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posted by cloudstrifefan
1.Einstein was four years old before he could speak.
2.Issac Newton did poorly in grade school.
3.Beethoven's संगीत teacher once कहा of him,"As a composer,he is hopeless."
4.When Thomas Edison was a boy his teacher told him he was too stupid to learn anything.
5.Michael Jordan was cut from his high school बास्केटबाल, बास्केटबॉल, बास्केट बॉल team.Boston Celtics Hall of Famers Bob Cousy and Bill Russel suffered the same fate.
5.A newspaper editor fired Walt डिज़्नी because he had no good ideas.
6.Winston Churchill failed the sixth grade.
7.Steven Spielberg dropped out of high school in his sophomore year. He was persuaded to come back and placed in a learning disabled class. He lasted a महीना and dropped out forever.
Things Guys Should Know About Girls

1. Don’t ever lie to us; we always find out.
2. We don’t enjoy talking dirty to आप as much as you
enjoy listening.
3. Don’t say आप understand when आप don’t.
4. Girls are pretty, but yours is the Prettiest!
5. आप don’t have PMS; don’t act like आप know what it’s
like.
6. Saying something sweet might get आप off the hook;
doing something sweet will always get आप off the hook.
7. If आप talk about having a big dick; we know आप don’t.
8. Size does matter, but only to hoes; not girls that
want relationships.
9. We don’t like it when आप act like Mr....
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posted by jessicamc26
The Engineer

An engineer dies and reports to hell.

Pretty soon, the engineer gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements.

After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty लोकप्रिय guy.

One दिन God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?"

Satan replies, "Hey things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

God replies, "What??? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake -- he should never have gotten down there; send him up here."

Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."

God says, "Send him back up here या I'll sue."

Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are आप going to get a lawyer?"
posted by Jeffersonian
A teacher forwarded this सूची of टिप्पणियाँ from test papers, essays, etc., पेश to science and health teachers द्वारा elementary, junior high, high school, and college students. As she noted, It is truly astonishing what weird science our young scholars can create under the pressures of time and grades.

The body consists of three parts - the branium, the borax, and the abominable cavity. The branium contains the brain, the borax contains the दिल and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u.
Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it...
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1 when they ask u what your name is, make a name up (like hello kitty या santino marella. या even better, if youre a girl make up a guys vice versa for da guys)

2 when they ask u what insturment u play, make up a name for your insturment

3 when u have to introduce that person, mess up, like say a stupid name and a wierd insturment they play. then explain that's what आप heard when they explained it 2 you

4 wear a कमीज, शर्ट over your uniform that makes the other teams band members offended.

5 hug them, and place a beetle INSIDE their uniform

6 bring along your little Brother/sister (if u dont hav one...
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posted by cheeeese
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