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The kingdom of God is inside you, and all around you, not in a mansion of wood and stone. विभाजित करें, विभक्त करें a piece of wood and God is there. Lift a stone and आप will find God.

‘Angel या beast along with powerful forces. The Wild Ones appear,’ a young girl named Eve Black wrote in her notebook. She continued for awhile, finishing with ‘an army large enough to destroy the mass of the matriarch.
Her journal was full of a story she had been लेखन about The Wild Ones and The Legion of the Black. She hurried to school. She waved to a few फ्रेंड्स and went to her first class- history. She sat down and put in her earbuds.
You’ve been running for so long, still breathing
Hoping soon to find a song worth singing
Every chapter of this note, they’re reading
But you’re slowly losing hope on bleeding
The lyrics of Devil’s Choir blasted into her ears and she pulled out her notebook again. She began to write.
‘Victim to the dark seduction of the serpent matriarch, together The Wild Ones and this Legion of the Black march against the army of F.E.A.R. in an effort to free mankind from the bondage of F.E.A.R. and free the earth from immortal death.’
The teacher slammed her hand onto Eve’s paper and yanked out her earbuds.
“If this happens one और time you’re going to the principles,” The teacher warned Eve.
As she walked off Eve carefully put her earbuds back in. सेकंड्स later the teacher called her name.
“Eve Black!” She shouted, “Principles office, now.”
When Eve didn’t respond she stormed over to her desk.
“Go! Out of class!”
Eve stood and the teacher hustled her out, urging her to go. She walked her out the door and shooed her out. Eve walked down the hall, earbuds in, still listening to her favourite band; Black Veil Brides. She arrived at the office and the principle called her parents. Eve continued to write.
‘Victim to the dark seduction of the serpent matriarch, together The Wild Ones and this Legion of the Black march against the army of F.E.A.R. in an effort to free mankind from the bondage of F.E.A.R. and free the earth from immortal death.’
She closed her eyes thinking of what happened in Legion of the Black.
 Eve's drawing
Eve's drawing
I got this off an e-mail from a friend, so this is not mine and I take no claim in it. Please don't do these things in real life, it's just for fun and a good laugh. And if आप do do these things (number 4 fo example), than I'm sorry but you're really dumb.

Enjoy!

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6 Ways On How To Deal With शार्क Attacks:

1) DON'T SWIM IN THE SEA
More than 99% of शार्क attacks happen in large watermasses- also know as oceans. An easy way to tell if आप are in an ocean is to taste the water- it will taste like salt.

2) SWIM ALONGSIDE FAT PEOPLE
Make sure that there...
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posted by mehere
Im sorry if आप dont like me Im sorry if आप think I suck but most of all Im sorry, I dont give a fuck

Worry about your character and not your reputation, because your character is who आप are, and your reputation is only what people think of you.

I think Ive finally come to the point in my life where Im happy with myself and know that I dont have to change या be a certain way for people to like me anymore. Im just fine and if someone doesnt think I am, screw them.

If आप don't like my words, don't listen. If आप don't like my appearance, don't look. If आप don't like my actions, turn your head; It's as simple as that.

Although Ive been hurt I still remain strong. आप think I have regrets? Well, youre wrong.
Note; This song is based off of My Little Pony; Friendship is Magic's very own Pinkie Pie's song, 'Giggle at the Ghostie'.

Come on, Fanpop, don't आप see!
When I was a little silly and the trolls would bring me down!
Their malice and their hatred was starting to make me frown!
I'd cry in my own bedroom, from what I thought I read! But this shouldn't be the reason that I should end up dead!
They say, "Phoenix, आप gotta stand up tall, and deal with these dumb fags! They're just idiots who try to be a dirtbag!"
'Teehee' at the Troll!
Do a barrel roll!
Slap the swearing jerks!
Always have your perks!
Ignore the idiot!
रिपोर्ट the hypocrite!
And tell that stupid jerk to leave आप alone
And GTFO off the computer because if they don't they got another thing coming for them and TROLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLLLL!
Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan them!

Now don't let those trolls get to you. Kick their asses and get them off of फैन्पॉप and ze internetz. :3
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat या drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why आप have no food.

FRIENDS: Would bail आप out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting अगला to आप sayin "DAMN!"were screwed"!

FRIENDS: Have never seen आप cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else आप cried...just laugh about it with आप in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks आप to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has आप on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS:...
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1. Every दिन at school is the same
2. आप never know if your braids look digusting या not
3. आप are so used to never talking that if somebody says something to you, never know how to react
4. आप would like to think that people notice या even think about आप but आप are really just the big ugly quiet black girl nobody knows या cares about
5. आप worry people will write nasty टिप्पणियाँ on your फैन्पॉप लेख that is obvioustly meant to vent your feeling out
6. On the weekend all आप do is watch tv and sleep and play with your cat
7. When आप only really have like 3 फ्रेंड्स at school and 2 of them...
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This is a true story of Mother’s Sacrifice during the China Earthquake.
After the Earthquake had subsided, when the rescuers reached the ruins of a young woman’s house, they saw her dead body through the cracks. But her pose was somehow strange that she knelt on her knees like a person was worshiping; her body was leaning forward, and her two hands were supporting द्वारा an object. The collapsed house had crashed her back and her head.

With so many difficulties, the leader of the rescuer team put his hand through a narrow gap on the दीवार to reach the woman’s body. He was hoping that this woman...
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1) Lean over them when there asleep and sing a lullaby really loud and out of tune.

2) Every five मिनटों yell "The aliens are coming!"

3) Choose a specifice piece of cutlery (eg. a fork) and stare accusingly at that item every time आप see it.

4) Buy face paints and paint their face when there asleep. Try doing something the person is afriad of. (eg. clown, zombie)

5) Announce that आप are actually a secret agent, spying on somone who lives in your house.

6) Call your house number and announce that आप are going on strike. If they ask for a reason, hang up. Caution: Make sure आप dont get a wrong number!!

7) Put ice cubes in everyone's warm drink.

8) Every time they speak interrupt them with "Curiosity killed the cat."

9) Set alarms on your mobile/cell phone that go off every 10 minutes.
posted by MJlover101
-New York City has 11 letters.

-Afghanistan has 11 letters.

-Ramsin Yuseb (the terrorist who threatened to destroy the Twin Towers in 1993) has 11 letters.

-George W झाड़ी, बुश has 11 letters.

-The Twin Towers make an "11",

-New York is the 11th state.

-The first plane that crashed into the Twin Towers was flight number 11.

-Flight 11 was carrying 92 passengers. (9+2=11)

-Flight 77 which also hit the Twin Towers was carrying 65 passengers. (6+5=11)

-The tradegy was September 11, या 9/11. (9+1+1=11)

-The total number of victims inside the planes was 254. (2+4+5=11)

-September 11 is the 254th दिन of the year....
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Note:I wrote that only for fun! i don't even believe if the world is going to end in 2012 cause God only knows when! so don't put stupid टिप्पणियाँ please!


-How to Survive:

1-Make sure that you've got a back pack full of खाना and drink

2-Build a room under the ground make sure,that it's ready to use.

3-Sell your Home

4-If your mum या dad is a Doctor ask him/her to teach आप some stuff about nursing

5-go to the room आप built under the ground and put some खाना and drinks there!

6-When the दिन comes! go to the room आप built under the ground at 4:00 am before the sun comes!


How to get Ready:(2 Days before...
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do this stuff if u dare but it would be funny 2 c
something like this happen i also made this up myself

1. start caramelldansen in the middle of the store

2. go up 2 a बिना सोचे समझे person and hand them a paper
that says death on it when u hand it 2 them say
wakarimasen (i don't understand) in a really weird
voice then run away

3. sing a really annoying song at the चोटी, शीर्ष of your lungs repeatedly

4. follow बिना सोचे समझे people all over the store या where ever they go except the bathroom (that would just be
creepy)

5. say there u r i was looking all over 4 u and glomp (hug some 1 really tight) a बिना सोचे समझे person

6. go up...
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posted by Ninjacupcake
Hate is everywhere. It can be because of race, gender या if someone is gay/lesbian/bi. Sadly, a lot of us have to live with it. What I want to speak about are the hatings of people with different sexual orientations.

Most of आप have heard Born This Way द्वारा Lady Gaga. I want to say that everyone IS beautiful in their way cause God makes no mistakes. Even though I'm straight, that does NOT mean that I hate others. I प्यार everyone. It makes me mad, but also sad, because that's a human being आप are hating. They have red blood when they bleed, need खाना when they are hungry, and DANG, their poop...
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posted by iluvsmj
"I'm hungry." = I'm hungry.

"I'm sleepy." = I'm sleepy.

"I'm tired." = I'm tired.

"Do आप want to go to a movie?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.

"Can I take आप out to dinner?" = Same as Above

"Can I call आप sometime?" = Same as Above

"Nice dress!" = Nice cleavage!

"You look tense, let me give आप a massage." = I want to feel your bare skin

"What's wrong?" = I don't see why आप are making such a big deal out of this.

"What's wrong?" = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma are आप going through now?

"I प्यार you, too." = Okay, I कहा it...we'd better have sex now!

"Yes, I...
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this is something that was in the news box on yahoo.



New term: mom-zilla. We know all about temporary bridal insanity, and the underreported groom version, but in some families, it’s the parents who are seized द्वारा irrational wedding meltdowns.

Last month, 60-year-old British florist and total mom-zilla, Carolyn Bourne attacked. After her stepson’s bride-to-be, Heidi Withers, was a guest in her house she had a thing या two to teach her before she entered the Bourne family.

So Bourne sent the 29-year-old a soul-crushing email. The subject line: “Your lack of manners.” The bullet points...
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1.You abuse our प्यार आप lose it.
2.When we find the right guy we प्यार him and NEVER want to lose him.
3.Our प्यार is a privlige NOT a right.
4.Our hearts are delicate items, so when we do give them to the guy we प्यार be careful with it.
5.Drinking will NOT impress us in any way shape या form.
6.Guys आप should respect our feelings.
7.In our relationship with आप (the guy) We have dominance to.
8.We're as good at listening as we are at talking.
9.When it comes to the guy we truly प्यार we will devote A LOT of our time to only you.
10.When आप (the guy we love) break our hearts, you've pretty much killed us until we heal.
Just पढ़ना some of the टर्मिनेटर कोट्स through again... and actually found a hint on what happened between Arnold and the maid. Enjoy my version!


Maid: Nice night for a walk, eh?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Nice night for a walk.
Maid #2: Wash दिन tomorrow? Nothing clean, right?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Nothing clean. Right.
Maid: Hey, I think this guy's a couple cans short of a six-pack.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Your clothes... give them to me, now.
Maid: Fuck you, asshole!
Arnold nods.


I know there are a lot of people making fun of Arnold Schwarzenegger since he admitted to his wife that he's not only a cheater but a liar as well. आप might get annoyed द्वारा it and think "Oh poor Arnie". But honestly? This guy just ASKED for it. It takes a big jerk to have a child with another woman, an even bigger one to keep it a secret for 14 years and the biggest one to only reveal it to his wife after he quit his job so there'd be no damage to his position.
posted by iamagagamonster
~ In my opinion! alright! आप can think what ever आप can think about the heros on here ~

5. Batman: The majority of people प्यार batman, I go for Superman. बैटमैन dosn't even have super powers he only has gadjets [spelling?] and gizmos. One दिन he's gona be in deep danger and then he won't be able to reach his "special" button. Without the help of his sidekick, which brings me to my अगला hero

4. Robin: Robin is a superhero named after a migratory songbird that आप can find in your backyard and feed bird seed to. Can someone tell me why they would name Batman’s sidekick after a songbird? What...
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How to Tell if a Guy likes You
How to Know that a Guy Likes You

Here are the 500 ways to tell if a guy likes You....

01. He smiles at आप a lot.

02. He likes talking to you.

03. He compliments आप a lot.

04. He always agrees with you.

05. He asks if आप are single.

06. He asks आप out for lunch.

07. He asks आप out on a date.

08. He knows your zodiac sign.

09. He never burps around you.

10. He really cares about you.

11. He treats आप like a lady.

12. He walks आप to your door.

13. He wants to see आप often.

14. He always wants to hug you.

15. He tells आप he likes you.

16. His फ्रेंड्स know...
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posted by sierradawn9
Ok, so I'm a redhead. I have freckles and light skin. So I'm considered ginger. Until a few weeks ago, I didn't even know what that term meant.
 I learned what it meant when I was on the bus and this guy took something from me. He कहा he wouldn't give it back until I admitted I was a ginger. So I कहा "I'm a ginger...?", and he yelled "You have no soooouuul!"
 That got me mad, sad, and confused.
 Seriously guys. Really? Just because some (and I do mean some) redheads have attitudes and act bitchy, that does NOT give आप the right to make a stereotype out of the rest of us redheads.
 I'm not...
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10. When being pulled over द्वारा a cop and he या she says, "Sir(/)Ma'am, आप have been caught speeding, how much do आप think आप were going?" Don't say, "Well आप must've gone AT LEAST 90 to catch up with me."

9. When your teacher asks where your homework is when आप haven't handed it in don't say, "My dog ate my homework." That's the oldest excuse in the book. Plus, nobody ever buys it unless they are a complete moron या born yesterday.

8. When your older sister is having her period या PMS-ing don't say, "Hey sis, have आप been putting on a little weight?" It's a कुतिया, मतलबी slap waiting to happen.

7....
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posted by greenstergirl
1. I asked God for a bike. But I know God doesn't work that way. So I चुरा लिया a bike and asked for forgiveness.

2. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag आप down and beat आप with experience.

3. Going to church doesn't make आप Christian even और then standing in a गेराज makes आप a car.

4. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. Its still on the सूची though.

5. war does not determine who is right- only who is left.

6. Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, please notify....." I put DOCTOR.

7.Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at घर even if...
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