आप mind telling me why the floor is covered in whipped cream and an angry tiger is glaring at me?

Edward and Bella came over and started messing with the tiger. Bella didn't like its stripes, so Edward got some shaving cream (it's not whipped, so yay! No wasted whipped cream) and tried to shave the damn tiger. The tiger got reasonably angry, and he ate Bella out of defense. Edward's on his way to Volterra right now.

आप didn't really miss anything big. :/

(Nothing against Twilight, I'm just bored and typing down बिना सोचे समझे things like Jeffersonian)

Well I wanted a pet kitty REALLY BAD! So I went to the zoo and got the prettiest looking kitty I could find(do आप how hard it is to sneak a cat out of the zoo?? I mean, My goodness!) and then as the years went द्वारा my kitty cat became my guard kitty and so today I got hungry and went to the fridge to get a bowl of whip cream when i heard my kitty growling. When I turned the corner I wasn't expecting anyone, soo.. when I saw आप it freaked me out and I dropped my bowl of whip cream and now आप owe me two bowls of whip cream to make up for it!! *glares at आप like tiger*

Well my friend, that glass if water... Was vodka. :)

Because आप ate my केला, केले and I thought the whip cream would look pretty.

This is why drugs are bad.

Uh...Well, I was kinda in the middle of giving Stripe, my new kitty his meal, and आप interrupted it...*Looks down at whip cream bottle* Oh..also we're out of मृग, एंटीलोप meat

I think someone(or something) pooped on the Tiger's floor((Yes, this is his/her place आप are in right now)And it looks like whip cream या it IS whip cream), and he/she is glaring at आप cause your the only other person in this room(Besides the tiger) and I think he/she is excusing आप for doing something wrong with that problem(Whip cream, duh. What else would it be?) on the floor O_O