about boys, द्वारा a boy.
Guys look, but don't flirt! 1. We look at other girls often, as ashamed as some of us might be about it. We're just naturally distracted. It, however, doesn't mean we're flirting with them straight away. Here's a सवाल I'd like to ask all girls in a relationship. What are आप expecting your boyfriend to do, cheat on...
1. Set all the alarm clocks to go off in 10-minute intervals
2. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, “Code 3 in housewares,…”and see what happens.
3. Go to the Service डेस्क and ask to put a bag of M&M’s on lay away.
4. Find one of the workers who is making a pyramid या a display of something and as soon as they are finished with it, ask for the thing that’s on the bottom and have a panic attack until they give it to you.
5. Get on the loud speaker and declare a “Going Out of Business Sale, All Items 99% Off”
Here's the famous 'Best Divorce Letter' द्वारा Dan to Connie, pretty hilarious, definitely a must read! xD
I know the counselor कहा we shouldn't contact each other during our "cooling off" period, but I couldn't wait anymore.
The दिन आप left, I swore I'd never talk to आप again but that was just the wounded little boy in me talking. Still, I never wanted to be the first on to make contact. In my fantasies, it was always आप who would come crawling back to me. I guess my pride needed that. But now I see that my pride’s cost me a lot of things. I'm tired of pretending I don't miss you....
1. At the airport, wear a uniform and claim आप are the pilot, get annoyed if they don't believe आप but DONT give up, see how far आप can get ( WARNING, may result in आप being arrested)
2. Whilst boarding the plane, say in a loud voice "THAT WING SURE DOES LOOK RUSTY!!"
3. When everyone is seated, do your own demonstration of what to do in an emergency, let this include 'comical' situations such as "in the (likely) event of the plane setting alight and becoming a plummeting fireball of death, please remember to tighten your seatbelt" look surprised when आप are the only one laughing.