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The worst "Harry Potter Sucks" arguments EVER!
The worst "Harry Potter Sucks" arguments EVER!
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पेश
द्वारा 
KateKicksAss
एक साल से अधिक पुराना
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3 fans
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XDXDXDXD
My entire thoughts on this:
This person is a moron who's never read Harry Potter, a dictionary/thesaurus, or Shakespeare, lives in a deluded bubble filled with Nazi brain-washing gas, and failed English class.
1)“There. I said it. I’ve been thinking it for a long time, holding my tongue - but I can’t hold it any longer.”
- Thanks for telling us? It’s not like anyone was stopping her/him (I think it’s a her - from now on I will call her a her) from voicing her opinion. It’s like she’s confessing a murder.
2)“Sometimes, I feel like the only person in the entire world that realizes these are children’s books. The movies, like the books, are for children.”
- Er… EVERYONE realizes this. J.K. Rowling states it. EVERYONE who picks up a Harry Potter book knows it’s a children’s book. That’s why we specifically looked in the “children’s” section to find it.
3)“The only thing that gives me any relief is the books are done, and I only have to endure the hype behind two more movies.”
- I know this is supposed to be “opinionated”, but if you’re trying to give legitimate reasons why you don’t like Harry Potter, rambling about “enduring the franchise” is not the way to go.
4)“Let’s start with the books: People would wait in line, overnight in tents sometimes, just to be the first to read the book all the way through. They’d cheer and hurrah that they could finish the book in 24 hours.”
- Because Harry Potter must be the ONLY book series people wait in line for overnight... Twilight, anyone?
5)“It’s a fucking children’s book! Of course you finished it quickly.”
- I don’t think this person is aware the last book of the series is literally over 700 pages long.
6)“I’m quite sure I can finish reading an entire Highlights magazine in less than twenty minutes, but no one would really be impressed with that, would they?”
- But I highly doubt an entire Highlights MAGAZINE is 700 pages long. Analogy Fail!
7)“The books have simple, predictable plots”
- She hasn’t read the books, has she?
8)“filled with magic and completely fantastical ideas.”
- I KNOW, RIGHT?
… Oh wait, that wasn’t a compliment.
9)“Writer J.K. Rowling has the vocabulary of a 14-year-old”
- I sincerely beg to differ. What is she comparing this to, the Lord of the Rings?
10)“and supplements her lack of vocabulary with words she completely makes up.”
- Because making up words is so bad? Okay, scratch my other comment, this person is obviously not a fan of LotR.
11)“This is all swept under the rug as creativity by her fans.”
- Because it IS creativity. Fail.
12)“Motherfuckers, you can’t just make up words.”
- W. T. F.?!?! That’s what you do when you create an ENTIRELY NEW WORLD. I have a feeling this person hates fantasy. And was the swearing necessary?
13)“If any other writer did that, they’d be laughed out of the industry.”
- Excuse me, I think I just died at the sheer stupidity of this statement. Was she sheltered as a child?
14)“The characters, in both the books and the movies, are completely unrealistic.”
- Is this person on drugs?
15)"If Harry Potter was some hotshot famous kid, he would have developed a drug problem and washed out before he ever hit year five."
- There was so much fail in that sentence I can’t think straight. For one thing, Harry didn’t even know he was famous until he turned ELEVEN. Therefore, it’d be impossible for him to “develop a drug problem” before he knew he was famous (according to her strange reasoning). Secondly, not all celebrities develop drug problems. Stereotype!
16)“I mean, c’mon – Hermione is Emma Watson. Even if she had AIDS, most straight men would do her without a condom.”
- Okay, EW! FIRST of all, Hermione in the books is SUPPOSED TO BE UGLY/UNATTRACTIVE. That settles it, this person has not read the books. And really, even if Hermione was “hot”, this person is implying that Harry should have chosen the hot girl, for the simple reason that she was hot. *facepalm* And actually, Ginny is the attractive one in the books. But of course the author of this article wouldn’t know that.
17)“In real life, he [Ron] and Harry would have never been friends. Famous people can’t hang out with gingers.”
- FAIL.
18)“Plus, his [Ron’s] character is whiny and obnoxious.”
- A complete matter of opinion.
19)“There is no way her character could have existed in reality. She’s a “muggle”, and her parents are both dentists. She’s endlessly self-conscious and looking for approval. If this book were anything close to reality, she would have the whore of Hogwarts.”
- Because every self-conscious girl in existence MUST look to men for approval? I’m starting to think this author is guy.
20)“She probably would have fucked both Harry and Ron, driving a wedge in their friendship, allowing Voldemort to take over the world.”
SO. MUCH. FAIL.
21)“But, I get it - it’s hard for an author to write a book about some whorish girl who can’t control her legs enough in time to save the planet.”
- Actually, it’s easy for an author to do that. J.K. Rowling decided not to because it’s not HERMIONE’S CHARACTER. *facepalm**facepalm**facepalm*
22)“Lastly, Harry Potter’s main enemy is a predictable copy of the bad guy from the first Karate Kid. Ice-blonde hair. Blue eyes.”
- First of all, Malfoy’s eyes are grey, not blue. Secondly, he was supposed to be predictable. If this person actually thoroughly read The Half-Blood Prince and Deathly Hallows, she would have realized that he’s not that “bad” after all, and the books showed that sometimes even the worst of people don’t have a lot of evil in them. Thirdly, Malfoy is clearly not the main enemy. I don't think this person exactly understood who Voldemort was.
23)"His last name “Malfoy”, makes him easy to point out as the bad guy, because “Mal” = “bad”.
- Actually, the name comes from “mal” and “foi” (correct me if I’m wrong, I can’t remember how it was spelled) which means “bad faith”. It’s quite sad; she only had enough energy in her to do HALF the research.
24)“He’s a bad guy, his dad was a bad guy, and his whole family seems to just suck shit in general.”
- *GASP* I beg to differ!
25)“Every time he says anything, it’s negative”
- Like the antagonist is supposed to do…
26)“and then he storms away like a teenage girl on her period.”
- Lol. *giggle*
27)“However, everyone at Hogwarts seems oblivious to his ulterior motives.”
- Ulterior motives? Like what? The only times I can think of his “ulterior motives” are his third year with the hippogriff and his sixth year with his mission from Voldemort. Other than that, he simply tormented the Golden Trio because, you know, he actually LIKES tormenting people.
28)“In real life, if he was as bad as everyone said he was, he would have sodomized Hermione in the girl’s bathroom in year four”
- Do you really think he would sink that low as to actually do that with HERMIONE? In real life, if you hate someone, you don’t normally “sodomize” them. (Unless your life is basically a teen drama t.v. show.) And who says he didn’t do that with other girls? Just because it’s not in the books doesn’t mean we can’t imply between the lines. Like the author said, this is a children’s book, after all.
29)“while Nearly Headless Nick videotaped it on his camera phone.”
- Why would Nearly Headless Nick be in on this? This was the ‘90’s, they didn’t have “camera phones”. And even if they did, these people are wizards; they don’t WANT camera phones. What would a GHOST need with a camera phone? *sighs*
30)“You know, because it’s important that everyone be able to pretend they’re a wizard.”
- Not important, but enjoyable.
31)“We’re all adults here, right?”
- Wrong.
32)“If I said I was going to a Star Wars theme park, everyone would laugh at me and call me a loser”
- Not necessarily. Star Wars was pretty much the Harry Potter before the actual Harry Potter. I think she’d be surprised on how many people would attend this.
33)“because it’s silly to want to be an astronaut fighter pilot that can do magic.”
- It is? I’m insulted!
34)"He can use his life to spare to lives of everyone else on Earth. That would make perfect sense."
- It actually does make sense.
35)“However, since it’s a children’s book, everyone wins.”
- WHAT?!?! I’m sorry, I thought she said “everyone won” in Harry Potter. Because not everyone won – Fred died, Moody died, Colin Creevey died, Sirius died, Dumbledore died, Lupin and Tonks died, Snape died, etc. I don’t think they’d count their death as “winning”.
36)“There must be a happy ending.”
- I don’t think she understands death.
37)“Harry gets to have his cake AND eat it too.”
- I don’t understand this metaphor. Is this person implying that Harry got everything he ever wanted? Whatever she was trying to say, it was a Metaphor Fail.
38)“I’d love to see Harry and Hermione get wrapped up in a sex scandal in the eighth book, or “accidentally” post some naked pictures on Twitter like Hayley Williams did.”
- Okay, I admit that’s funny.
39)“If you are a grown man or a grown woman, and you love Harry Potter, you, like Harry Potter, are a retard. That’s all I’m trying to say.”
- WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
40)“With so much amazing literature available to you, I think it’s sad that so many adults waste their time reading not one – but SEVEN children’s books.”
- I think it’s sad that she assumes all adults MUST not read children’s books or they are “retarded”. *eyetwitch* Not only is this unfair stereotyping, she is implying that people don’t go on to read other amazing literature books after they’ve read Harry Potter. FAIL.
41)“Next time you walk into a bookstore, try to avoid the section that says CHILDREN on the sign above it”
- So wait, first she claims we don’t know it’s a children’s book, but now she’s implying that we walk directly and knowingly into the children’s section so get this? Hypocrite, much? Is she really so narrow-minded that she believes reading a book meant for children is bad? What is she, fifteen? Well, due to her atrocious persuasive methods, you never know…
That’s it. This MUST be troll. The whole thing is too ignorant and stupid not to be.
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