Why They're My शिशु 

So, the first suggestion was Buffy and Angel! This is probably gonna get long so more under the cut. 

This was the first couple I ever felt so strongly about, before I even knew what shipping or OTPs were. I’ve rewatched the series several times over the years and fall in love with it more and more. 

Now, Buffy and Angel have a long history together so forgive me if I screw up the chronological order because I was excited to jump to one thing or another. 

The first moment that made me like them was actually the episode 1 because the Angel we saw didn’t really give off the brooder vibe we saw later. Instead, he was a bit of a smart ass that came and went like the wind with his cryptic but helpful warnings. It wasn’t really a love at first sight deal, instead Buffy kept her wits about her and was wary of this man in a town that was already proving to be filled with dangerous folk.

The banter between them is also really important to me because even though they have a lot of sad moments, they also have fun with each other during down time.  

Me, personally, I can’t help but be amused when a girl uses snarky banter to distance herself from someone she’s actually attracted/drawn to. And that’s what she’s doing in the episode he decides to give her his jacket. Angel realizes she’s actually chilly and gives her his jacket, ignoring the fact that she had snarked at him. Her comfort was important to him and it’s the first time (from what I remember) that she starts to look at him differently. 

Then skip to 1x07, properly entitled “Angel.” The episode where we find out what he is and who he was. I love everything about this episode, let’s be real. Of course there was their first kiss, but Buffy was struggling through most of it on trying to find out whether Angel is good or bad. The evidence of Giles’ book about his time as “Angelus” and Darla making it seem like he bit Joyce certainly didn’t help. 

She goes to the Bronze to prepare to kill him, but hears out what he has to say and they end up fighting against Darla together =D. Yay, teamwork! What’s more important to me about this episode is their kiss at the end of it. It’s a “goodbye” kiss because they feel they can’t be together. But Buffy’s cross necklace ends up searing a burn into Angel’s chest as a result. 

I might be over analyzing, but I felt like this was symbolism for the fact that Buffy would always be seared into Angel’s heart. I’ll get to more about how that’s obviously true later. 

And then the rest of the season wasn’t really about them or their interactions. It’s clear things wouldn’t be over, but I actually liked that their love story didn’t develop all in one season. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing to do that in a show, I was just okay that it didn’t happen. 

   The season where I cry every other episode e.e 

We all remember this HEART BREAKING, EVIL SEASON OF FEELS PUNCHING. But I’m getting ahead of myself. 

Episode 1 of this season was about Buffy’s emotional recovery from dying and dealing with the fact that she’s traumatized over the Master. But the end of it when they’ve defeated the bad guys, there’s that moment of silence as Buffy stares at the Master’s bones. 

I can’t remember who (I think it was Xander) who said “it’s over,” and Angel instantly responds “No, it’s not,” as he moves for Buffy. This is so important to me because he

 that Buffy is at the breaking point. And after she crushes the bones of the Master, she breaks down and clings to him. The reason this is such a defining moment to me is because Angel out of everybody there was the one that stepped forward. Not Giles or Willow, but Angel was the one that understood where she was at emotionally and was going to need somebody. 

There relationship develops rather well to actually dating after that, which cues a lot of cute moments. But I’m sticking with the moments that have always been drilled into my brain. 

2x13, “Surprise” is a big one, obviously. It’s the first time they say they love each other and sleep together. But the scene that moved me was when they were on the docks, earlier in the episode. Angel was going to leave to get the arm away so Spike and Dru couldn’t create “The Judge”.  And he gives her that

ring to say “I belong to you and you belong to me.” It’s an “I love you” without the actual words.

And then Angel is turned evil, turning into the main villian of the season. As the slayer, Buffy has a duty to protect the world from evil. And she knows she can’t stray from that, she tries not to but it’s so difficult for her when it comes to Angel. She can’t forget what she feels, because in 2x13 Angel says “I love you, I try not to but I can’t stop” and Buffy pretty much says she feels the same way. 

2x19 is when they get possessed by ghosts playing out their tragic love story in an attempt to make a different ending and be at peace. This isn’t possible until Angel is possessed by the woman (Grace), who gets shot, and Buffy is possessed by the boy (James) who shoots her. Obviously Angel can’t die  from a gun shot or a fall.

So, still possessed, he rushes off to find Buffy in the music room before she commits suicide (James is still possessing her of course.) James and Grace have their reconciliation, but the words seem to be so much like the

What gets me is their kiss, James and Grace leave their bodies and there’s just that few seconds where Angel and Buffy are kissing. It’s

kiss, like it’s instinctual. But the thing that’s matters so much is that Angelus doesn’t flee right away. They both stand there, realizing what just happened and I always believe that just for a

he remembered what it was like to love the Slayer. How in love he was with her. 

Buffy never forgot, she certainly remembers everything; you can tell by the way she says his name before he shoves her away and runs. It breaks my heart, but the scene is part of what screamed to me they’d always love each other because even without a soul, Buffy Summers still had left a mark on his heart. 

I think Becoming Part 1 and 2; the season finale; sort of concretes the type of love Buffy and Angel have. Which is a selfless love. No matter how much they may love each other, the world and the safety of those they care about is more important.

By now, Buffy has accepted that she has to stop Angel, has to kill him. She’d given up on trying to save him after Willow’s spell fails the first time. And I don’t really fault her for this, Angel’s done terrible things throughout season 2 and time is running out: she’s doing what she has to do. 

Even when the spell works at the last minute, it’s too late. We all know the heart-breaking scene that follows. But the point of pointing out all the sadness of season two is to basically say: their

. This couple isn’t about being on and off again or love triangles; all the obstacles are outside forces and circumstances that constantly drive them apart. Buffy finally got the love of her life back and then has to kill him because if she doesn’t the world ends and she doesn’t get to be with him anyway. 

This is my over all favorite season out of the entire series, even though Angel and Buffy break up. I’m not going to focus too much on 1 episode here, but over all stuff. 

That being said; the episode that stands out the most to me is 3x10, Amends. Evil is haunting Angel for what he’s done and he’s ready to kill himself. The entire scene where they’re on the cliff before dawn still makes me cry. Everything just comes pouring out between them, the self-loathing they both have. And yet still, Buffy will not let him die again. She fights him every inch to believe that life is worth living. 

And then it’s like fate that snow covers Sunnydale, overcast keeping the sun from coming out. It’s all so very beautiful and it kills me. 

Season 3 has a lot of defining moments for their relationship; even after they break up there’s still such a strong, important connection between them. As I said, their relationship is ultimately tragic and something the universe didn’t allow to last because there were moments that they could have gotten back together, but circumstances kept it from happening. 

I wasn’t really okay with the fact that Angel left in season 3 until I was older and could appreciate their story. And even though they were apart and sometimes when they saw each other things got hostile; it was clear they would always be each other’s soul mates. 

Their story isn’t necessarily a happy one, but they love each other so strongly that there will never truly be anyone else for them. They’re my babies because they showed me a love story can still be beautiful and satisfying even if they don’t ride off into the sunset. 

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