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Name something a blind person might use - A sword

Name a song with moon in the शीर्षक - Blue suede moon

Name a bird with a long neck - Naomi Campbell

Name an occupation where आप need a torch - A burglar

Name a dangerous race - The Arabs

Name an item of clothing worn द्वारा the 3 musketeers - A horse

Name something that floats in the bath - Water

Name something आप wear on the समुद्र तट - A deckchair

Name something Red - My cardigan

Name a famous cowboy - Buck Rogers

A number आप have to memorize - 7

Something आप do before going to बिस्तर - Sleep

Something आप put on walls - Roofs

Something in the garden that's green - Shed

Something that flies that doesn't have an engine - A bicycle with wings

Something आप might be allergic to - Skiing

Name a famous bridge - The bridge over troubled waters

Something आप do in the bathroom - Decorate

Name an animal आप might see at the zoo - A dog

Something associated with the police - Pigs

A sign of the zodiac - April

Something slippery - A con-man

A खाना that can be brown या white - Potato

A जैकेट potato topping - Jam

A famous Scotsman - Jock

Another famous Scotsman - Vinnie Jones

Something with a hole in it - Window

A non living object with legs - Plant

A domestic animal - Leopard

A part of the body beginning with 'N' - Knee

A way of cooking मछली - Cod

Something आप open other than a door - Your bowels
केबिन for the Summer
By: moolah
Chapter Seven: Laken


    Hi! I’m Laken Reese Barenshsky. I’m 19 and I live with my parents and my 15 साल old brother, Jason. I have the most wonderful, beautiful girlfriend, Tori. She’s pretty, she has long brown hair, that’s naturally curly, brown eyes and her smile is gorgeous, like I’ve just been snapped with the sun! God, she’s sexy.
    “GOALLLLLLLL!” I scream whenever I kick the नाशपाती into the side of this कचरे के डिब्बे, कूड़ेदान in the back of the store. Zack grumbles (because he’s a loser!) and we keep kicking this...
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posted by smileypop9
These लेखाए are gonna be the thoughts on life and stuff, and this is part two.
I did this because I was bored, and because I wanna get my thoughts out.
---------

Rap in one word? Crap.
That's my opinion, so don't bash me.
.
Anyway, I hate that stupid drivel. Yeah ok, sorry kids, that I sound like your mother. But I really think that people who listen to rap could seriously use an update to their tunes.
Why would आप wanna listen to संगीत from people who wear their pants down to their knees, objectify women, and swear 24/7?
There's much better संगीत available.
...
People who listen to rap are kinda...
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The Dr. Z!!
By: moolah
(Note: I’ve changed both me and my friend’s name for privacy. I have also changed the name of the school, and my [math] teacher )
[P.S: For Ellen’s part, I am just guessing what happened when I was in the bathroom!]
True Story.

Scene: Applebee’s
Time: 7:50
Why: My birthday dinner
Who: Tabby(me) and Ellen(my friend)
Tabby’s P.O.V
    I had to go to the bathroom, so my friend Ellen and I went to the Applebee’s bathroom, and I knocked on the one door to a stall. “YES HONEY!” A woman *I think* who sounded strangely like a man laughed as she spoke...
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1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well-lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils.

2. Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain आप understand it.

3. Walk down to the vending machines and buy some coffee to help आप concentrate.

4. Stop off at another floor, on the way back and visit with your friend from class. If your friend hasn't started the paper yet either, आप can both walk to the nearby cafe and buy a hamburger to help आप concentrate. If your friend shows आप his paper, typed, double-spaced, and bound in one of those irritating see-through plastic folders,...
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posted by invadercalliope
Oh-o-o-oa
Oh-o-o-o

Oh-o-o-oa
Oh-o-o-o

Sweet little bumble bee I know what आप want from me
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Sweet little bumble bee और than just a fantasy
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da

My दिल skips a beat
When आप walk in the room
I go boom boom boom
You go zoom zoom zoom
You're my playboy, playtoy
Love and my friend
I wanna be with आप until the end

I give my दिल and my soul to you
To make आप see its true
Im so confused, baby, cant आप see
Please come rescue me

Sweet little bumble bee I know what आप want from me
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Sweet little bumble...
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The following is a very fake letter! Trust me!

To the people of the future,
    My name is Andrea Reese. I live in Burke Clouds. I live with my mom (Kayla), my dad (George), my cousin (Annie), my two sisters (Ally and Aria). I have a brother (Chance) who is 18 and in collage. He’s nice to me, unlike my friend, Alexis, brother. I प्यार my family. I go to Franco Bud Rose Middle School. I am happy. But, I have a serious cancer. It has no none cure, no chemo can cure it. I’ve had it for a साल and a half and have been alive. My time is limited here, and I wanted to put this...
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posted by invadercalliope
They say, don't trust,
You, me, we, us,
So we'll fall if we must,
Cause it's you, me,
And it's all about,
It's all about
It's all about us, all about us
It's all about, all about us
All about us
And that's the thing that they can't touch
'Cause आप know (ah-ah)
It's all about us, all about us
It's all about, all about us
All about us
We'll Run away if we must
'Cause आप know (ah-ah)
It's all about us (It's all about us)
It's all about us (It's all about us)
In आप I can trust (It's all about us)
It's all about us
If they hurt you,
They hurt me too,
So we'll rise up,
Won't stop,
And it's all...
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posted by invadercalliope
Songwriters: Rodgers, Nile; Edwards, Bernard

(CHORUS:)We are familyI got all my sisters with meWe are familyGet up ev'rybody and singEv'ryone can see we're togetherAs we walk on by(FLY!) and we fly just like birds of a featherI won't tell no lie(ALL!) all of the people around us they sayCan they be that closeJust let me state for the recordWe're giving प्यार in a family dose
(CHORUS x2)Living life is fun and we've just begunTo get our share of the world's delights(HIGH!) high hopes we have for the futureAnd our goal's in sight(WE!) no we don't get depressedHere's what we call our golden ruleHave faith in आप and the things आप doYou won't go wrongThis is our family Jewel(REPEAT CHORUS TO FADE)
The End
posted by invadercalliope
Ingredients:
•4 cups steamed Japanese rice
•strips of dried nori (seaweed)
•salt to taste
•black sesame seeds
•*for fillings:
•ume (pickled plum) / grilled salted सैल्मन, सामन (small chunks) / kombu no tsukudani
Preparation:
Cook steamed rice. Put about a half cup of steamed चावल in a चावल bowl. Wet your hands in water so that the चावल won't stick. Rub some salt on your hands. Place the steamed चावल on your hand and put your प्रिय filling, such as kombu-no-tsukudani, umeboshi, and grilled सैल्मन, सामन on the rice. Push the filling into the चावल lightly. Hold the चावल between your palms. Form the चावल into a round, a triangle, या a cylinder द्वारा pressing lightly with your both palms. Roll the चावल ball on your hands a few times, pressing lightly. लपेटें the चावल ball with a strip of nori या sprinkle some sesame seeds on them.
voice: NEW FROM WHAT EVA THIS IS IT IS....... THE WHAT EVER IT IS!!!!!!!! This is made in the USA (china) made totaly द्वारा americans (aliens) and it total IS NOT toxic!!!!!

Woman: I got my son the what ever it is for his berthday and he...

voice: LOVED IT!

Girl's friend: आप got the what ever it is?

Girl: ya. And I could not LIVE without my what ever it is.

Girl's friend: what does it do?

Girl: I don't know. But I प्यार it!

Voice: the what ever it is is only $20 plus $100 shiping and handleing! but if आप call right now we will also send आप a what ever आप call it for double the price even though it is the same thing! we will also double it! Just pay $10000000 और dollers shiping and handleing! आप GET IT ALL!!!!! the what ever it is , the what ever आप call it! CALL NOW!!!

other voice: To get the what ever it it and what ever आप call it have आप credit cards ready and get ready for bankruptsey! CALL NOW!!!
posted by invadercalliope
CALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOO
OOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLL!!
HI EVERYONE I'M YOUR HOST INVADER CALLIOPE!
ITS THE THIRD EPISODE!
HURRAY!
TODAYS A VERY SPECAIL दिन BECAUSE I AFISHALY!
WELL TODAY OUR GUEST तारा, स्टार IS......GIR!
BUM BUM B BUM!
Invader Calliope: HIIIIIII GIR!
Gir: HI!
Invader Calliope: Thats all आप have to say! HI!
AT LEAST ZIM STAYED IN CHARACTER WHEN HE WAS ON THE SHOW!
Gir: Sorry but it's hard to stay in character and
Invader Calliope: AND!?! गिर EVERYONE LOVES आप THE MOST आप HAVE THE MOST प्रशंसक GIRLS AND ZIM STAYED IN CHARACTER!
Oh no we are out of time good bye now and in joy the suprise picture!
The End!
Ok,Here are thingz that a am interested in!
Enjoy
Ok here are the biggest things i enjoy: Invader Zim,Video Games,Anime,softcore music,yaoi!
Here are some फिल्में i am interested in:Invader Dib,9,The nightmare before x-mas,corpse bride,the ring,paranormal activity,some ऐनीमे movies,titanic
Here is some संगीत i'm interestes in:Gir,Invader Zim sound track,anime music,theme songs in tv shows,marilyn manson,my chemical romance,tokyo hotel,bella morte,drowning pool,evanescence
Here are some पुस्तकें i'm interested in:Anything Jhonen Vasquez,Manga,Invader Zim comics,batman comic books,animal books
posted by EmzLovesCheryl
Well, I'm bored, and depressed, so I've decided to सूची all the things I hate. Well, all the things I hate that I can think of!


1. Fire.
2. Small spaces.
3. The sound आप get when आप scratch a balloon.
4. Balloons in general. But just the rubbery ones, आप know, not the foily ones? Well I know what I mean anyway. :/
5. Nose bleeds.
6. Clowns.
7. Bullies and bullying.
8. School.
9. Spoilt bitches who think that everything is about them, and don't even think about others' feelings.
10. Seeing a loved one cry.
11. The awkward moments that seem to stalk my life.
12. Witnessing a situation that is nothing to do with you, and knowing that it's not going to end happily.
13. Having to exercise in in the boiling hot sun.
14. Those days when आप just feel like total crap.
15. PE.
16. Sharp knives.
17. मछली fingers.
18. The majority of green vegetables.
19. Being alone outside in the dark.
20. Watching someone suffer.
posted by moodystuff449
Thing are going round and round my head, या maybe my head is going round and round in things. -(Diana Wynne Jones)Howl's Moving Castle

Sophie, I'm dying of boredom in here, या maybe just dying. -(Diana Wynne Jones)Howl's Moving Castle

"You must admit I have a right to live in a pigsty if I want." — Diana Wynne Jones (Howl's Moving Castle)

"’I think we ought to live happily ever after,’ and she thought he meant it. Sophie knew that living happily ever after with Howl would be a good deal और hair-raising than any storybook made it sound, though she was determined to try.

‘It should be hair-raising,’...
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posted by Blackteardrops
*** No offense to any one... Just randomness xD


If I Were a Boy PARODY

If I were a boy I would be gay
My guy liner would serve as a warning
I would तारीख, दिनांक Adam Lambert
And he’d call me babe

And we would make out on stage
I'd किस who I wanted
But I’d probably get confronted
No one would stick up for me

If I were a boy
I think I would be gay
I would never तारीख, दिनांक a girl
I swear I'd still प्यार men

I'd watch Glee
'Cause I know it’s really awesome
When आप watch a brand new one
I’d invite my फ्रेंड्स over
And I wouldn’t let much change but

If I were a boy
I would be gay
I’d come out of the closet
And I’d push...
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brick:butch i'm going to sleep and don't broke something
butch:wait now?
brick:yea so what?
butch:oh come on brick! we can have a party!
brick:party? butch i want a pease!
butch:ok आप go...
(brick goes to his room)
butch:you leave your phone here brick? (took bricks phone) now let's send SMSes
(door घंटी, बेल rings)
butch:(looks in the hole) it's open
(mitch comes)
mitch:hey butch
butch:wow mitch wats up?
mitch:i just wanted my ball back (tooks his ball)
butch:hey what is in your pocket?
mitch:marker
butch:will आप give it to me?
mitch:what you'll give?
butch:umm brick's hat?
mitch:i don't want...
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Chapter one
Okay this is a really बिना सोचे समझे stroy but I was bored and I couldn't get this idea out of my head. In my opinion it is really badly written so sorry.

“Okay Class, आप have the rest of the period to finish this quiz. This is the last grade before your midterm so work well, and remembers what we studied,” कहा my Mr. Grazing, my math teacher. He was the kind of teacher kids pick on and make fun of behind his back. I hate math, so I don’t care for him as a teacher much. He usually wears a sweater vest and weird 1950 glasses that squeeze his nose at the tip.

I stared at the Chapter...
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posted by Annacrombie
This is a true story that happened to me moments ago
____________________________________________________

I sat in my room, twenty past 11 trying to find और crap on the internet
I herd a loud noise downstairs, then a crash, a slam of door and some slurred words
My parents were outta town and my lil sis was at a sleep over, what the hell was going on?
I put my laptop down and grabbed the nearest item, which was a lamp,
My brother Luca, aged 21, walked into my room, i could smell the acahol in his breath
"Who da sexiest lil sod in the world? आप are!" He pointed at me before colapsing on the floor,...
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User: So your a robot?


Cleverbot: No आप are a robot times 1000000.


User: No आप are a robot times 1000000.


Cleverbot: I am a human and आप are a robot.


User: User: आप robot.User: आप robot.User: आप robot.


Cleverbot: Hahahaha that was funny. आप are the robot here.

User: User: आप robot.User: आप robot.User: आप robot.

Cleverbot: No i'm not robot... आप computer?

User: So your a robot?

Cleverbot: Yes I 'd like to know how I can have my own bot.

User: So आप admit that your a robot?

Cleverbot: Yes. I am a robot.




लोल yes fail I know
i don't know if this is already on here. i feel lazy and don't feel like looking.

i found this on some joke website:

CAROLS FOR THE MENTALLY DISTURBED

SCHIZOPHRENIA: do आप hear what i hear?

DEMENTIA: I think I'll be घर for Christmas

MANIC: deck the halls and walls and house and lawn and streets and stores and office and town and cars and busses and trucks and trees and आग hydrants and...

PARANOID: santa claus is coming to get me

PERSONALITY DISORDER: आप better watch out, I'm gonna cry, I'm gonna pout, maybe I'll tell आप why

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER: jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell...
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