ABRIDGED FRIEZA:
#1:
Goku: (puts his hands up, preparing a spirit bomb)
Frieza: (not aware of what’s happening) What are आप doing now?
Goku: … Stretching.
Frieza: In the middle of our fight?
Goku: …… Yes.
(from distance)
Piccolo: What’s going on? He’s just standing there with his hands up.
Krillin: Wait a second.
Krillin: (Goku and Frieza and hear Krillin, cause he’s screaming as loud as possible) HE’S USING THE SPIRIT BOMB!
Frieza: The Spirit whats-it-now?
Goku: (thinking) Oh no.
Piccolo: Would आप stop screaming.
Krillin: (still screaming) THE SPIRIT BOMB IS THE ONLY THING THAT CAN KILL FRIEZA!
Piccolo: (Mad at Krillin’s stupidity) Shut up!
Krillin: Too scared!
Piccolo: Dammit!
Frieza: (about Krillin) What’s that fool going about now?
Goku: He’s talking about… Ghosts.
Frieda: What do ghosts have to do with this!?
Goku: Everything.
Freeza: … That's stupid.. You're stupid!.. STOP BEING STUPID!
#2:
Frieza: Why aren’t my men दिखा रहा है up!?… Oh, they're dead... WHY ARE THEY DEAD?!?!
#3:
Frieza: So... we've been flying for about 20 मिनटों now... got any family? ...Because if so, I probably killed them.. (Nail remains silent) Oh, I know! How about a good old fashioned joke? How many Namekian’s does it take to screw in a light bulb?.. Their whole race! One to screw in the light bulb, and the rest to die... And then the other one dies too. (Nail remains silent) Stop ignoring me!
#4:
Frieza: I have to admit; This is new, monkey. This is definitely new. But a monkey is still a monkey, and I've killed plenty in my day... Millions. Literally millions. (Goku remains silent) What's the matter? Run out of quips? Cat got your tongue? No और words to flail? (Goku maintains silence) आप think now that you're this so-called Super Saiyan that you're better than me, Lord Freeza? (Goku continues to maintain silence) WELL, YOU'RE NOT! I own you! I own your planet! I own this planet! In fact, FUCK THIS PLANET!!
#5:
Frieza: Oh please, if I'm as evil as आप say I am then let God strike me down where I stand. (gets hit द्वारा a lightning bolt but is unaffected) HA! Nice try jackass! अगला time give it your A-game!
#6:
Frieza: (last words) If I had any single regret for the countless horrific events that have transpired in my wake... it's that I'm dying.
#7:
Krillin: We’re from earth.
Frieza: Oh, good. I'll stop द्वारा your planet on the way home; pick up some earth eggs, some earth milk, an- BLOW IT THE FUCK UP!!
#8:
Frieza: Good Lord, I was led to believe your race survived entirely on water! How is he so fat?!
#9:
Frieza: (seeing how stupid गोकु is) How do आप function!?
#10:
Frieza: Oh, द्वारा the way.. Not dead.
ABRIDGED GOKU:
#1:
Raditz: So.. I finally found you.. Kakarrot
Goku: … What?
Raditz: That’s right, that’s your name.
Goku: … What?
Raditz: Yes, आप were sent too earth too kill every living creature.
Goku: … What?
Raditz: You.. Hit your head as baby.
Goku: … What?
#2:
Vegeta: (in pain) This... proves... nothing…
Goku: Are आप okay in there?
Vegeta: (sarcastically) Yeah, I'm fan-fucking-tastic. Nothing but gumdrops and ice cream in here.
Goku: (delighted) Oh, really? Can I come in too?
Vegeta: (after a short pause) ...I'm surrounded द्वारा idiots.
Goku: I thought आप were surrounded द्वारा gumdrops and ice cream.
Vegeta: (Vegeta screams with rage as he destroys the plateau around him) I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!! I WILL NOT BE HUMILATED द्वारा A LOW CLASS RENCH!!
Goku: Aww, looks like someone, has a ice cream head ache.
Vegeta: THAT’S IT!! EVERYONE DIES!.. SAY GOOD BYE TOO YOUR PLANET KAKARROT!!
Goku: That’s not very nice.
Vegeta: (screaming) OF COARSE NOT!! I’M FUCKING EVIL!!
#3:
Frieza: It’s like आप just use बिना सोचे समझे words आप hear, too sound smarter!
Goku: Ohh, your just being homophone.
#4:
Goku: My ribs, आप broke m… Mmmm, ribs.
#5:
Goku: I am the hope of the omniverse! I am the light bulb in the darkness! I am the सूअर का मांस, बेकन in the fridge for all the living things that cry out in hunger! I am the Alpha and the Amiga! I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am Son Gokū! and I am a Super-- (gets blasted in the face द्वारा Frieza) Saiyan.
#6:
Goku: I’m Goku.. I’m insane.. From earth.
Frieza: (confused stare).
Vegeta: (weakily) He means, Saiyan.
#7:
Goku: He’s talking about… Ghosts.
Frieda: What do ghosts have to do with this!?
Goku: Everything.
Freeza: … That's stupid.. You're stupid!.. STOP BEING STUPID!
#8:
Goku: Hey, Piccolo, mind if I ask आप somethin'?
Piccolo: What is it?
Goku: You're not human either, right?
Piccolo: Yeah...?
Goku: And your dad spit आप out as an egg, right?
Piccolo: What about it?
Goku: Are... Are आप a Yoshi?
Piccolo: (sarcastically) Yes, Goku. I'm a green fucking dinosaur.
Goku: Can... Can I ride you?
#9:
Krillin: But how could you--
Goku: टिकिया, मफिन Button.
Krillin: What?
Goku: Huh?
#10:
Goku: I'm done.. I'm done fighting you.. Your boring me.
ABRIDGED VEGETA:
#1:
Goku: What's wrong, Vegeta? Did Freezer do this to you?
Frieza: Oh look, he's all concerned. I'm impressed, Vegeta-- आप managed to make a friend.
Vegeta: (weakily) Hate you. Hate आप both
#2:
Cell: How?! HOW?! HOW DID आप GET THIS STRONG?!
Vegeta: I trained all दिन yesterday.
Cell: Oh, आप think you're being cute?!
Vegeta: Bitch, I'm adorable.
#3:
Vegeta: Is that me? Is that me stronger than me!? I’LL FUCKING KILL ME!!
#4:
Gohan: But how!? I thought आप had to have a pure दिल to become a Super Saiyan, like my dad.
Vegeta: Oh, trust me. There's और than one way to realize the legend…
(flashback to a badly-injured Vegeta throwing a hissy fit)
Vegeta: I wanna! I wanna be a Super Saiyan! I wanna! (begins pounding the ground like a spoiled child) IwannaIwannaIwannaIwannaIwanna—
(back to present)
Vegeta: Push-ups, sit ups and plenty of juice.
#5:
Bulma: आप कहा आप were wearing protection!
Vegeta: I was! I had my armour!
#6:
Vegeta: (laughs maniacally) He's gone! He's finally gone! I'm so happy right now, I might not even slaughter आप all!
Krillin: R-Really?
Vegeta: (laughter dies down) Oh no, आप are all thoroughly screwed.
#7:
Vegeta: It’s dark out.. In a planet with four suns.. (watch alarm goes off in his head) OH आप MOTHER FUCCCCCCCKKER!!
#8:
Vegeta: HAH! your dad's dead!
Piccolo: So's yours!
Vegeta: HAH!
#9:
Bulma: Oh, no, the Prince is getting all huffy! What are आप gonna do, try to blow up Earth again? Because I have गोकु on speed dial.
Vegeta: आप must be as stupid as he is if आप think he knows how to work a phone.
#10:
Vegeta: You! Namekian! Too strong! Explain now!
Trunks: He fused with Kami to become stronger.
Vegeta: The fuck's a Kami?
Krillin: Basically, God.
Vegeta: BUT I'M STILL HERE!
Trunks: Do आप really believe your own hype that much?
Vegeta: I AM THE HYPE!
#1:
Goku: (puts his hands up, preparing a spirit bomb)
Frieza: (not aware of what’s happening) What are आप doing now?
Goku: … Stretching.
Frieza: In the middle of our fight?
Goku: …… Yes.
(from distance)
Piccolo: What’s going on? He’s just standing there with his hands up.
Krillin: Wait a second.
Krillin: (Goku and Frieza and hear Krillin, cause he’s screaming as loud as possible) HE’S USING THE SPIRIT BOMB!
Frieza: The Spirit whats-it-now?
Goku: (thinking) Oh no.
Piccolo: Would आप stop screaming.
Krillin: (still screaming) THE SPIRIT BOMB IS THE ONLY THING THAT CAN KILL FRIEZA!
Piccolo: (Mad at Krillin’s stupidity) Shut up!
Krillin: Too scared!
Piccolo: Dammit!
Frieza: (about Krillin) What’s that fool going about now?
Goku: He’s talking about… Ghosts.
Frieda: What do ghosts have to do with this!?
Goku: Everything.
Freeza: … That's stupid.. You're stupid!.. STOP BEING STUPID!
#2:
Frieza: Why aren’t my men दिखा रहा है up!?… Oh, they're dead... WHY ARE THEY DEAD?!?!
#3:
Frieza: So... we've been flying for about 20 मिनटों now... got any family? ...Because if so, I probably killed them.. (Nail remains silent) Oh, I know! How about a good old fashioned joke? How many Namekian’s does it take to screw in a light bulb?.. Their whole race! One to screw in the light bulb, and the rest to die... And then the other one dies too. (Nail remains silent) Stop ignoring me!
#4:
Frieza: I have to admit; This is new, monkey. This is definitely new. But a monkey is still a monkey, and I've killed plenty in my day... Millions. Literally millions. (Goku remains silent) What's the matter? Run out of quips? Cat got your tongue? No और words to flail? (Goku maintains silence) आप think now that you're this so-called Super Saiyan that you're better than me, Lord Freeza? (Goku continues to maintain silence) WELL, YOU'RE NOT! I own you! I own your planet! I own this planet! In fact, FUCK THIS PLANET!!
#5:
Frieza: Oh please, if I'm as evil as आप say I am then let God strike me down where I stand. (gets hit द्वारा a lightning bolt but is unaffected) HA! Nice try jackass! अगला time give it your A-game!
#6:
Frieza: (last words) If I had any single regret for the countless horrific events that have transpired in my wake... it's that I'm dying.
#7:
Krillin: We’re from earth.
Frieza: Oh, good. I'll stop द्वारा your planet on the way home; pick up some earth eggs, some earth milk, an- BLOW IT THE FUCK UP!!
#8:
Frieza: Good Lord, I was led to believe your race survived entirely on water! How is he so fat?!
#9:
Frieza: (seeing how stupid गोकु is) How do आप function!?
#10:
Frieza: Oh, द्वारा the way.. Not dead.
ABRIDGED GOKU:
#1:
Raditz: So.. I finally found you.. Kakarrot
Goku: … What?
Raditz: That’s right, that’s your name.
Goku: … What?
Raditz: Yes, आप were sent too earth too kill every living creature.
Goku: … What?
Raditz: You.. Hit your head as baby.
Goku: … What?
#2:
Vegeta: (in pain) This... proves... nothing…
Goku: Are आप okay in there?
Vegeta: (sarcastically) Yeah, I'm fan-fucking-tastic. Nothing but gumdrops and ice cream in here.
Goku: (delighted) Oh, really? Can I come in too?
Vegeta: (after a short pause) ...I'm surrounded द्वारा idiots.
Goku: I thought आप were surrounded द्वारा gumdrops and ice cream.
Vegeta: (Vegeta screams with rage as he destroys the plateau around him) I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!! I WILL NOT BE HUMILATED द्वारा A LOW CLASS RENCH!!
Goku: Aww, looks like someone, has a ice cream head ache.
Vegeta: THAT’S IT!! EVERYONE DIES!.. SAY GOOD BYE TOO YOUR PLANET KAKARROT!!
Goku: That’s not very nice.
Vegeta: (screaming) OF COARSE NOT!! I’M FUCKING EVIL!!
#3:
Frieza: It’s like आप just use बिना सोचे समझे words आप hear, too sound smarter!
Goku: Ohh, your just being homophone.
#4:
Goku: My ribs, आप broke m… Mmmm, ribs.
#5:
Goku: I am the hope of the omniverse! I am the light bulb in the darkness! I am the सूअर का मांस, बेकन in the fridge for all the living things that cry out in hunger! I am the Alpha and the Amiga! I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am Son Gokū! and I am a Super-- (gets blasted in the face द्वारा Frieza) Saiyan.
#6:
Goku: I’m Goku.. I’m insane.. From earth.
Frieza: (confused stare).
Vegeta: (weakily) He means, Saiyan.
#7:
Goku: He’s talking about… Ghosts.
Frieda: What do ghosts have to do with this!?
Goku: Everything.
Freeza: … That's stupid.. You're stupid!.. STOP BEING STUPID!
#8:
Goku: Hey, Piccolo, mind if I ask आप somethin'?
Piccolo: What is it?
Goku: You're not human either, right?
Piccolo: Yeah...?
Goku: And your dad spit आप out as an egg, right?
Piccolo: What about it?
Goku: Are... Are आप a Yoshi?
Piccolo: (sarcastically) Yes, Goku. I'm a green fucking dinosaur.
Goku: Can... Can I ride you?
#9:
Krillin: But how could you--
Goku: टिकिया, मफिन Button.
Krillin: What?
Goku: Huh?
#10:
Goku: I'm done.. I'm done fighting you.. Your boring me.
ABRIDGED VEGETA:
#1:
Goku: What's wrong, Vegeta? Did Freezer do this to you?
Frieza: Oh look, he's all concerned. I'm impressed, Vegeta-- आप managed to make a friend.
Vegeta: (weakily) Hate you. Hate आप both
#2:
Cell: How?! HOW?! HOW DID आप GET THIS STRONG?!
Vegeta: I trained all दिन yesterday.
Cell: Oh, आप think you're being cute?!
Vegeta: Bitch, I'm adorable.
#3:
Vegeta: Is that me? Is that me stronger than me!? I’LL FUCKING KILL ME!!
#4:
Gohan: But how!? I thought आप had to have a pure दिल to become a Super Saiyan, like my dad.
Vegeta: Oh, trust me. There's और than one way to realize the legend…
(flashback to a badly-injured Vegeta throwing a hissy fit)
Vegeta: I wanna! I wanna be a Super Saiyan! I wanna! (begins pounding the ground like a spoiled child) IwannaIwannaIwannaIwannaIwanna—
(back to present)
Vegeta: Push-ups, sit ups and plenty of juice.
#5:
Bulma: आप कहा आप were wearing protection!
Vegeta: I was! I had my armour!
#6:
Vegeta: (laughs maniacally) He's gone! He's finally gone! I'm so happy right now, I might not even slaughter आप all!
Krillin: R-Really?
Vegeta: (laughter dies down) Oh no, आप are all thoroughly screwed.
#7:
Vegeta: It’s dark out.. In a planet with four suns.. (watch alarm goes off in his head) OH आप MOTHER FUCCCCCCCKKER!!
#8:
Vegeta: HAH! your dad's dead!
Piccolo: So's yours!
Vegeta: HAH!
#9:
Bulma: Oh, no, the Prince is getting all huffy! What are आप gonna do, try to blow up Earth again? Because I have गोकु on speed dial.
Vegeta: आप must be as stupid as he is if आप think he knows how to work a phone.
#10:
Vegeta: You! Namekian! Too strong! Explain now!
Trunks: He fused with Kami to become stronger.
Vegeta: The fuck's a Kami?
Krillin: Basically, God.
Vegeta: BUT I'M STILL HERE!
Trunks: Do आप really believe your own hype that much?
Vegeta: I AM THE HYPE!
Arthur is 90 years old. He's played golf every दिन since his retirement 25 years ago. One दिन he arrives घर looking downcast. "That's it," he tells his wife. "I'm giving up golf. My eyesight has become so bad that once I hit the ball I couldn't see where it went."
His wife sympathises and makes him a cup of tea. As they sit down she says, "Why don't आप take my brother with आप and give it one और try."
"That's no good" sighs Arthur, "your brother's a hundred and three. He can't help."
"He may be a hundred and three", says the wife, "but his eyesight is perfect."
So the अगला दिन Arthur heads off to the golf course with his brother-in-law. He tees up, takes a mighty झूला, स्विंग and squints down the fairway.
He turns to the brother-in-law and says, "Did आप see the ball?"
"Of course I did!" replied the brother-in-law. "I have perfect eyesight".
"Where did it go?" says Arthur.
"I don't remember."
His wife sympathises and makes him a cup of tea. As they sit down she says, "Why don't आप take my brother with आप and give it one और try."
"That's no good" sighs Arthur, "your brother's a hundred and three. He can't help."
"He may be a hundred and three", says the wife, "but his eyesight is perfect."
So the अगला दिन Arthur heads off to the golf course with his brother-in-law. He tees up, takes a mighty झूला, स्विंग and squints down the fairway.
He turns to the brother-in-law and says, "Did आप see the ball?"
"Of course I did!" replied the brother-in-law. "I have perfect eyesight".
"Where did it go?" says Arthur.
"I don't remember."
