Hides a Thousand Feelings...

I don't know who I want to be. I just can't decide whether I want to be quiet and mysterious या sociable and cheerful. आप may think it's an obvious choice, but it's not for me.

I feel like being both, but I feel like it's wrong to be both. everything with me is either one या the other.

On one hand,I feel like pushing people aside.Mostly because they annoy me,but also because I feel better when I'm alone. One the other hand,I feel like talking to everyone with joyfulness.

I feel like the whole world is frowning upon me.

But yet I feel like smiling and that I can do anything without being ashamed. Every time I do this though,it turns to be something to be ashamed about and just wanting to keep my happiness inside and to never दिखाना it again.

Feeling like crawling inside a hole.

Feeling sorrow,guilt,embarrassment,happiness,unstoppable,trapped,and furious all at the same time. It's driving me crazy!

These regrets are और like nightmares. And these nightmares never end. Somebody please stop them before I go insane.

Feeling like no one can save me from the depths of my disgrace.

All of my रंग have turned gray since the first दिन I felt this way.

I know there's people who प्यार me and couldn't live without me,but that doesn't change the fact that I want to disappear. Because all I ever do is make mistakes.

Making the wrong हटाइए at the wrong time is what I do. For there isn't room for people like me.

I don't want to feel any emotion. Not even प्यार for I fear there is still a gaping hole inside of me that I can't seem to fill.

Feeling detached from everything is the only way I can put how I really feel. Everything just seems so far out of reach. I want to be one of those people who feel complete but it seems impossible.

I am so weak because the only thing keeping me alive is my fear of pain.